


Nothing To Talk About

by artsypolarbear



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Bickering, F/F, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Occasional angst, Sassy Raven
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-20
Updated: 2017-01-31
Packaged: 2018-06-03 10:18:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 53,589
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6607132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artsypolarbear/pseuds/artsypolarbear
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Raven finds herself in need of a roommate. Anya's in need of a place to live. It makes sense that she moves in with Raven, her sister's girlfriend's best friend, who she knows absolutely nothing about. It's the perfect arrangement for the both of them.</p><p>So what if they find themselves consistently drawn to one another?</p><p>It's nothing to talk about.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> im ranya trash and i cannot and will not be stopped  
> modern ranya AU here we go!

The first time Anya met Raven, it was late. She was tired, she was sleepy, and she was very cranky – she’d spent the past two days on call, driving from one catastrophe to another, tending to cuts and bruises and wounds and people both dead and alive.

Work as a paramedic wasn’t as glorious as it sounds.

She was staying at Clarke and Lexa’s place till she found her own. Having only just returned to Polis, Anya was yet to find herself an apartment she liked – she’d barely had any time to go look, and all of the ones that she had seen were either way out of her budget or had irritating roommates to accompany them.

There were two couches in the living room. Anya had only just come home, finding Clarke and Lexa had already gone to bed, and had literally just laid down onto the couch she'd claimed as hers when the doorbell rang. Knowing very well that Clarke and Lexa were unlikely to even hear, judging by the giggles and moans she’d heard a while earlier, Anya got up and went to the door.

On the doorstep stood a woman, probably Lexa’s age. She wore a red bomber jacket and her hair in a messy ponytail, and her face looked to have a perpetual smirk on it’s features; her eyes were brown and yet seemed to burn with a light Anya couldn’t quite fathom, and the jut of her chin was almost amusing, considering she appeared shorter and younger than she was.

“And you are?”

“I’m Raven,” the girl said, extending her hand. “You must be Anya. Can I come in?”

Anya took her hand with hesitation, and shook it lightly.

“This isn’t my house so I can’t really-“

“I’m Clarke’s best friend. She’ll be fine with it.”

“You could be an axe murderer for all I know.”

The girl let out a laugh and opened her bag to show it only contained a pile of clothes. “No axe here. Please let me in?”

Anya sighed and moved away from the door, allowing the brunette to step in. “Why are you here at this time? It’s early morning.”

“Let’s just say I need emergency accommodation,” Raven sighed, slumping down on the couch – her couch, Anya noted. There were two to choose from, and the brunette had of course managed to sit down on the one that Anya called her bed.

“Emergency accommodation?”

Raven shrugged. “My roommate got busted for having a meth lab in his room. The cops won’t let me in to my own apartment for a day.”

“Your roommate?”

“Trust me, I had no idea. That jackass could’ve blown us both up, with all the tubes connected wrong-“

Anya raised an eyebrow. “And you know that they were connected wrong how exactly?”

Raven laughed again, the sound echoing in the otherwise quiet apartment. “I promise you, I’ve never cooked meth in my life. It was just an example I studied in chem class, that’s all.”

“I see.”

Anya was about to say something more, but was interrupted by the door to the bedroom opening, out of which walked Clarke, looking sleepy and confused as ever.

“Raven?” Clarke asked, blinking in the low light. “What are you doing here?”

“I’ve come here to commandeer your couch.”

“Oh, alright,” Clarke yawned. “We’ll talk in the morning.”

With that, she went back into the bedroom, leaving Raven and Anya alone in the living room.

“You’re sitting on my couch,” Anya said after a while.

“Your couch?”

“Yes.”

“As in you’re sleeping here as well?”

“Yes.”

“And this is your couch?”

“Yes. Get up.”

“Damnit,” Raven whined as she got up and moved over to the other couch, “You picked the better of the two. This one gives me backaches.”

“Precisely why I picked this one,” Anya smirked as she laid down onto the couch and pulled the blanket back over herself. “Now shut up.”

“Rude. At least give me one pillow.”

Anya grumbled but grabbed a pillow and chucked it in Raven’s general direction.

“Wow, you clearly aren’t a morning person,” Raven muttered as she went over to the cupboard next to the bathroom to get herself a blanket.

“I’ve been up for two days straight,” Anya replied.

“Partying, I hope?”

“More like saving lives.”

“Oh. Right, you’re a paramedic?”

“Yes.”

“That’s cool.”

Anya was in no mood for chit-chat.

“Good night, Raven.”

She was already half asleep, but the fact that Raven seemed to know more about Anya than Anya knew of her stuck in her mind.

Granted, Anya knew nothing about Raven, so any amount of knowledge Raven had of her was greater than her own.

But then she yawned and turned to face the couch, and fell asleep.

Raven sat on the couch for a little while, staring at the slight rise and fall of Anya’s shoulders. She barely knew a thing about Anya, only that she was Lexa’s sister and four years her elder, and that she worked as a paramedic. She wasn’t so sure why she remembered the fact, or where she’d heard it. She had been curious about this mysterious sister that she’d never met, despite knowing Lexa for almost four years now – she and Clarke had been going steady for that long, and Raven, being Clarke’s best friend, had of course been the first one to whom Lexa was introduced.

Letting out a sigh, she turned on the couch to find a more comfortable position, but found it impossible – there was something, a spring or a piece of metal or god-knows-what that was pressing into the small of her back no matter how she laid, and so she finally opted for the least uncomfortable position and forced herself to shut her eyes.

 

* * *

 

Raven woke in the morning to the smell of coffee and bacon wafting around the apartment. With a yawn that turned quickly into a groan, Raven sat up, stretching her arms high and wide as she blinked furiously to regain her eyesight. It was bright in the apartment, and she was still half asleep, extremely confused as to why she was sleeping on Clarke’s couch.

And then she remembered the events of the night.

_“It’s the police, open up!”_

Jasper had tried to escape via the fire escape.

It hadn’t gone down well. He’d been tackled in the street with Raven watching from the window above. It would’ve been funny if it hadn’t been a friend getting his ass busted for drugs. He was surely going to jail for it.

It had taken hours upon hours for her to finally convince the cops that she hadn’t had any clue of the meth lab, and that she had nothing to do with the business – but finally she’d been released, only to learn that her apartment was part of the investigation and that she would get it back the next day. They'd said something about cleaning, too, and that Raven had no problems with - what she did have problems with was the fact that she'd been kicked out of her apartment at about 3 in the morning.

 “Well, good morning to you,” Lexa greeted her when Raven finally got up and headed over to the kitchen for some food. “Anya’s still asleep, isn’t she?”

Raven nodded. “Like a rock. She may be dead.”

Lexa laughed and handed her a plate. “Help yourself,” she said. “And no, Anya’s probably not dead. She just sleeps like a rock.”

“Must be fun saving lives.”

“It’s exhausting, that’s for sure,” Lexa told her. “Clarke already left for work. She told me to interrogate you as to why you’ve “commandeered” our couch.”

Raven sat down with her plate full of eggs and bacon, and sighed. “Jasper, my roommate – apparently he’s been cooking and dealing meth from his room for months. The cops busted him, dragged both of us down to the station, basically spent _hours_ demanding I admit that I was in on it too, and then, when they finally let me out, I find out that I’m not allowed back into my apartment for another day because of an ongoing investigation. They let me get some clothes and such, but that’s it.”

Lexa raised an eyebrow. “And you’re sure you had nothing to do with it?”

“Look, I like Breaking Bad just as much as the next person, but I’d never think to make it a reality. Jasper’s an idiot.”

She sipped her coffee and burned her tongue, and Lexa laughed. “Look, I’ve got to go open the store. Wake Anya up before you head down to work, ok? She needs to eat.”

“If she kills me, it’s on you.”

Lexa rolled her eyes and grabbed her bag before making her way out of the apartment, leaving Raven sitting alone at the kitchen table. When she was done with her food, she went over to the kitchen and set up a plate for Anya before cleaning up the remaining dishes from breakfast – it was only polite, considering she’d be Clarke and Lexa’s house guest for a few days.

She wasn’t expected at the autoshop till eleven, and so she laid back on the couch to play around on her phone for a little bit. Anya was still fast asleep, curled up on the couch, and Raven had to resist the urge to go over and mess with her – she was sure that if she dared to paint a moustache on Lexa’s elder sister, she would surely die, but she couldn’t help the temptation.

Anya was woken when Raven’s phone suddenly rang, the volume settings still at their loudest from when she’d been at the autoshop. The shrill ringing pierced her consciousness and jolted her awake, and she turned to look at Raven as though she were planning to kill her.

Raven had hopped up the instant the phone had rang, and answered almost immediately, giving Anya an apologetic look before walking over to the other end of the room to answer.

“Hey, Finn.”

“Raven! Are you okay?”

“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”

“I just went by your place and there was a cop outside telling me I couldn’t go in. He wouldn’t tell me anything-“

“Finn, I’m fine,” Raven sighed. “Jasper got busted for cooking meth.”

“Meth?”

“Mhm.”

“But you’re okay?”

“Yeah, I’m staying at Clarke’s for now. I’m fine.”

“I was going to bring you breakfast,” Finn said. “You want me to bring it there?”

There was hopefulness in his voice, one which Raven felt nothing for.

“Nah, I already ate,” she sighed. “I need to go down to the shop soon anyway.”

“Oh. Okay.”

There was a moment of silence.

“Do you want to come stay at my place?”

Raven grimaced. She didn’t.

 “It's only for last night that I needed a place to stay. I'll be back home tonight.”

“You could've come to my place."

"Yeah, but I know you work so late..." Raven tried to sound kind. "Look, I gotta go to work now."

“Okay. Love you.”

“Love you.”

Anya had been watching the exchange curiously, and heard Raven sigh heavily when she set the phone down. When the brunette turned around, she saw that Anya was watching her, and made a face.

“That was my boyfriend,” she explained. “Sorry if I woke you.”

Anya stifled a yawn. “It’s fine. I was starving anyways.”

The instant she got up, Raven sat down on her couch, remote in hand. When Anya threw her a curious look, Raven just shrugged and said: “This one’s more comfy. And Top Gear’s on.”

“I thought you said you had to go down to the shop.”

“Eavesdropping on private conversations is not polite,” Raven tutted. “And no. I still have a few hours. There’s food in the kitchen.”

Anya nodded and went her way, and came back a while later with a reheated plate of eggs and bacon and a mug of tea.

“So,” Raven began when the show ended, “What are you doing here?”

“Here?”

“Yeah, as in Polis. I’ve never met you, and this isn’t such a big place that you could just avoid anyone completely, so…”

“I came back here to work. Got a good offer that I couldn’t refuse.”

“I see. But why are you sleeping on Lexa’s couch?”

“Haven’t found an apartment that I can afford and like yet.”

“You could check out my apartment,” Raven offered. “I now find myself in need of a roommate.”

“Is the apartment nice?”

“Kinda like this one. Here, I’ve got pictures.”

Raven showed Anya  a few pictures from her Instagram, most of which were pictures from house parties and such – many of them featured Raven doing some ridiculous pose, sometimes standing on her head or her hands, and Anya almost smiled.

“It’s a second-floor apartment, you’d have a parking space and your own room, and there’s a park right nearby – and, wait, which hospital do you work at?”

“North Hill.”

“North Hill’s just around the corner. A walking distance, twenty minutes at most.”

“Sounds good. How about the rent?”

“700 bucks.”

“That’s manageable.”

“Great. So you in?”

Anya let out a laugh. “How about I first actually _see_ this apartment, and then we talk more?”

“That’s fair. You’ll love it.”


	2. Chapter 2

Two days later Anya went down to see the apartment.

Raven hadn’t been wrong about it being close to the hospital – her estimate of twenty minutes was way too much, and Anya was very pleased to think that she’d be able to just roll out of bed and walk to work. Any added minutes of sleep were a plus.

The park nearby was neat, and the neighbourhood seemed clean and safe enough – though it wasn’t in any way high end, it wasn’t full of messy drunks or such; it was average and more than enough for Anya.

Especially since her last apartment had been only a little bigger than a shoebox, and her neighbors had consisted of a rowdy Armenian family on one side and a bunch of frat boys on the other. Not to mention her only companion had been one cockroach that she hadn't through some impossible feat managed to kill.

She had to ring the buzzer twice before Raven’s voice finally sounded on the comm.

"Hello?"

"Raven?"

“Anya?”

“Yeah, it’s me. Let me in?”

“Door’s open. Don’t use the elevator, it’s not broken but it makes scary noises and I’m pretty sure it’ll fall down one day.”

Anya chuckled to herself but went up the stairs anyway. There were four apartments on their floor, and the door to Raven’s place was open as she’d promised. Raven was sat on the couch, watching TV and eating peanut butter from the jar, and greeted her with a respectful raise of her spoon.

“Welcome to my bat cave,” she said, spreading her hands. “I tried to clean up a little bit.”

That much was true – amidst the oddly bare apartment, there were only a few mugs out of place and one pile of dirty clothes next to the hamper. Anya looked around and saw it to be up to her standards, and was followed around by Raven and her commentary.

“Now, there’ll be hard-duty industrial cleaners in tomorrow to wipe every speck of meth off this place, and thankfully, it’s covered by the building’s insurance so we pay nothing. Your room won’t be a health hazard, if you choose to take it.”

Anya glanced at Raven and nodded. “Is it always this empty?”

Raven shook her head. “Jasper’s sister came by earlier and took all his shit away. If you’ve got furniture, you’re welcome to bring it. We’re in dire need of an armchair and a dining table.”

“I’ve only got my clothes,” Anya told her. "And a few books, just one box and a suitcase."

“Oh, then you’ll need a bed. As I said, his sister took all his shit,” Raven told her as she pushed open the door to an entirely empty room. “This would be your room.”

Anya stepped in and walked around a little bit, noting that there was still a strip of yellow police tape on the floor. Raven swept it up and crumbled it into a ball in her hand, and leaned on the door frame as Anya looked around.

“Your window opens,” she told Anya. “Mine doesn’t, but my room’s a little bigger so that makes up for it.”

“And we share a bathroom?”

“Yeap. Shower’s fine, we rarely run out of hot water.”

“And the kitchen?”

“It’s fine. One of the cupboard doors is a little loose but I’ve been meaning to fix that.”

Anya gave the room one last look and the nodded. “Alright, yeah. I’ll take it.”

“You will? Sweet!”

“Do you have a car by any chance?”

Raven nodded. “Why, you need a ride to the furniture store?”

“Maybe? I’d ask Clarke and Lexa, but they’re going off on some romantic getaway, so-“

“Yeah, sure. I’m free tomorrow, we can go and buy you a bed and us a dining table and an armchair.”

“D’you have any money?”

“Yep, Jasper just paid his debts to me last week – so what if it’s drug money, he owed it to me fair and square.”

Anya rolled her eyes. “Fair enough. I’ll stay at Lexa’s for tonight, but tomorrow?”

“Got it, roomie.”

 

* * *

 

Anya was roused at 9 in the morning by a call from an unknown number. She’d seen Clarke and Lexa set off to work, and had turned to go back to sleep – but not half an hour later she received a call, and groaned as she reached over to answer it.

“Hello?”

“Anya?”

“Raven?”

“Thank god, I was half thinking Clarke had given me the wrong number, “ Raven sighed. “Are you ready to go do some shopping?”

“This early?”

“It’s nine in the morning.”

“I would’ve pegged you for someone who sleeps in,” Anya muttered as she stood up to go start on breakfast.

“You weren’t wrong, but Finn had to go to work so I had to leave his place.”

“I see.”

Anya hadn’t intended to sound as cold as she did, but paid no more thought to it. “You woke me up.”

“I’m halfway there. Five minutes tops.”

“You’ll have to wait for a bit.”

“No problem.”

Raven rang the doorbell not five minutes later, and when the door opened, she was flustered for the briefest of moments – Anya’s hair was a mess, and she wore only a sports bra and some shorts, showcasing her lithe body in a way that made Raven’s breath hitch in her throat. But then Anya had gone off to the bathroom, leaving Raven alone in the doorway, and she had to shake her head to clear her mind.

She’d just been surprised, Raven told herself. She hadn’t expected to see her half-naked. It had nothing to do with the tattoo that she’d seen sprawling upwards from Anya’s hip, or the fact that her shorts had been _very_ low on her hips…

No, it was nothing. Raven sat down and sighed, and thought of the night before – after heavily considering it, she’d gone over to Finn’s, and she’d had a fun night. They’d ordered pizza and watched Star Trek, and a playful argument had turned into sex.

It had all been fine till Finn had laid back down beside her, and in is half-sleeping haze, had murmured the words that Raven had grown to loathe.

“I love you, Raven.”

The words had sent chills down Raven’s spine, and made guilt twist in her gut; she’d pretended to already be asleep, and Finn had fallen asleep a little later, his arms wrapped around Raven’s waist both warm and nice with just the slightest hint of entrapment. Raven had slept, but not soundly, feeling guilty as she always did.

Finn was nice. She loved hanging out with him, she enjoyed sitting around and eating pizza and arguing about Star Trek – but the rest she didn’t really care for. She preferred having her bed to herself, sleeping alone and not having someone breathing down her neck when she tried to relax.

_I’m just a mess,_ Raven thought to herself, twirling a strand of hair between her fingers, _Finn’s been there for me for such a long time. Maybe I’m just getting used to him._

She knew it wasn’t true, she knew she was lying to herself, and yet, she couldn’t bring herself to end it. Finn was her best friend, right after Clarke. Finn was her oldest friend. She had no desire to break his heart, especially not yet when he’d only just started at his new job down at the police station. No, he didn’t need that distraction now when he was trying to make himself a career.

It wasn’t like Raven had anything better waiting around. Finn was the best option she had as of now, the safest and least likely to mess her life up any further.

“Earth to Raven?”

“Huh?” Raven snapped out of her haze to find Anya waving a hand at her. She’d gotten dressed, clad in ripped dark jeans and a muscle tee, and on her arm she had a leather jacket that she no doubt intended on putting on once they got outside.

“We were supposed to go shopping? Or would you rather sit here and daydream about your boyfriend for the day?”

Raven rolled her eyes and got up. “I wasn’t daydreaming.”

“Sure looked like it.”

“Well, Frowny Princess, how about we get going?”

“Frowny Princess?”

Raven threw Anya a smirk as she walked out of the apartment. “It’s my nickname for you. I give them to everyone.”

Anya sighed and walked out, shutting the door behind her with the spare key Lexa had lent to her before hurrying after Raven.

“So, what are your nicknames for Clarke and Lexa, then?” She asked when she climbed into the passenger seat of Raven’s age-old car.

“Commander Heart-eyes and Tits. You can figure which is which.”

Anya chuckled and laid back in the seat as they set off on the road. “Clarke’s Tits?”

“Mhm.”

“Might I ask why?”

“Have you seen her rack?”

Anya let out a scoff. “I make it a rule to not ogle my sister’s girlfriends’ racks.”

“But you’re not blind, are you?”

“So you call Clarke Tits because she’s got a nice rack?”

“That, and because she calls me Ass. It’s our thing – we’re Tits & Ass, the dangerous duo.”

Once again, Anya had to suppress a smile. “Lexa must love that.”

“She loathes it,” Raven chuckled. “She hates Commander Heart-eyes, too. But too bad – it’s stuck, and Clarke uses it too.”

“I understand heart-eyes, but Commander?”

“She’s bossy.”

“Not _that_ bossy.”

“Bossy enough,” Raven told her. “Now, are you a sophisticated bitch or is Ikea okay?”

“Ikea’s fine.”

 

* * *

 

“Okay, now…which one?”

Anya looked back and forth between two tables and sighed. “Does it really matter?”

“Depends,” Raven smirked. “This one’s black, that one’s plain wood.”

“You pick. I like them both.”

Raven glanced around the section, and upon seeing they were alone, promptly sat on top of the first table. There was a little cracking noise, and she hopped off quickly, all the while Anya was gaping at her with wide eyes.

“What are you doing?”

“Testing how sturdy the table is, of course,” Raven said in a matter-of-fact tone. "This one clearly isn't sturdy at all."

“You’re not sitting on that other table.”

“Stop me if you like, but I’m not going to be fixing our dining table every month because it keeps breaking down.”

Anya sighed and didn’t stop Raven when she sat on the black table, and this time, there was no crack – Raven wiggled a little, and, finding the table was sturdy, got off and smiled. “Yep, this one.”

Anya just shook her head and moved on, and after Raven had jotted down the product code, she ran after her.

“Okay, we’ve got the table. Now for the armchairs.”

“We’re actually coming to the bed section now.”

Anya sighed. “God, there’s so many.”

“Don’t be so glum, Frowny Princess,” Raven smirked. “Bed shopping is the most fun.”

Through some manipulation and nagging, Raven managed to get Anya to try a far greater number of beds than what she really wanted to. And then, when she’d finally settled on a mattress, there was the choice of everything else – the bedframe and headboard, the duvets and pillows, and bedsheets. With those Anya took her sweet time, so much so that Raven actually grew bored and sat down on their cart while Anya pondered between two sorts of headboards. In the end she opted with one that had a criss-cross pattern, sleek black, simple and yet stylish.

And, most importantly, it came at a very reasonable price.

She came back to the cart to find Raven making an exaggeratedly exhausted face, and rolled her eyes.

“Get up.”

“My achy knee is acting up,” Raven whined. “You can push me.”

“You don’t have an achy knee.”

“Yes I do, I had surgery on it two years ago after a skateboarding accident.”

“It looks fine.”

“Stop complaining and push me.”

Anya sighed but complied anyway, ignoring the curious looks the two of them drew from the few people around them; Raven sat in the cart, cross-legged, looking silly, and Anya felt silly for pushing her around.

After spending far too much time trying to find the perfect armchair and settling on a soft, big, and plushy one, they headed out.

Except on their way out they had to pass through many other sections, and so they ended up piling a whole bunch of unnecessary items into Raven’s car – while the mattress and bedframe and table fit just and just, among the few plants and other little things Anya had bought for her room, the armchair and bookshelf Anya had picked out for herself had to be delivered.

“Okay,” Raven said when they’d parked in front of their house. “Now we need to maneuver all of this upstairs.”

“We could use the elevator?”

Raven, who’d already gotten out of the car, laughed. “I’m not risking my life in that tiny metal box, and neither are you.”

The mattress, though rolled up tight, required two people to carry because of it’s sheer size. The remaining packages were so heavy that they carried them together, Anya remaining quiet and barely breaking a sweat while Raven ended up complaining by the end of it all.

“I’m so tired I couldn’t even lift a spoon,” she whined. “And I’m hungry.”

“We literally ate like an hour ago.”

“I know, but all that exercise, you know…”

Raven’s phone beeped for the third time in the span of a few minutes, but still, she didn’t check it.

“Nothing important?” Anya asked as she walked over to the kitchen for some scissors.

“Yeah, something like that.” Raven muttered. She knew who it was, and didn’t feel like answering quite yet. “You need help?”

“I think I can build a bed on my own, thank you very much.”

Turns out she couldn’t, and so, not five minutes later, Anya was forced to come back to ask for Raven’s help.

“I just need you to hold the frame up,” she muttered, “I can still do this on my own.”

Raven laughed but said nothing, and together they set up her bed with little to no struggles other than Anya stubbing her toe on a box once - to Raven's astonishment, the stoic woman actually let out a rather loud curse, though her expression didn't change in any other way to indicate that she was in pain.

When they were done, Raven went into the kitchen to build the dining table. Anya entered a moment later with a pile of trash in her hands and almost ran into her, twirling a screwdriver in one hand and reading the instructions with the other.

"It's like reading a cartoon," Raven said, "Except it's just got nuts and bolts and lots of arrows. Building a table can't be that hard, can it?"

"D'you have any coffee?"

"Just tea."

Anya just rolled her eyes and put the kettle on to make herself some tea. As she stood around waiting for the water to boil, she couldn’t of course avoid looking at Raven, building the table with nimble and skilled hands that seemed to know the instructions by heart.

“I would make such a good lesbian,” Raven muttered, mostly to herself – she even laughed. Anya couldn’t believe she’d just witnessed her brand new roommate not only make a half-assed lesbian joke but also laugh at her own joke, and shook her head in disbelief.

Raven’s words did spark a little bit of interest – they implied that Raven wasn’t a lesbian, a fact which Anya had already drawn from the fact that she had a boyfriend and had spent a long while during their shopping trip staring at a relatively attractive guy.

He might’ve even been hot, but it wasn’t like Anya knew anything of that sort. She had no eye for male looks, and so she rarely even thought to notice.

It’s not like she particularly cared. She was just curious.

“I’m going to go down to Lexa’s place to get the last of my stuff,” Anya said. “And I think I’ll go to the store. Do you need anything?”

Raven looked at her over her shoulder and shrugged. “I dunno. Check the fridge.”

Anya did, and found it almost entirely empty – there was one expired carton of milk, some beer, the half-eaten jar of peanut butter, and a plateful of leftover pizza.

“I’m going to buy actual food, you want to chip in or what?”

“There’s pizza, though.”

“Not real food.”

“What are you, my mom?”

Anya rolled her eyes, and Raven just laughed. Her phone rang again, and this time, it woldn’t let up – seeing Anya’s curious look, Raven realized there was no way she could ignore it, and so she answered with a fake smile and a tone far too chirpy to be normal.

“Hey, Finn!”

"Hi Raven. I've been texting you."

"Yeah, I haven't had the time to answer quite yet."

“You’ve got your day off today, right?”

“Yeah?”

“You wanna, you know—“

“Finn, I’m so sorry, but I’ve got plans,” Raven sighed. Anya was on her way out, but Raven tapped her shoulder and mouthed ' _wait'_  to her, and so Anya sat down on the couch to watch the brunette pace back and forth as she talked on the phone.

“Plans?”

Finn sounded disappointed, and Raven felt sorry.

"Yeah."

"With who?"

“Nothing too special, Lexa’s sister moved in with me to replace Jasper’s dumb ass, and I promised I’d help her with some shopping.”

“Oh. Well, I’ve got the night shift today, so you wanna meet up tomorrow? We could go see Star Wars again.”

“Yeah, sure. Sounds like fun.”

Raven knew Finn was smiling then, and for the briefest of moments, she felt happy that she’d made him happy.

“Great. I’ll pick you up at 7? The movie starts at half past eight, but we could get something to eat.”

“Yeah. See you tomorrow, Floppy Disk.”

Finn groaned. “Don’t call me that.”

“Until you change your hairstyle, you will forever be Floppy Disk in my heart,” Raven joked. “I gotta go, Anya looks like she’s ready to murder me.”

“Anya?”

“Lexa’s sister. My new roommate.”

“Oh, right. Well, see you tomorrow.”

“Yeah, see you then.”

Raven hung up the call with a sigh, and instantly saw Anya’s bemused look and frowned.

“What was that?” Anya asked. “Not up to seeing your boyfriend?”

Raven scowled. “Shut up.”

“Seeing as you used me as an excuse to not see him, I think you owe me at least some form of explanation.”

“No, I don’t. But I will give you a ride to Lexa’s and go grocery shopping with you, if you want. I’m suddenly craving watermelon.”

“Watermelon?”

“A perfectly reasonable craving,” Raven shrugged. “Counts as real food too, right?”

Anya rolled her eyes and followed the brunette out of the apartment, but right as they had gotten out of the door, Raven stopped so abruptly Anya almost ran into her.

“Your key,” Raven gasped. “Almost forgot you need a key.”

She pushed past Anya and returned a little while later with a key which she pressed into her hand. “There you go. Now you’re officially privy to the secrets of the bat cave.”

“What secrets?”

“That’s for you to figure out.” Raven gave her a mysterious look and walked off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you haven't quite caught on yet, i really, really dislike Finn.  
> also raven's a snarky adorable bastard and i love her with all my heart, and anya's flustered ass is too precious to deal with  
> don't forget to leave kudos and comments :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am on some strange ranya-roll and until it stops, i can't not write more chapters because these IDIOTS are so precious

Raven woke up in the morning with a headache and a good morning text from Finn.

_Hope your day starts with a smile. I woke up thinking about you, so my day was already made._

Raven’s day definitely did not start with a smile. No, it started with a headache and a loud groan as she rolled over, trying to think of something to text back. She’d seen the text, and knew Finn would notice she’d read it, and so she forced herself to write something nice back.

_Good morning to u too, Floppy Disk. We r seeing Star Wars 2day so ofc I’m smiling._

It wasn’t all a lie, and so she was satisfied enough with it. Leaving her phone somewhere amidst her sheets, Raven got up to go take a shower. The door was locked, and she could hear the shower – evidently Anya was taking a shower. With a sigh, Raven turned on her heel and headed into the kitchen to make herself some breakfast, and made some coffee. Without even thinking she made enough for two – Jasper had never been a coffee person, and so she was accustomed to making just a cup for herself. But Raven was also very observant, and Anya’s earlier comment about really needing coffee had stuck with her.

“Morning. Made some coffee.” Raven said when Anya came out of the shower.

“Morning. And thanks.”

Anya slipped away into her room without another word. Not that Raven really minded; no, she went into the bathroom and locked herself in, and stepped in for a long and hot shower. She washed her hair thoroughly, and spent a long time just standing under the stream of hot water, eyes shut and focusing on her breathing. It was going to be a long day, and her headache had to go away if she wanted to have a good one.

She heard the front door open and shut, and figured Anya must’ve left for work. Sure enough, when she got out, she was met with an empty apartment, an empty mug of coffee sitting in the sink where Anya had left it. Raven glanced at the clock – it was barely seven.

She pitied Anya for having such a job that required her to leave for work so early.

Her day went by as could’ve been expected – a lot of her work was monotonous and dull, consisting almost chiefly of changing oils and tires and covering up scrapes with quick paint jobs. She’d hoped Sinclair would let her work on the shoddy old Mustang they’d just received the day before, but, being a mechanic and engineer himself, he had naturally hoarded the beauty to himself.

And then she was picked up by Finn at 7pm sharp, and her night had been fun – the dinner had been great, as had the movie, but what came after left her at odds with herself, as always; Finn had insisted on going for a walk, and she hadn’t said no, and so they’d walked around for a bit, hand in hand, while Finn talked about some specs of the movie. Raven only half answered his arguments and claims, but Finn didn’t seem to notice her apparent change in mood.

His hand felt clammy in hers, but she held it despite the fact that she would’ve been more than content to just walk side by side with him without any contact.

“Look, Finn,” Raven sighed. The boy turned to look at her, and smiled, and that kindled something within Raven as it always did; he was Finn, he’d known her forever, she trusted him more than anything, and she cared for him. She truly did.

 _Maybe he just loves me way more_ , Raven thought to herself. _I definitely care about him._

“Could we slow down a little?”

“What do you mean?”

“With the whole…romance thing.”

Finn raised an eyebrow. “You want to break up?”

“No! No, I just…it’s so much.”

“Raven, we’ve been dating for years.”

“I know that, I mean that it’s all so much right now. Sinclair’s pressing me at work, and I’m just really tired…”

Finn said what Raven had expected him to. “Whatever you need, babe.”

She cringed inwardly at the word babe, but smiled outwardly instead, leaning in to press a gentle kiss to Finn’s cheek. “Thank you. You always get it.”

He really didn’t, but at least he’d understood what she’d wanted in that instant.

“Anything for you, Raven.”

 

* * *

 

A few weeks passed, and Finn began more insistent with her again. She’d been able to keep him off and at a distance for a little over two weeks, but she knew she couldn’t push him away forever. She’d pondered about leaving him, telling him she was done – but he’d been with her so long she didn’t know if she could.

The one time she’d thought she’d have the courage, he’d started the conversation by telling her that he’d been assigned the worst workload, making his life miserable for weeks on end.

So of course she hadn’t dumped him then.

She had also learned that her new roommate was not one for words. Most days, Anya was up before Raven, and gone before she got out of bed. When Raven came home, Anya was usually either holed up in the armchair reading, or in her room, reading. There wasn’t much socializing between them – Anya did respond when Raven spoke, and sometimes they watched TV together, but Raven had quickly learned that Anya wasn’t as standoffish as she let herself appear. She just had a strenuous job, and needed time alone to relax and unwind.

So Raven let her do her thing, despite the nagging curiosity in her mind to learn more of the broody woman who’d settled in to live with her. From the few conversations she’d had with her, she’d learned that Anya had started medical school, but had been forced to drop out to come back home to help raise Lexa after their single father had died suddenly. The latter part Raven had figured out on her own, having known already of their father’s early passing – Anya had just told her curtly that she’d gone to medical school and then stopped.

She'd learned that Anya was a fan of kickboxing, and had given her some tips on some good gyms in the area. Anya had been grateful for that, and sometimes they ran into one another at the gym. Though Raven had considered it, she hadn't yet dared to ask Anya if they could go workout together. There was something about Anya that kept her at a distance, a quality that made her seem unattainable - but it was that very same quality that drew Raven in, made her curiosity grow, and made it impossible for her to discard her interest in the woman altogether.

“You wanna come over to Lexa’s with me?”

Anya didn’t raise her eyes from her book, not did she give any indication that she’d heard her, not until she spoke.

“What’s happening at Lexa’s?”

“She’s been trying to reach you,” Raven shrugged. “A little get-together. A party, if you may.”

“A party.”

“Mhm.”

“And Lexa wants me to come?”

“She said she’ll die if you don’t.”

Anya turned a page. “Sure she did.”

“And besides, maybe that frown will turn upside down with an appropriate amount of alcohol in your veins. Perhaps we'll see a smile, even.”

Anya raised her eyes from her book and quirked an eyebrow at Raven. “So _you_ want me to come?”

“Haven’t seen you socializing lately,” Raven shrugged. “Gotta make sure you don’t turn into some psycho because of a lack in human contact, I'd surely be the first on your to-kill list.”

“I get plenty of human contact at work, thank you very much.”

“But this wouldn’t be work, just fun. Come on.”

“Are you just trying to get me to come so that you have a good reason to come home instead of going home with your boy?”

Raven threw her a glare. “Shut up.”

Anya rolled her eyes but set her book down anyway. “You really should talk to him.”

“It’s my business.” Raven told her.

“And not mine. Got it.”

“I didn’t mean it in a rude way, just- you really should come.”

“When’s the party?”

“Now.”

“Now?”

“Well, I gotta dress up, but yeah.”

 

* * *

 

Anya went along. Raven was glad that she did.

But soon enough Raven got absolutely trashed and went off on her own, leaving Anya to fend for herself. She considered leaving many a time, but it seemed that each time she did, Raven appeared to drag her into a discussion or another, preventing her from leaving.

She did drink some. Not much, but some, enough to be a little more at ease, especially as she stood at the sides of the party, of the tiny apartment full of Lexa’s friends, and tried to ward off any unwanted attention.

And by unwanted, Anya meant male attention. She’d opted for black leather pants and a tank top that she’d only realized upon arrival was partially see-through, showcasing her bra more than she would’ve liked. But it’d been too late to leave, and so she spent far too much time glaring at ogling eyes and trying to look as uninteresting as possible.

She’d had some mix of vodka and juice, with too much vodka and not enough juice. She’d figured she could just sip on it, but hadn’t accounted for the fact that she kept sipping – she didn’t even notice she was very tipsy till she was, and then it was too late to stop herself from feeling like she was floating.

Of course Anya retained a cool air about her, but in her mind it was a different story – her eyes scoured the room lazily, searching for someone, unsatisfied till they found her – Raven, seated in the corner, laughter spilling from her lips as Finn attempted to toss a peanut into her mouth.

Raven, eyes bright and red lips curled into a smile, having fun.

Raven.

Anya shook her head and moved away from the wall where she’d been standing for far too long, and made her way out into the hall, down the stairs, and outside into the breezy summer eve. There were a few people smoking near the steps, and so she made her way a bit further off to the side, finding a bench onto which she sat down.

It had been a dumb idea to come to the party. She didn’t know any of Lexa’s friends, save for Raven, and Raven had her own friends with whom she was having fun. Raven had her boyfriend, with whom she was having fun.

She felt alone and knew it, and sighed heavily as she contemplated leaving. Raven could manage on her own.

Anya wasn’t so sure whether the fact that her mind was circling around Raven, repeating her name, that it had somehow magically conjured her up. She was drunker than earlier, having finished up her second drink, and so she didn’t at first register that Raven was stumbling towards her till she heard the sound of someone giggling a ways’ off in the bushes. She whirled around in her seat, a little too fast, and the world became a spinning blur – and then, amidst the clearing blur, she saw Raven, doubled over, leaning against the wall with one hand, laughing to herself.

Raven stood up and straightened herself, and took a step – and almost toppled over entirely. Whereas Anya was very tipsy, Raven was very, very drunk. In her stumble, she didn’t notice Anya had gotten up and come over to help her till strong hands gripped at her arms and steadied her.

“Anya!” Raven cried. “I was wondering where you’d gonee…”

Anya huffed and led Raven to the bench, sitting down beside her. “What are you doing out here?”

Raven frowned and tugged at a strand of hair. “Breathing.”

“Breathing?”

“Mhm.”

“You seem to be having fun.”

“You don’t,” Raven sighed, leaning back on the bench. Anya tried not to pay notion to the fact that the buttons of Raven’s shirt were undone to her navel, revealing just about everything there was to see. She tried not to notice the fact that Raven’s skirt was crumpled as though it’d been raised up over her hips not a moment ago.

She did her best to ignore the slight scent of sex that Raven was giving off.

And she definitely tried her hardest to not see the hickey on Raven’s neck.

“Finn wants me to go home with him,” Raven mumbled after a while. “I don’t know what to say.”

Anya snorted. “Do you want to go?”

“Noo…”

“Then say no.”

“But," Raven pouted, "I already said yes.”

“You can say no.”

Raven let out another sigh and slumped against Anya’s shoulder, promptly startling her. “I wanna go home.”

“Button up your shirt first and then we can talk.”

Raven sighed for the third time. “I tried. Fingers not functioning at the moment. Letting the gals breathe.”

Anya groaned and pushed Raven off of herself, and promptly buttoned Raven’s shirt up without another word. Raven looked at her curiously, head tilted slightly, but said nothing. When Anya was done, Raven frowned and undid one button, and offered her a shrug as an explanation.

"No need to be so prudish," she mumbled. 

Anya just rolled her eyes and stood up.

“Let’s go home,” Raven slurred as she stood up as well. “I wanna sleep.”

“There’s no buses. We could wait for a cab-“

“Let’s walk!”

Raven was already stumbling away from Anya, but Anya caught her arm with ease, stopping her escape effectively.

“Raven, you’re wearing a flimsy shirt and it's cold.”

She wasn’t so sure why she cared so much.

“Stay here. I’ll be right back.”

She wasn’t so sure why she hurried up the stairs to grab her hoodie and what she knew to be Raven’s jacket, practically ramming into Lexa on her way out – she only gave her a quick ‘gotta go’ before she was out, and then she was back downstairs.

At first, it appeared as though Raven had left. But then, as she stepped a little further, she was startled by Raven jumping and stumbling in front of her, in a half-assed attempt to surprise her.

“Boo!”

Anya laughed and threw Raven’s jacket at her. “Put some clothes on.”

And then they set off walking down the street. Raven was slow and unsteady on her feet, and so what Anya had first estimated to be a brisk half an hour long walk was way off. After the third time that Raven stumbled and almost fell over, Anya stopped abruptly, drawing Raven into turning way too quickly and really falling over. But Anya caught her, her own head almost entirely clear now, and she turned around and crouched a little before her.

“Hop on,” she muttered. “Or we’ll never get home.”

Her breath hitched in her throat when Raven’s hands touched and then gripped her shoulders, and then Raven quite literally hopped onto her back – but she was light and small and easy to carry, and Anya hoisted her up with ease as Raven threw her arms around her neck and giggled, her voice so close to Anya’s ear it made her feel drunk all over again.

“Giddyup!”

Anya just groaned and tried not to think too much of the fact that Raven was wrapping her legs around her waist or that Raven’s arms were around her neck, or that Raven’s head was resting on her shoulder – no, she wasn’t thinking about that, or the smell of Raven's perfume surrounding her and making her feel a little drunker than she was.

It took her forty-five minutes to finally make it to the apartment. By that time, Raven had fallen asleep, her arms hanging limply around Anya’s neck and her face pressed into her neck in the most distracting of ways. When Anya began climbing the stairs, Raven stirred awake, and made a whimpering noise that made Anya’s heart twist so unexpectedly she almost missed a step.

“Where are we?”

Anya huffed and hoisted Raven up. “Almost home.”

Raven sighed. “Goodie.”

They reached the door, and Anya tried to set Raven down – but Raven laughed and wrapped her legs and arms tighter around her, mumbling something about the floor being lava – and so Anya had to maneuver the door open while still carrying her, which wasn’t as impossible as she’d first judged it to be. She then took Raven to her room and tried to drop her on her bed, but Raven refused to let go.

“Raven…”

“It’s so far down.”

Anya crouched a little and Raven finally let go, falling backwards onto the bed with a laugh.

“Lay down with me.”

“I really should sleep.”

“I wanna talk.”

Anya sighed. “But we don’t have anything to talk about.”

Raven’s hand grabbed Anya’s and yanked her towards the bed. “Please?”

Once again, Anya found herself complying with Raven’s request because of a simple please.

_This is getting ridiculous._

She sat on the bedside and waited for Raven to say something, allowing her the time to actually get a good look of Raven’s room. She hadn’t ever been in Raven’s room, and saw now that it was furnished very differently from the rest of the apartment. The living room and kitchen were very plain, with comfortable furniture and blankets and pillows scattered around; whereas the color scheme in the rest of the apartment was warm and light, with whites and blacks and the occasional colorful pillow or painting, Raven’s room was almost entirely red. She had a red tapestry hung on the wall behind her bed, and red curtains, ripped and torn, hanging from the windows; her desk was of some dark wood, filled with nuts and bolts and springs and various little tinkering projects, which also filled the shelf that was set up beside it. The bare brick wall that was opposite the bed was decorated with a few strings of twinkle lights, hanging in a seemingly irregular pattern. They were hooked up to the light switch so that when the overhead light was turned on, so were the twinkle lights.

The rug on the floor was white and soft. 

Raven’s bed was also white and soft, and big. Far too big for one person.

“Are you alive?”

Anya felt a little nudge on her side, and nodded. “Yeah.”

With a groan, Raven sat up, bringing her legs up to sit cross-legged beside her. “You’re a nice roommate.”

“Thanks.”

“Do you have any friends?”

Anya laughed at the straight-forward question. “I don’t know.”

“No, seriously, do you?”

“Does Lexa count?”

“No she's your sissy-girl.”

“Then no, not really.”

“Doesn’t it get lonely?”

Anya shrugged. “Not really.”

“You’re lying.”

“You’re drunk.”

“That may be,” Raven hummed, “But you’re lonely.”

“I guess.”

“I’ll be your friend.”

Anya didn’t answer. Raven didn’t say anything either, she just rested her head on Anya’s shoulder and sighed. “Your shoulder is soft even though it looks a boney and hard.”

Anya didn’t say anything.

“I don’t know what to do about Finn.”

Anya still didn’t say anything.

“I like him...But I don’t...”

Anya sighed, realizing this was her chance to finally satisfy some of her curiosity. She’d been watching Raven dance around her boyfriend for weeks, a boy she was yet to even see, and had grown curious as to why Raven didn’t just leave him.

“How come?”

Raven sighed and shifted a little closer, her body leaning heavily against Anya's and distracting her though process. “He’s…we’ve been friends since like the daawn of time…and he’s nice. Ish.”

“Ish?”

“We were besties. Bestest of the best,” Raven said, her words still slurring a little. “And then he asked me out and I said yes and now we’ve been dating for almost five years and I just…I like him. I like going to movies and dinner and stuff, but he always ruins it.”

“How?”

Raven didn’t say anything for a while, and Anya thought she wasn’t going to.

“He always does something nice. Like holds my hand or kisses me or…he loves me. And I just…I don’t feel that much. He kisses me and it’s nice, but it’s not mind-blowing, and the sex…”

Anya didn’t want to hear about Raven’s sex life.

No, she definitely did not.

“It’s okay, but it feels off.”

“Maybe you’ve just grown apart.” Anya suggested something to break the heavy silence that befell them.

“May-ybe.”

Silence, again. This time Anya couldn’t think of anything to say.

“Do you have anyone?”

“Me?”

“Yeah.”

“No.”

“Oh. Sad.”

“I guess.”

Anya was stiff as a plank, mostly because Raven had begun to toy with the string of her hoodie – she was so close, smelling like beer and sex and whatever perfume she wore that gave Anya shivers, and it was almost too close.

Almost.

She really should’ve pushed Raven away. She had a boyfriend, after all.

“What do you think I should do?”

“Why are you asking me?”

“You’re smart.”

Anya shrugged. “If he doesn’t make you happy, leave him.”

“But he does, sometimes…”

“He makes you uncomfortable.”

She felt Raven nod against her shoulder and a little tug on the string of her hoodie. “I guess.”

Raven was quiet now, and with a glance, Anya saw that she was no longer smiling – she was staring at her toes, which were buried in the soft furry rug that she had on one side of her bed. The expression in her eyes was pensive, her brown eyes almost black in the low light.

“But he makes me so happy sometimes,” Raven mumbled. “Clarke says I should talk to him.”

“Then do.”

“What if he gets mad?”

“Then leave him.”

Raven drew in a breath. “You’re nice, even though you act like a stone-cold bitch.”

“I suppose.”

“You are. I don’t get why you don’t hang out with people more often.”

Anya shrugged. “I don’t like people.”

Raven turned her head so that her chin rested on Anya's shoulder, so that she was able to look at her face.

“Do you like me?”

“I guess.”

“Do you want to hang out with me some time?”

“I guess.”

“Do you ever say more than five words at a time?”

Anya rolled her eyes. “I guess I can.”

“That was five.”

“Four, Raven. It was four words.”

“I’m tired.”

“Go to sleep.”

“I don’t want to.”

“Go to sleep.”

Raven sighed and sat up a little, and before Anya could even realize, she felt soft lips press a kiss to her cheek.

“For being the best ride home,” Raven mumbled as she laid down in the bed and pulled the covers over herself.

Anya shook her head and headed out of the room, the skin where Raven’s lips had touched her burning like fire.

 “Anya?”

She stopped in the doorway to look at Raven. “Yes?”

“Thank you.”

Anya smiled a little and turned the lights off. “Good night, Raven.”

“Night night,” came the mumble from amidst the covers.

Anya went to bed that night with her head spinning from the very last bits of alcohol in her veins and the feel of Raven’s lips on her cheek, the ghost of her touch lingering on her skin as though she’d left some part of her there as a memory to haunt Anya long after she’d shut her eyes to go to sleep.

 

* * *

 

 

Come morning, Raven was hungover and in pain. She spent a long while sitting on the bathroom floor, thinking she’d heave, and Anya felt sorry for her.

She didn’t have any residual effects other than barely visible dark circles under her eyes. She hadn’t drank that much, after all. But Raven had been sufficiently trashed, and now, listening to her groans from the bathroom, Anya truly did pity her.

“Do we have any painkillers?” Raven asked, throwing the door to the bathroom open. “I think my brain is staging a mutiny and is trying to walk the plank.”

Anya chuckled. “Hold on.”

She came back a while later with a painkiller and a glass of water. “Here.”

Raven groaned. She was laying on the floor, head resting against the cold tiles, and had no desire to get up. “I can’t get up.”

“Yes you can, and this will help.”

“Hey, look. More than five words.”

Anya almost blushed when she realized Raven recalled their talk from the night before. “I’ll just leave these here,” she muttered, placing the pill and glass of water on the counter.

“Hey, about what I said last night…”

“Yes?”

“Can we just pretend it didn’t happen? I was really drunk.”

“No problem.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> poor Raven, all confused with her feelings  
> poor Anya, all messed up because Raven's so adorable with her drunken mumbles and cheek kisses  
> i'm a sucker for cheek kisses they're so sweet  
> don't forget to leave kudos and comments guys, and you can find me on tumblr @clexy-polarbear


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok srsly i can't stop ranya is too good modern au ranya is TOO GOod  
> they're so pure  
> even though they're going to be not-so-pure very soon

“Hey, Anya…”

“Yes?”

Anya had only just come home from a two-day shift, and all she really wanted to slump into bed and sleep for a thousand years. But Raven looked as though she’d been waiting for her, despite it being very late, and so Anya settled on fumbling around in the kitchen while she waited for Raven to speak.

“Do you want to go to the beach tomorrow?”

“The beach?”

“Yeah.”

“With who?”

“Me.”

“Just you?”

“Yeah, just me,” Raven smirked as she hopped onto the counter. “Finn was supposed to take me but he’s got work instead. You’ve got your day off, right?”

“Raven, I’ve been up for two days. I’ll probably sleep all day.”

“You can sleep in the car and at the beach.”

“I’m not very fun.”

Raven rolled her eyes. “Come on, loosen up a little. We’ll bring blankets and a couple of beers, and-“

“No beers. If we’re taking the car, that is.”

“Fine, fine. Lemonade or something.”

“Better…”

“So is that a yes?”

Anya sighed. The thought of spending the day with Raven wasn’t an unpleasant one – though they hadn’t had a long conversation after the party almost a month before, she and Raven had grown to be what could’ve been seen as friends. They'd gone to the movies one time, and had spent a few evenings just talking casually. It wasn't so strange anymore for Anya to sit in the armchair and read, and for Raven to sit on the couch and watch TV, both in comfortable silence but still acknowledging each other's presence. 

“Sure. But let me sleep in, please.”

“I’ll carry you to the car at 8am sharp.”

“You can’t carry me.”

“Watch me.”

Anya rolled her eyes and walked towards her room, waving Raven one last ‘goodnight’ before shutting the door and falling into bed, utterly exhausted.

 

* * *

 

She was woken seven hours later, at nine in the morning, by a gentle hand nudging her shoulder.

“Up you get.”

Anya groaned. “Five more minutes.”

“I put down the backseat. You can sleep there, it’s about two hours to the beach.”

“Five minutes.”

Raven sat down on Anya’s bedside and huffed. “Nope. Lexa told me to drag you out of the house. Apparently you have been avoiding her.”

“I have not.”

“According to her, you have.”

Anya threw the covers off of her face and frowned. “At least give me privacy.”

“What, do you sleep naked or something?”

Anya didn’t answer, and Raven’s eyes widened as she jumped off the bed. “Shit. Yeah, um…I’ll be in the living room.”

She hurried out of the room, and the instant the door was shut, Anya threw the covers off of herself and laughed. She wasn’t naked – she was wearing what she always wore to bed, a sports bra and shorts, but she was glad that she’d been able to get Raven to leave without much effort.

A while later she came out of the room, clad in shorts and a hoodie, with a towel and a book and other essentials in her bag.

“Ready to go?” Raven asked with a bright smile.

“I guess.”

Raven rolled her eyes at the phrase. It seemed that half of what Anya said was ‘I guess’, and while it was annoying, it was much better than silence.

Anya did sleep most of the ride. Raven drove and listened to the radio on as silent as she dared, and couldn’t help but steal glances at the sleeping woman in the back; she was curled up on one side, almost on her stomach, with one hand grasping at the pillow beneath her head. Her hair was in a messy bun, just barely held together, and her face – well, her face was a little distracting.

Raven told herself it was because she hadn’t ever seen Anya look so serene and peaceful. It wasn't because the morning sun accentuated her cheekbones, or because there was the slight curve of a smile on her lips - no, it wasn't that.

Once they reached the beach, Raven tried to be as gentle as she could with waking Anya. She gave her a little nudge, and, when Anya didn’t at first respond, quietly said her name.

“Anya. Hey.”

Anya grumbled and sat up. “I’m awake.”

“We’re here. I stopped on the way to get breakfast.”

Anya wasn’t even surprised that she hadn’t noticed – she’d slept so soundly, the steady hum of the car keeping her in deep sleep, that Raven could’ve driven them to Mexico for all she cared.

“Where are we?”

“A little place I’ve found,” Raven smirked as she grabbed her bag and started walking away from the car. “It’s a bit of a walk.”

“How much is a ‘bit’?”

“Half a mile," Raven told her. She handed her a bag, and took the other in her hand. "Come on, it's really not that far.

The path that took them to the cove was winding and narrow – it went around a cliff, so close to the water the waves splashed at their feet – but then, as they went around the point, they came to a small lagoon, protected by cliffs on both sides, with the sunshine blaring down on the white sandy beach at it’s heart. The water was shallow, and a sparkling blue, inviting one to come for a swim – as they walked down to the beach itself, Anya caught the glimmer of silvery fish amidst the waves, and smiled.

“It’s pretty, right?”

Raven was looking at her, and smiling, and Anya couldn’t deny that she was right.

“It is.”

And then the brunette let out a laugh and ran the remaining steps onto the beach, casting her sandals off her feet and relishing the feel of the hot sand beneath her toes. Anya did the same, though in a less childish manner, and followed Raven to where she’d decided they’d set up camp – it was at the base of the only tree in the cove, a small one at that, with it’s leafy branches stretching out along the side of the cliff as though it wished to hide from the scorching sun.

“We come here sometimes,” Raven told her, “Clarke and Lexa and Octavia and I. It’s always a good time.”

Anya nodded. “Looks like it.”

“Now, do you want the mango or the strawberry?”

“Huh?”

“Smoothies. I didn’t know which one you’d like so I got two. I’ll take whichever you don’t want.”

Anya opted for the mango. “Thanks.”

For a while, they just sat there, listening to the waves crash against the shore and the seagulls crying high up in the incredibly clear blue sky. But after some time, Raven realized she was growing way too hot, and shed her hoodie and shirt without thinking twice, leaving her only in her bikini top and shorts.

It was white and had lacey details, and accentuated Raven’s tan skin to perfection.

Anya couldn’t take her eyes off of her for a long while. Thankfully, Raven didn’t notice.

“It’s so hot,” she muttered. “Thank god I remembered my hat this time.”

She put on a snapback and smirked at Anya. “Now, Frowny Princess, how about a little smile?”

Anya frowned. “I’ve smiled today.”

“I know, I was kidding,” Raven grinned, giving Anya’s knee a little nudge. “No need to be so literal.”

Anya just rolled her eyes and returned her eyes to the water.

“How are you?”

For her question, Raven received a pointed raise of an eyebrow from the woman on her right. “What do you mean?”

“We haven’t talked much. How’s life? Still saving lives, as usual?”

Anya shrugged. “I guess.”

“Geez, do you ever say anything other than ‘I guess’?” Raven laughed.

“I guess,” Anya smirked.

Raven groaned and laid down on her towel. “You’re joking now, aren’t you?”

Anya was too far in to stop. “I guess.”

“Oh my god! Can you stop?”

Anya was laughing now, and she shrugged and was about to speak – but before she could say those two words, Raven threw her hoodie at her face. “Don’t you dare.”

“You should stop asking me questions.”

“Hard to, when you’re not one for making conversation.”

Anya stared at Raven for a brief moment before turning her gaze away. “I guess you’re right.”

“It’s not a bad thing,” Raven amended, realizing she’d hit a sore spot. “Not everyone’s talkative. I get it.”

Anya just nodded but kept her gaze fixed on the rock a few feet away.

“How about you?”

Raven was surprised when Anya spoke, and so it took her a moment to respond. “What about me?”

Anya threw her an amused look. “How’s life been for you?”

The fact that she sounded genuinely interested baffled Raven the most – Anya was always so cool, emotionless at times, that Raven could count the times she’d actually held Anya’s interest on the fingers of her hands.

She let out a sigh. “Work’s good, Sinclair’s letting me work on this Harley that we got last week. It’s a beauty.”

“Harley?”

“Harley-Davidson. A motorbike.”

“That sounds fun.”

Anya saw that there was something more that Raven wanted to say – she was tense, even though that tension was slight, and she wondered about it’s cause.

“Can I talk about something?”

“Sure.”

“It’s just…Christ, Finn’s a fucking mess.”

Anya raised an eyebrow but said nothing.

“So I decided I was going to break up with him, right?”

“Right…”

“And then, when I’m about to do it, his fucking mom _died-_ “

“Died?”

“Yeah, it was sudden and awful and I feel really bad for him.”

“Sounds awful.”

“But I couldn’t break up with him then. And now he’s been gone to sort out the death stuff for two weeks, and…”

Anya glanced at Raven curiously. “And?”

“I miss him.”

What Anya felt when Raven said that could’ve been describe as something like a punch to the gut – she felt a flash of anger, but that subsided quickly, only to be replaced by nagging disappointment. “Oh.”

“I just don’t understand anything,” Raven muttered. “Maybe I’m thinking too much.”

“Maybe.”

Raven didn’t catch the coldness that had set into Anya’s voice. Had she done so, she might’ve looked at Anya and seen a scowl on her face; but she was drawing circles in the sand, brows furrowed, trying to make sense of her own head, and so she missed Anya's look of disappointment upon realizing she and Finn were still an item.

“I think I’m going to go for a swim,” Anya muttered. She stood up and shed her clothes, and Raven felt the desire to turn and look – but she didn’t. She stayed there and drew more circles in the sand, as though one of them might give her a key to unlocking her own brain – but they didn’t help, she was left just as confused as before, only now she had sand caught under her fingernails.

She didn’t understand how she could miss Finn when not three weeks before she would’ve given anything to be rid of him. She missed his smile, his laughter – she missed hanging out with him and watching movies and eating pizza, and just talking to him. She missed his voice.

_Maybe there’s hope after all_ , she thought to herself as she laid her head down onto her arms. _Maybe we can still make it._

Anya thought a dip in the sea would cool her off. But it didn’t. No, in addition to the sinking feeling in her stomach, she now had a slight headache, and the cool water was doing little to help any of it. She dove beneath the waves and tried to shrug it off, tried to forget – the water was cool on her skin, fresh and so salty her lips hurt – but it did naught to rid her of the twisting feeling in her gut.

Raven was fun. Raven was kind and smart, Raven’s smile made her stomach flip – they were all things that Anya shouldn’t have been feeling.

Raven was her roommate. Raven was Lexa’s friend, Clarke's best friend. Raven was taken.

Raven was off-limits.

She swam around the lagoon five times before getting out. She wrung the water out of her hair before making her way back to where Raven lay, evidently asleep, on her back. She averted her eyes from Raven’s barely clothed form, but even the slight glance had created a memory, now burned to the inside of her eyelids so that each time she closed her eyes, she saw her.

She laid down on her back to dry off in the sun and pulled out her book.

A chapter later, Raven woke up.

“How was your swim?”

Anya didn’t answer. She wasn’t in the mood for talking.

Raven noticed her change in mood, and though she had no knowledge of it’s cause, decided to let Anya be for a while.

“I think I’ll go too.”

Anya didn’t raise her eyes from her book, nor did she really pay notion to Raven being gone.

Two chapters later, and Raven was still gone. That was when Anya got worried, and set her book down to look at the water.

Raven wasn’t anywhere to be seen.

“Shit,” Anya muttered as she scrambled up. “Raven?”

There was no answer, and so Anya hurried over to the shore. “Raven?”

“Over here?”

Raven’s voice echoed in some cave to Anya’s right, barely audible, and she let out a huff before yelling her response. “Where?”

She didn’t receive an answer; instead, Raven popped up from under the water a couple yards to the right, and she waved at Anya to come over.

“I wanna show you something.”

Anya huffed. For a moment, she’d feared that Raven had drowned, but the brunette didn’t seem to realize that she’d been worried – no, Raven was floating amidst the waves with the brightest of smiles on her face, evidently having the time of her life, and Anya had no choice than to follow. She waded into the water and to where Raven was waiting for her. Raven’s feet didn’t reach the bottom, but Anya’s did, and so she stood there, water up to her chin, and raised an eyebrow at Raven.

“Well?”

“It’s a bit of a dive. Five seconds, ten seconds tops,” Raven explained, gesturing towards the wall next to them. “There’s a cave. Here, take my hand.”

Anya looked at Raven’s outstretched hand. “It’s harder to swim with one hand.”

“I don’t want you ramming your face into the wall,” Raven shrugged. “And I don’t think you do either.”

Anya was still hesitant, and Raven sighed.

“Come on, Frowny Princess, give it a chance. It’s really pretty.”

With a sigh, Anya took Raven’s hand, ignoring the churn of her stomach that happened when their skin touched. “Fine.”

Following Raven’s example, she took a deep breath and dove, shutting her eyes – she trusted Raven to guide her, and felt a slight tug on her hand as she swam forward, following wherever Raven went.

_One, two, three, four, five…_

Nine seconds later they surfaced inside the cave. It took a while for Anya to wipe the stinging saltwater from her eyes, and when she did gain her eyesight, what she saw was awestriking – the cave was huge, with parts of it open to air and accessible by foot, but from where they’d come, there was only a solid rock wall. The water in which they swam was bright turquoise in color, and the sunlight that reflected off the watery pools in the cave danced on the stone walls, making them seem alive, as though the stone was only a rippling fabric hung around the space they were in.

“Pretty cool, huh?”

Raven’s voice echoed in the cave, and Anya turned to look at her. “Yeah, it is.”

“Is that a smile I see?”

Anya frowned in response, and Raven splashed some water at her. Of course, Anya retaliated, and Raven laughed – and splashed at her again.

“You’re a child,” Anya huffed.

Raven splashed again. “You returned fire.”

Anya splashed back. “Fight fire with fire, right?”

“Oh, you _so_ don’t want to go down that route with me.”

“What if I do?”

Raven smirked, and then balled up her fists in a way that sent a squirt of water flying at Anya’s face. Anya cried out at the assault and dove underwater, and Raven waited coolly for her to resurface so that she could hit her again.

But then she felt a yank on her foot, and she went underwater with a yelp – water entered her mouth and nose, and when she resurfaced, she was sneezing and coughing.

Anya was laughing.

“Fuck you,” Raven grumbled, splashing towards her again. “You play dirty.”

“I guess.”

And Raven groaned. “Christ, can we ban that phrase? And don’t you dare say ‘I guess’.”

Anya rolled her eyes and swam over to the edge of the pool and climbed onto it. “We can’t ban it. If I’m not allowed to use it, I won’t ever say a thing.”

“You could say something else,” Raven suggested, following Anya’s example and climbing out of the pool. “Like just there. You said like, ten words, at least.”

“Do you really keep count?”

“That was five words.”

“Shut up.”

“Two.”

Anya rolled her eyes and flicked her wet hair towards Raven, sending a spray of water flying at her face. Raven yelped and stepped back, and stumbled, her foot slipping on the smooth rock beneath it. Anya reached her hand out to try and grab her arm, and she did catch it – but Raven's skin was wet and slipped from her grasp, and so Raven fell into the pool with a less-than-graceful splash.

For the briefest of moments, Anya worried that Raven had hurt herself. But then she resurfaced, looking pissed, and she couldn’t help but laugh.

“You bitch,” Raven grumbled as she swam back to the edge, “Bitchy bitch.”

Anya was actually laughing, her laughter echoing in the cave, and Raven realized then that she hadn’t heard her laughing like so – she froze, and paddled for a moment in the water, just taking in the sound of Anya’s sheer joy at her falling.

“If you like to see me falling so much,” Raven muttered, “We’ll see how you like this.”

She made a grab at Anya’s leg and managed to get a hold, and with one hard yank, Anya stumbled and fell face-first into the pool. This time it was her turn to laugh as Anya resurfaced with a murderous glare on her face, and she had to hold onto the edge of the pool as spouts of laughter spilled from her lips.

“God, that _was_ hilarious-“ Raven gasped. “I’m so sorry, I had to-“

Anya scowled. “You’re an ass.”

“That’s me. An ass with a great ass.”

Anya chose not to comment on that. She wasn’t sure there was anything platonically appropriate she could’ve said about Raven’s ass.

“Now, do you finally want to explore the rest of this cave?”

Anya nodded, and climbed up and out of the pool in one swift move. Raven wasn’t as graceful, and had to sling her leg over one edge and do a roll before she was out of the pool. Anya was watching her with an amused look, and Raven glared when she noticed.

“Shut up, not all of us have the biceps of a Greek goddess.”

Anya just rolled her eyes and allowed Raven to lead her through the cave, showing her the coolest places. From one side, the mouth of the cave was almost entirely open, and the wind entered the cave from there. It tasted of salt and smelled of dry fish, and Anya wrinkled her nose in disgust when they came across a half-eaten fish, rotten and left out to dry in the sun.

Raven of course picked it up with a stick and chased Anya around with it for a while till she slipped and had to cast the stick and fish off in favour of grabbing the wall to steady herself.

After they’d seen what there was to see of the cave, and sat around in silence for a while, they swam out. Raven offered Anya her hand again, but Anya didn’t take it.

“I can get myself out, I think.”

“Well, if you drown, it isn’t my fault,” Raven smirked as she dove underwater and swam off. She tried to ignore the fact that she felt hurt at the rejection, even though it’d just been her hand. Anya was just a friend, but the fact that she seemed hesitant to allow herself too close to Raven confused her.

When they got out of the water, both their stomachs were rumbling, and Anya was pleased to find Raven had packed them a whole mountain of food.

“Always good to be prepared,” Raven had mumbled through a mouthful of pizza. “Didn’t know what you eat, so I just grabbed a bit of everything.”

“More like you grabbed a lot of everything.”

“That may be true.”

Anya frowned then, for just the slightest of moments, and this time, Raven caught it.

“What?”

“Huh?”

“What’s wrong. You’re making a weird face.”

Anya shook her head. “It’s nothing, just a little headache.”

Raven immediately took her snapback off her head and handed it to Anya. “Put it on your head or your brain will boil.”

“I don’t think that’s what actually happens…”

“Put it on.”

“I can make a hat out of my shirt.”

Raven rolled her eyes and shoved the hat onto Anya’s head. “There.”

Anya moved the hat to sit better on her head. “I must look idiotic." 

“You look cute,” Raven quipped. “Well, you would, if you lost that scowl.”

Anya grumbled and took a sip from her water bottle. “Why do you want me to smile so much?”

“Not much. Just every now and then. Makes everyone a little more human.”

“I only smile when there’s reason to. Faking a smile is moronic.”

Raven nodded. “I know. That’s why I make it a rule to give people genuine reasons to smile.”

“You give people genuine reasons for a headache.”

“Oh, don’t you go blaming your headache on me when you know it’s because you didn’t bring a hat.”

“You sound like a mother.”

“Shut up.”

“And here I thought you wanted me to talk more.”

Raven laughed and threw a grape at Anya. “Talk about anything other than that.”

Anya tried to think, but came up empty. “Can’t think of anything to talk about.”

“Oh, we’ll come up with something. My genius brain can’t sit still for more than an hour at a time.”

“How about you give me that hour to nap?”

Anya slept, and so did Raven. When she woke, she read, and Raven turned over to start sketching out some designs in her notebook. Anya glanced over every now and then to try and peek at what she was doing, but never quite figured out what it was she was drawing.

“It’s a prosthetic arm,” Raven explained, “For kids. A robotic arm.”

“Aha.”

“It’s just so hard to figure out this one junction…” Raven muttered, returning to her sketching. “Shit, where’d my eraser go?”

There was a moment of panic till Raven found it hidden in her bikini where she’d put it not two minutes ago. Anya had noticed, but hadn’t found a way to tell her where it was without revealing that she’d taken a glance at her chest.

They swam again, both together and on their own. They napped again, and soaked in the warm afternoon sun. Raven went off to explore the cliffs for awhile, and though Anya tried to deny it, she spent most of that time watching Raven like a hawk as she climbed the rocks and teetered dangerously close to the edge. She couldn’t for the life of her understand why Raven was so fascinated with risking her life, and could even less figure out why she felt a drop in her stomach with each stumble of Raven’s posture, with each slip of her foot - even the slightest hint of Raven falling was enough to have Anya gripping her book the slightest bit tighter, as though that were to help Raven to regain her balance.

When Raven climbed down to a cliff, Anya almost knew what she was doing. When she took off her sandals, Anya definitely knew what she was doing, and sat up, a protest building in her chest. But before she could say anything, Raven had moved to the edge and jumped off.

“Geronimo!”

She fell the thirty or so feet with a surprising amount of grace, but Anya’s stomach felt as though it were falling as she watched her – too many times had she been called down to Polis city’s lake to gather the injured idiots who’d decided to go cliffjumping without knowing what lay underneath.

But then Raven popped up from the water, and swam to the shore, looking apparently unscathed. She saw Anya’s eyes watching her, and had noticed her watching her while she was still climbing.

“Worried?”

Anya rolled her eyes. “You just jumped thirty feet.”

“I’ve done it like a hundred times.”

“You didn’t know it was safe.”

“Yes, I did,” Raven smirked. “I’ve done that same jump a hundred times.”

“Try not to scare me shitless next time.”

“Aw, you care-”

“I can’t cover rent on my own, now can I?”

And then the afternoon turned over to evening, and the sun set – it became a little chillier, but neither of them really felt like leaving quite just yet. Anya had learned that Raven was the master packer – not only had she brought enough food to feed an army, she’d brought a blanket, knowing it’d be cold.

Raven wrapped the blanket around herself and sighed, resting her back against the stone wall behind them, while Anya just sat cross-legged on her towel, eyes fixed on the horizon.

“The sun’s setting,” Raven said. She sounded drowsy, and in the light of the setting golden sun, she looked like it too. They were both tired, their skin still hot from the blaring sun, their bodies adequately exhausted by all the swimming – it was growing quiet, the steady lapping of the waves almost lulling them to sleep, and for a moment, Anya felt content.

But then she shivered. She hadn’t dressed for the cooler evening, having only worn shorts, a tank top, and a hoodie. During the day, it’d been fine – but now she was growing cold, and Raven of course noticed.

“C’mere,” she muttered. “There’s enough blanket for the two of us.”

Anya glanced over her shoulder. “I’m fine.”

“You’re shivering.”

“It’s fine.”

“Just come here, you stubborn bitch.”

Anya sighed and shuffled a ways’ backwards, so that her back rested against the wall. She still kept a slight distance between her and Raven, but Raven closed the distance as she shuffled closer and helped her wrap the other half of the blanket around her.

“There. Warm?”

Anya nodded but said nothing more. Raven was leaning against her, and it was reminding her of the time she’d helped her home from the party.

She still remembered the touch of Raven’s lips against her cheek.

Just thinking about the memory sent a chill down Anya’s spine, and she groaned inwardly.

_This is ridiculous. She has a boyfriend._

“Today was fun, wasn’t it?” Raven asked. Their shoulders were touching, she was leaning against Anya just slightly – but her head rested against the wall behind her, her eyes were shut, her hands holding the blanket around her as she focused on the sound of the sea before her.

“It was.”

Neither of them were in a hurry to answer the other.

“Do you wanna do something like this again, sometime?”

Anya really shouldn’t have said yes.

“Yes.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this might be the most pleasant mental imagery i've ever created. i felt all sorts of happy writing it.  
> finn is a mess but bear with me ok drama must happen in order for shit to be good


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> theres a lil bit of smut just a fair warning

They came home very late that night. They’d stayed on the beach till it’d grown dark, and Anya had offered to drive the way home. Raven had declined – it was her car, and she’d invited Anya to come along, so it was only fair that she drive.

Halfway home, however, Anya told Raven that she let her at least drive half the way.

“Your eyelids are literally drooping,” she said, eyeing Raven carefully. It wasn’t like she’d spent the past hour looking more at Raven than she probably should’ve. “Seriously, I don’t want you to drive off the road because you can’t keep your eyes open.”

"Fi-ine."

Raven pulled over on the side of the road and got out of the car. They were pretty much in the middle of nowhere, with no other cars or civilization in sight. The stars were out, shining bright against the dark black of the sky, and she stopped to lean against the hood of the car and look up.

“Raven?”

“Huh?”

“What are you doing?”

Just then, Raven caught sight of a star moving. “Look! A satellite.”

Anya looked up. “I can see that.”

“Can we stay here for a while? I haven’t seen the stars in forever.”

Anya shrugged and leaned against the hood of the car, arms crossed across her chest. They sat there for a while, watching the stars, and the fact that the situation was all-too intimate and romantic wasn’t lost on Anya. She kept her distance and forced herself to keep her eyes on the stars instead of the brunette next to her, but couldn’t help but steal one glance.

Raven looked so overjoyed, the stars reflected off the dark of her eyes, her lips were curved into a smile of sheer awe that made butterflies erupt in Anya’s belly. She groaned inwardly and looked back away again, and the movement drew Raven into looking at her instead of the sky. What she saw was a shy smile on Anya’s lips and Anya’s eyes fixed on the ground before her, her hair fallen to frame and partially conceal her face.

She drew in a breath when she realized that she was still staring a moment later, and sighed. “Right. We should get home.”

“Right.”

Raven dozed off during the drive despite doing her best not to. When they came home, Anya gave her a pointed jab in the ribs, waking her up with a yelp.

“I call dibs on the shower,” Anya told her as they walked up the stairs.

“Hey! You can’t do that!”

“I did, and don’t you dare-“

But Raven had already darted up the remaining stairs and to the door. “I promise I’ll be quick, I just need the salt off of my skin,” she called out her as she slammed the bathroom door shut.

Sure enough, not five minutes later, the bathroom was free again, and Raven slipped away into her bedroom. She fell into bed without bothering to put on any clothes, and felt it was too hot to pull on the covers. She fell asleep like that, sprawled out on the bed, her skin still damp and her hair smelling of the ocean, her entire body content and warm and entirely spent.

 

* * *

 

_The kiss is as hot as it is rough, her lips claiming Raven’s mouth with a force that is just a sliver from bruising. Her hands pinning down her wrists are firm and strong, her hips grinding against her own almost hypnotic in their rhythm; a whimper escapes Raven’s lips when she moves her knee in between her thighs and presses down, reminding her of the agonizing throb of her sex._

_“Please…”_

_She's whimpering, pleading, begging for more, but the woman only kisses her again. She grinds her knee against Raven and silences her whimpers with a kiss laced with passion and a tongue tipped with the taste of sex, and Raven can barely think coherently as she feels another wave of pleasure blast through her veins as the slow grinding reaches a rhythm._

_**Her** voice is dripping with lust and confidence when she chuckles and says, “Not yet, Raven.”_

_Raven whimpers again._

_A hand slides down along her neck, long, slender fingers running along her skin, short nails digging into skin just enough to give the hint of pain. Her other hand is cupping Raven’s breast, massaging and grasping and toying with her nipple, rolling it between a thumb and forefinger, pinching every now and then to draw gasps from Raven. Her lips are now on Raven’s neck, kissing and sucking, and then, a bite splits Raven’s breath into a quiet whine of pure need._

_“Please…”_

_Another bite, another whine._

_Another grind, another moan._

_It’s hot in the bed, Raven can see a slight sheen of sweat on her skin, and knows she looks the same – but she can’t care for nothing other than the hand that has moved away from her breast to sneak down along her stomach, she can’t think of anything other than giving herself to **her** completely._

_When her hand touches her center, she stops thinking. Her mind goes blank, and right before it does, one last plea escapes her swollen lips._

_“Please, Anya-“_

 

* * *

 

Raven woke with a gasp, darting up in her bed. Her heart was pounding in her chest, and she was sweaty and hot in more ways than one. The throb between her legs was almost painful in it’s magnitude, and she let out a whimper as she laid back down on her bed, realizing what had just happened.

“Ah, fuck,” she groaned, turning over to her stomach, burying her face in her pillow. “This can’t be happening.”

A fleeting memory passed through her mind, a memory of Anya’s fingers slipping inside her, and she had to bite her tongue to suppress the moan that tried to sneak it’s way out of her throat. But it wasn’t a memory – it had been a dream, it wasn’t real, it _couldn’t_ be real.

It was still early morning, and still dark in her room - she could only barely see the clock on her nightstand, telling her it was only a little past three in the morning. 

“Fucking shit.”

She didn’t need to test to know that she was turned on, but after a while of just catching her breath, she flopped back to lay on her back and gave it a try.

She’d expected to find herself wet, and so when she dipped her fingers in between her legs and found dripping, soaking heat, she let out a surprised gasp. When she shifted a little in the bed, she felt there was a wet spot on the sheets beneath her, and had to get up to check it wasn’t blood – but it wasn’t, it was definitely not, she was just _that_ turned on.

Never in her life had she been dripping like this.

 _Holy fucking Jesus_ , Raven thought to herself, _this is insane._

At first she didn’t even realize her fingers were still toying with herself, not until suddenly she felt a wave of pleasure course through her veins – and then it was too late to stop.

She finished herself off in record time, her mind a mess of memories of Anya’s hands fucking her and Anya’s lips on hers and Anya’s body against her own.

She almost moaned Anya’s name when she came, but didn’t – she bit down on her tongue and kept herself silent, and the instant the pleasure hit, she was back asleep, knocked out cold by the sheer intensity of her pleasure.

The next morning, when she saw Anya, she blushed without even realizing. She spent the day forcing herself to forget about it, forcing herself to forget about how good it’d felt to just _imagine_ Anya doing all those things, how just fucking herself to the thought of Anya had been infinitely better than Finn ever had been, or could be.

No, she pushed that down, for one simple reason – she was her friend. She was her roommate.

It wasn’t smart, and besides – she had a boyfriend.

 

* * *

 

Finn came back three days later.

Raven was actually happy to see him.

Anya wasn’t happy about it, but said nothing of it when the floppy-haired boy showed up at their door and asked for Raven.

“She’s in her room,” she’d muttered.

Finn had gone to Raven’s room and Anya had heard a happy cry a moment later.

She’d grabbed her jacket and running shoes and left before the reunion got unbearable.

Raven had heard the door slam shut and known it was Anya, leaving – but she’d been too preoccupied by Finn, her arms thrown around his neck and her face pressed into his shoulder, breathing in his scent, that she hadn’t thought twice about it.

“I missed you,” Finn had said, and for the first time in a long time, Raven hadn’t felt uncomfortable.

“Missed you too, Floppy Disk,” she’d muttered.

And she’d smiled into his shoulder, because it was actually true.

Finn had laughed and then he’d kissed her, and for a fleeting moment, it had felt like how it had five years before. Back when he’d still called her Wack-o and they’d still had playful wrestling matches that didn’t end in neck kisses and sex. Back when they’d been happy and Raven had loved him with all her heart.

“Let’s go for a walk,” Finn had suggested. And Raven had said yes.

They’d wandered around in the park, and Finn hadn’t spoken – Raven saw and knew he was still sad, and rightly so; she enjoyed this, walking around, not talking but just being together.

They’d run into Anya – or Raven thought it’d been Anya, at least from the glimpse she’d caught before she’d turned on her heel and run off.

When she’d come home, Anya had been in the shower.

The next morning when she woke up, Anya had already gone to work.

Anya didn’t need to ask to see what was happening. Finn was back, and through some miracle, so was his relationship with Raven. The first time she came home to find them sitting on the couch, Finn’s hand resting on Raven’s thigh as though it belonged there, she’d felt a little sick. But Raven had greeted her with a smile, and so Anya had pushed her thoughts aside and hurried to her room.

Raven had a boyfriend.

Raven was off-limits.

Besides, Anya understood. They’d been together for five years. It wasn’t so easy to cast that away, not when it was someone who Raven had known for so long – from what she knew, Raven and Finn had known each other since kindergarten, and had been best friends ever since.

So what if it hurt a little each time she opened the door for Finn and saw him go straight to Raven’s room.

It was easy enough to pretend she didn’t know what they were doing. A run always helped to clear her mind.

She was running a lot nowadays.

These days, she was almost always sore. But she didn’t mind.

There was a nurse at work who’d been eyeing her for quite some time. Anya had always discarded her smiles and coy eyes, ignored them almost completely. She’d told herself it was simply because she wasn’t interested, but that much wasn’t true – the nurse, Niylah, as she soon learned, was pretty and nice and didn’t talk as much as Raven did. She was older, too, Anya’s age at least, and more mature. She had dirty blonde hair that she usually kept in a braid, and somedays she had a pin on her scrubs that said: “don’t tell me to smile, I haven’t had my daily coffee”.

More to the point, she was nothing like Raven, and so she was a good enough distraction.

And so Anya didn’t think twice about it when she went over at the end of her shift and gave her a smile and a few flirty words before asking for her number.

“Took you long enough,” Niylah said.

Anya just smiled and took the piece of paper. “I’ll call you.”

“Or we could just go now? My shift ended fifteen minutes ago.”

Anya furrowed her brows. “Did you wait for my shift to end?”

The blonde smirked. “Perhaps.”

Anya wasn’t too charmed by the gesture, but she smiled nevertheless. “Well, if you’re willing to wait for me to change out of my uniform, then we could go grab a cup of coffee?”

Niylah smiled. “I’ve got a great coffeemaker at my place.”

And so, about an hour later, Anya had Niylah pinned down in a bed, naked and completely surrendered to her; she’d come back for coffee, and they’d exchanged a few words – but then Niylah had leaned over and kissed her, and Anya had almost liked the bold gesture.

And then kisses had turned to sex, and she had shed any other thoughts in her mind to focus on the woman before her. Niylah had a tattoo of a bird on her ankle and a navel piercing, Niylah smelled of hand sanitizer and fresh coffee. Niylah had a copy of Jane Eyre resting on her nightstand and seemed to have an interest in knitting judging by the sewing basket in the corner. Niylah moaned Anya’s name when Anya thrust her fingers into her and swirled her tongue around her clit.

Niylah was real and Niylah was uncomplicated.

Niylah wasn’t Raven.

 Niylah didn’t even stop to think before she’d moved down to return the favour to Anya, and Anya let her do so. She shut her eyes and tried to relax, tried to think of something to help her tip over the edge, but that proved to be a challenging feat.

She tried her hardest to not think of Raven, but in the end, couldn’t help it – just the sheer fleeting _idea_ of it being Raven instead of Niylah in between her legs sent a shudder running through her entire body, and when Anya found herself imagining what it’d be like to run kisses down Raven’s stomach till she met eager wetness and heat, she couldn’t help but moan.

That thought, the thought of fucking Raven, that was what sent her over the edge. She came quietly, only forced out a little moan to tell Niylah she’d come, but in her mind she was elsewhere entirely.

Raven may have been off-limits in real life, but in her thoughts, she was not. Though it felt perverse and a little wrong to think of her so, Anya couldn’t help that the thought of fucking Raven caused her sex to throb with want and need. She couldn’t help that the memory of Raven’s lips on her cheek made her entire body feel hot, she couldn’t help that the thought of having those lips meet her own made her stomach twist in a thousand knots.

“What are you thinking about?”

Anya was still laying in bed, and hadn’t yet said a word – Niylah was laying beside, her, on her side, a slight smile playing on her lips.

Anya forced a smile onto her own lips and shut her eyes. “Nothing,” she sighed. “Nothing at all.”

 

* * *

 

“So, how’s Finn?”

Raven actually smiled when Clarke asked that, and took a sip of her coffee before answering. “Things are good again, I think.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

“That’s great,” Clarke smiled. “But what changed?”

Raven sighed. “I don’t know. It’s just…I’ve known him for such a long time, right? He’s been there for me for so many things, like my mom- anyway, he’s my best friend first. And we talked about it, and he was so understanding…we’ve been together for a long time. Of course there’ll be rough patches, but it’s worth fighting for.”

Raven tried to ignore the nagging desire to voice the question bouncing around in her mind.

_It’s worth fighting for, right?_

But then she saw Clarke smile, and felt validated, and the question slipped away from the tip of her tongue.

“Finn’s a good guy. He…you two seem happy again. It’s nice.”

“Yeah, it is.”

“Now, onto other matters...”

“Hm?”

“Before I say this, you have to know that Lexa put me up to this, ok?”

“Okay…?”

“Is Anya seeing someone?”

Raven felt a weight descend on her chest when Anya was mentioned, but shrugged it off. “I think so, yeah. Why?”

“Lexa’s noticed Anya being more reclusive than normal, and heard a rumor.”

“Well, yeah. I think she’s seeing someone.”

The words tasted vile in Raven’s mouth, but she shrugged those feelings away. She had no right to be jealous of her friend.

“Who?”

“I don’t know her name, but I think she’s a nurse.”

“A nurse…and they’re actually going out?”

Raven shrugged and toyed with the lid of her cup. “Well Anya’s spent a lot of nights sleeping elsewhere. So I guess?”

Clarke smiled, and Raven knew she should’ve too – but she couldn’t bring herself to do so, though she wasn’t quite so sure why. She had no right to be jealous of Anya. Anya was her friend, and she wanted to see her happy.

“Lexa will be happy to hear that,” Clarke sighed. “Anya hasn’t had much going on for her like, ever.”

“So, wait…” Raven hesitated for a moment, but when she saw Clarke’s raised eyebrow, she knew she had to continue lest she wanted to remain unsuspicious. “Is she gay?”

“Yeah.”

“Like Lexa.”

“Yeah.”

“What are the odds?”

Clarke laughed. “I don’t know, but slim at least.”

And Raven laughed too. “I just hope I never run into her scissoring on my couch.”

“You do know that’s not a thing, right-?”

Raven rolled her eyes. “Of course I know it’s not a thing, Clarke.”

“Now why does your tone of voice suggest you’ve got personal experience…?”

Raven shrugged and blushed. “Shut up.”

Clarke gasped in surprise. “Raven, this is new!”

“Clarke…”

“I’ve never heard of this.”

“Shut up.”

“Tell me.”

“No.”

“Raven…”

 “Okay, fine, maybe I dated a girl in high school, briefly, before Finn.”

“Before-? I thought he was your first.”

“He was my first boy, yeah…”

“Does he know?”

“No.”

Clarke chuckled. “So he thinks he’s your first?”

“Yeah.”

“Whoa.”

“It’s not that big of a deal. We were young and had no idea what we were doing so I’m not even so sure it’d count as sex…” Raven tried to amend, but Clarke didn’t pay much attention to what she was saying.

“But with who? We were in the same class!”

“I can’t tell you.”

“Why not? Is she not out?”

“I can’t tell you.”

“So she _is_ out,” Clarke concluded. “Okay, so it’s either Ontari or Harper. Please don’t tell me it was Ontari, she’s a bitch.”

“It wasn’t Ontari.”

“So it was Harper?”

“Shut up. It was brief. Two months, tops.”

“Two months!? How did I never find out?”

“As I recall, you were preoccupied with pining over the new girl in town and wanting her girlfriend dead.”

Clarke frowned. “It’s not like I wanted her dead…and I wasn’t that obsessed with Lexa.”

“Clarke, you went to every single one of her soccer practices. When she and Costia broke up, you almost declared it a national holiday.”

“I did not, and for the record, I was drunk when I found out.”

“I know. I’m the one who had to pin your drunk ass down so you wouldn’t run off to find a newly broken-up and free Lexa to declare your undying love to her.”

Clarke scoffed. “I wouldn’t’ve done that.”

“Yes, you would’ve.”

“No, I would not have,” Clarke muttered into her cup. “Besides, it took me like a year from there to even get her number.”

“That’s because every time you tried talking to her, you forgot how to speak.”

Clarke gave Raven’s rib a playful jab. “Shut up. You still haven’t told me everything about your dalliance into lesbianism.”

“What’s there to tell? We dated, kept it secret, had sex – or tried to. She broke it off because of some other girl. I don’t know.”

“Did you like her? Like, are you-“

“I’m straight. I think.”

“You think.”

“She was nice, but…I don’t know.”

Clarke nodded. “I see.”

“You’re not telling Lexa any of this or I’m telling her about the time you declared that you’d marry her, before you were yet to even have one coherent conversation with her.”

“Don’t you dare.”

“Then don’t tell Lexa about Harper.”

“Fine, I won’t.”

 

* * *

 

Raven went home from her coffee-date with Clarke feeling content and happy. She stopped by the store on her way home to buy ice cream and popcorn, intending on having herself a movie night. She had intended first to go to Finn’s, but didn’t feel like doing so in that moment. She wanted to have some quiet time to herself.

 _Maybe I’ll ask Anya to join_ , she thought when she was trying to decide between cookie dough, her favorite, and rocky road, her second favorite, and Anya’s favorite.

She ended up buying both, just in case.

Her plans for a quiet night in were squashed, however, when she opened the door to their apartment to a scene she most certainly did not want to see.

Anya was sitting on the couch with a woman in her lap, lips locked and only a little clothing left on either of them. Anya’s hands were on the woman’s ass, groping and grasping, and a moan left the woman’s throat when she grinded her hips against Anya’s lap.

Raven let out a strangled noise in panic and turned on her heel, pulling the door shut behind her. She didn’t even think twice as she ran down the stairs and out of the building, immediately getting into her car without a second thought.

She sat in the driver’s seat trying to calm herself down for what felt like ages.

She wasn’t even sure why she had the need to calm down in the first place.

“It’s just cause I saw her practically having sex,” she muttered to herself. “It’s just that.”

But she knew better than that. She knew the twisting feeling in her chest was jealousy, she knew that she wanted to be the one in Anya’s lap instead of the woman whose name she was yet to even learn; she knew, and she knew it wasn’t possible.

“I’m confused,” Raven groaned. “I’m just confused. I’m with Finn. Finn’s nice.”

She started the car and drove off to Finn’s place. The ice cream was melting and needed to be put in a freezer, and she needed a distraction.

Finn was a good distraction, though she refused to admit to herself that that’s what he’d been reduced to on that occasion. They ate ice cream and pizza and watched TV, and played a game of foosball which Raven obviously won.

They fell into bed and Raven initiated what came after. She enjoyed herself and for that fleeting moment, she forgot about the way Anya’s hands had held the woman’s waist, tight and possessive. She forgot about how she’d wanted Anya to hold her like that.

But then afterwards when she lay in bed beside a sleeping Finn, she felt disgusted with herself. She wanted nothing more than to get out of bed, out of the apartment, and go home – but she knew Anya was in the apartment, most likely still with company, and Raven had no desire to run into either of them.

And so she laid in bed till morning, tossing and turning, unable to sleep for more than an hour at a time. She got out of bed early and took a long shower, scrubbing at her skin as though it’d rid her of Finn’s scent, but to no avail – she scrubbed till it was raw, but the ghost of his touch still lingered, making her feel just the slightest bit nauseous.

_Christ, this isn’t good._

She put on her clothes and left without another word, and went to the autoshop despite it only being maybe seven in the morning. Of course nobody was there, but she had her own key, and she set to work. She spent two hours sorting the ‘miscellaneous nuts&bolts’ box that had sat in the corner of the shop for ages, and by the time Sinclair showed up, she’d sorted them out into various boxes, all organized to perfection.

“What’s with the sudden spurt in productivity?”

Raven shrugged. “Couldn’t sleep.”

“Troubles at home?”

Another shrug. “I guess you could say that.”

Sinclair patted her on the back. “Well, if you ever need to, the couch in the back office is comfortable enough to sleep on. I used it back when the wife and I were having some trouble.”

Raven smiled. Sinclair was the closest she had to a father, though this father also bought her beer and played poker with her on Friday nights and called a ‘wrench monkey’. But he was kind and fatherly, and looked out for her.

“Thanks, Sinclair.”

She took advantage of his tip that night and slept on the couch in the back. There was even a blanket which she used, though it smelled mostly of motor oil and Cheetos – but it was better, she told herself, better than having to face Anya and deal with the embarrassment.

The next day she felt and looked like hell, and was glad that Sinclair chose to not comment on the fact that she wore the same clothes as she had the day before.

She considered sleeping on the couch again, but decided against it. Dragging it out wouldn’t make the issue go away –she had to face Anya, and though she was sure it’d be fine, she still felt the nagging thoughts in her head, telling her Anya might be mad or amused at her apparent embarrassment.

Anya was sitting in the armchair when she came home.

“Hey,” Raven muttered.

“Hey.”

“How was your night?”

Anya raised her eyes from her book. “It was fine. How about you?”

Raven shrugged. “Same. It was fine.”

And then she slipped into her room and shut the door, and collapsed into bed not moments later with a groan.

Anya chuckled to herself when she heard Raven’s groan, though it’s actual cause was of course a mystery to her. She’d sent Niylah home not minutes after Raven had interrupted them, but Raven hadn’t come home that night as she’d expected. She’d then figured that she’d gone to Finn’s, and had gone to bed in a sour mood.

When Raven hadn’t come home the night after either, she’d grown a little worried, if not a little jealous as well.

She’d mostly just been worried, and had even considered shooting her a text to ask where she was. She’d already had it typed out, her thumb hovering over the send button, when she’d decided against it – it wasn’t her style, she didn’t ask people how they were or where they were. She wasn’t one to care about people like that, save for Lexa. And Lexa was her sister, so she was an exception.

She might’ve been able to reason herself out of texting Raven, but she had still stayed up very late reading to try and catch Raven coming home. When she’d heard the key turning in the lock, she’d felt a little burst of joy in her chest. Even the short exchange they’d had was more than enough to have her feeling alright again, and now she sat in the armchair, her book still in her hand, and the flat felt like home again.

Of course there was the nagging feeling that hadn’t left her gut since she’d first seen Finn. She didn’t like him, not just because he was with Raven – she disliked him because he was so…flat. He was uninteresting, he was bland, and that he’d managed to keep Raven as his for so long simply baffled her.

Not to mention he looked like a coward. Anya had a severe distaste for cowards.

But there wasn’t much she could do. So far as she was concerned, Raven was straight.

Raven was, and would be, off-limits. She didn’t want to mess up her life, though the very fact of Raven’s existence made her want to contest that – it would’ve been so much easier to ignore Raven were she not so…like herself. Raven was Raven, and she was so unique and lively that Anya couldn’t help but smile at her jokes. Talking with her was easy. Talking with anyone had never been easy for Anya, but with Raven, it was. She didn’t have to force out kind words or hold words back; Raven had a quality to her that put her at ease, and Anya would’ve given anything to keep her around for the indefinite future.

Of course, that was only possible if she didn’t mess everything up by falling any more for the brunette than what she already had.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> these two pining angsty messes are adorable and this is kinda slow-burn ish but it's all worth it trust me  
> sex dreams are my weakness tbh and clearly, they're raven's weakness too...


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shit happens shit happens i LOVE THIS FFIN FIC i cant stop writing it its just coming out of me like fuckin lava

“Okay, now you’ve gotta tell me. Who’s this girl you’re dating?”

Anya raised an eyebrow at Raven. “What?”

“I’ve seen her half-naked. I know it’s not just a ‘friend’. So tell me.”

“Why do you want to know?”

Raven shrugged and plopped down onto the couch beside her. “I’m nosey.”

That much was true. Of course, her question had nothing and everything to do with the fact that she was increasingly jealous of this mystery woman.

“That you are.”

“And it’s weird between us. Tell me.”

“I’m not dating her.”

“But you’re seeing her?”

“I guess.”

“What’s her name?”

“Did Lexa put you up to this?”

“Yes, she did.”

In truth, she hadn’t. Raven was doing this of her own volition, of her own jealous curiosity – though the jealousy she refused to acknowledge, she allowed herself to be curious about her roommate’s and friend’s apparent girlfriend.

“Tell her it’s none of her business.”

“Anyaa…”

“What am I supposed to say?”

“Her name, for starters.”

“Her name’s Niylah.”

“And?”

“And what?”

“What does she do?”

“She’s an ER nurse.”

“And…”

“And I’m not dating her.”

“Is that all I’m going to get?”

“Yes.”

“Not even a little bit more information?”

Anya sighed. “She likes coffee.”

“That’s not a fact, that’s a basic trait of humanity. You might’ve as well said she’s got skin.”

“Well, she has that too.”

Raven groaned and threw a pillow at Anya. “You clearly don’t know how to gossip.”

“I just choose not to.”

“So you know how to gossip?”

“No,” Anya sighed. “Now, would you mind? I’m trying to read.”

Raven sighed and reached over to grab her latest tinkering project from the coffee table. It was a watch, which she’d pulled apart and rebuilt probably a thousand times, but once more didn’t hurt.

When she’d reduced the watch to a neatly laid out set of parts, she paused long enough to realize Anya was watching her. When she glanced at her, the woman pretended to be reading, but she knew she’d been watching. She’d felt her eyes on her, and even though she wasn’t looking at her then, she could tell that she had. It didn’t make much sense, but Raven could’ve sworn she saw the hint of a smile on her lips.

A slight smile worked it’s way onto Raven’s face, and for a moment, she hesitated before finally asking:

“You wanna do something tomorrow?”

Anya took an unfair amount of time to answer, and for that half of a minute, Raven felt nervous. She fiddled with her hands and waited, ignored the churning feel in her gut, and forced herself to sit still and wait.

Finally, Anya looked up from her book. “What would this something be?”

“Say yes first.”

“I don’t know...”

“Please?”

“Fine.”

“I don’t know, your pick.”

“I don’t know what I’d like to do.”

“A movie? A cup of coffee?”

“A movie sounds nice.”

“Great. Anything in particular you’ve wanted to see?”

Anya shrugged. “Not quite sure.”

“We could just go to the theatre and see what they have and go with that. That sound good?”

Raven chuckled when she saw Anya raise her eyebrow in a way that spoke for itself, rendering her next words almost pointless.

“And what if there’s no spaces for us anywhere?”

“Then I guess we’ll have to improvise.”

 

* * *

 

Anya wasn’t so sure why she’d gone along. Perhaps it was because she was bored out of her mind and had run out of books to read. Perhaps it was because Niylah was at work for the next two days and any other distractions that she had were unavailable as well.

Perhaps it was the fact that Raven had said please.

Nevertheless, she found herself at the movie theatre with Raven the next evening, trying to figure out what movie they should go see.

“Looks like there’s only two choices, everything else is sold out,” Raven said. “So it’s either…The Notebook or Carol.”

“God.”

“I know. Sappy romances, both of them. Though I haven’t seen Carol. Have you?”

“No. But I’ve heard of it.”

“It’s got lesbians, hasn’t it?”

Anya froze for a brief moment. “I guess.”

The way Raven poked at her side when she said that almost made her feel at ease again. “You could try some other phrase to repeat like a robot, you know.”

“I suppose.”

“That’s no better.”

“Well, which is it?”

“Do you have a preference?”

“I hate the Notebook.”

“So…Carol?”

Anya shrugged. The fact that she was about to go watch a romance about two women falling in love with the girl she was currently unable to stop thinking about was troubling her, but she was too far in to stop now. And so it ended up being that she and Raven settled in to watch Carol on a Thursday evening in August. Raven bought herself a small popcorn and offered to share, but Anya said she didn’t want any.

At some point during the movie, Raven caught Anya stealing a few pieces of popcorn, but said nothing of it.

Granted, it was strange, watching the movie with Anya sitting next to her. When the sex scene came on, Raven blushed violently, and was thankful for the darkness of the theatre and it’s capacity to hide her embarrassment. She wasn’t shocked by what she saw, no – it was just that the woman she wanted to do the same things to was sitting right next to her, and a quick glance revealed that she was looking as cool as ever, without the slightest hint of uneasiness in her face.

Though it was a gruelling choice of a movie, it was a good one – Raven enjoyed it, and enjoyed the fact that Anya was there with her, and the awkwardness that had resided over them for the past week was all but gone.

When they left the movie theatre, it was raining.

Not just raining. It was pouring water from the sky, and of course, neither of them had an umbrella.

Naturally, they’d walked the fifteen minutes or so it took to get to the theatre.

“Shit,” Raven grumbled. “Think we can wait it out?”

Anya peered at the sky. “You know how rainstorms are here.”

“Yeah. It’ll be an hour, at least.”

They leaned against the wall and sighed in unison. The movie theatre was closed now, the doors locked and forcing them to stay beneath the shelter of the building. It was a little cold, and Raven shivered, regretting her decision to just bring a hoodie instead of her jacket.

“You cold?”

“A little.”

Anya sighed. “Jump around. Should help.”

“What, and look like an idiot? No thanks.”

“Aren’t you one already?”

Raven threw Anya a surprised look. “Rude.”

“Am I wrong?”

“Shut up.”

Raven took a few steps into the rain to see how hard it was pouring before running back to the safety of the roof stretched over them. “D’ya reckon we could make a run for it?”

“Fifteen minutes of walking makes for at least seven minutes of running.”

“I go for runs, and I know you do too,” Raven smirked. “So it’s not a question of stamina.”

“It could be slippery.”

“Emphasis on could.”

“I’m not so sure…”

“Last one home cooks dinner for a week!” Raven yelled as she pulled her hood up and darted off down the street into the pouring rain. She glanced behind her and saw Anya was following her, but at a significantly slower pace – she smirked to herself and ran through the rain, focusing on herself and not so much on Anya.

Anya had guessed right that Raven would pick what she thought was the quickest route. She deliberately held back for a while before crossing the street and climbing over one small fence into an alley, cutting her distance by at least quarter a mile.

She arrived at the apartment in record time, and waited outside their door for Raven to show up.

Raven came in two minutes later, panting, her hoodie entirely wet and her hair stuck to her face. Upon noticing Anya, her eyes widened.

“What the fuck? When did you pass me?”

Anya smirked as she opened the door and stepped inside. “I have my ways.”

“Shit, and here I thought I’d beat you.”

“You can try.”

Raven groaned as she shed her wet hoodie and shirt and tossed them into the hamper before slipping into her bedroom to pull on some actually dry clothes. Anya, having had brought a jacket, only had to change her pants, and settled down onto the couch to read a little bit more before going to bed.

Raven came out of her room a while later clad in leggings and a t-shirt, evidently ready to go to bed herself. But she was a little cold, and so she put the kettle on to make herself some tea to warm up.

As she waited for the water to boil, she went over to the couch and promptly plopped herself down, laying out as far as she could, placing her feet in Anya’s lap. She’d laid like this a few times before, and Anya had been mostly fine with it. Sometimes, though, she’d been annoyed, but Raven wasn’t so phased by it.

There was a chance she liked annoying Anya a little.

“Get your stinky feet out of my face, Raven,” Anya muttered.

“I’m comfy. So no.”

“Raven…”

“They don’t stink.”

“They’re not in your face, now are they?”

“You’re delusional. My feet smell of roses.”

Anya sighed and set down her book. “Raven, I swear to god-“

“My feet are staying.”

“Take your feet off my lap, or-“

“Or what?”

Anya smirked. “You’re testing me.”

“That I am.”

And then Anya’s arm darted around Raven’s legs, locking them in place as her fingers tickled the bottom of her foot, drawing exasperated laughter from Raven’s lips.

“Anya, stop!”

But Anya didn’t, no – she kept tickling Raven, and Raven was unable to get out of her grasp – she sat up, and tried to grab Anya’s hand to stop her, all the while laughing and trying to wriggle away from the assault.

“Anya-“

“You shouldn’t have tried me.”

There were tears in the corners of Raven’s eyes; she couldn’t get away, Anya was too strong, and the assault on the sensitive bottoms of her feet continued on till she was so tired she could barely laugh. That was when she mustered up one last surge of strength, and, most likely more through surprise than actual physical strength, she somehow managed to slide out from Anya’s grasp and pin her against the arm of the couch.

“Ha. Suck it, bitch,” Raven cried happily.

Anya didn’t say anything, mostly because Raven was _on_ her, Raven’s hand was holding her wrist, Raven’s face was _way_ too close to her own face, and she didn’t know what to do. She could’ve easily slipped away, but something held her in place – it might’ve been the playful look in Raven’s eye, or the fact that her slender body leaning over Anya’s looked and felt all-too good; it might’ve just been the sheer element of surprise.

The realization of their position hit Raven like a truck, and she missed a breath as she realized just how close to Anya’s face she was. Her heart skipped a beat when she realised that one of Anya’s hands was on her hip, it’s original intent having been to push her away, now entirely forgotten.

She didn’t dare say a word.

In truth, she couldn’t have spoken even if she’d wanted to.

No, all Raven knew was that Anya’s eyes moved slowly away from her eyes, down lower, for the briefest of moments before returning to look into her eyes full of a dare she couldn’t quite comprehend.

Her heart pounded so loud in her chest she forgot about all else other than the fact that she really, _really_ , wanted to kiss her.

Anya saw Raven leaning in before Raven even realized she was doing so. When she did, she didn’t stop herself, only shifted a little to support her own weight better as she moved down, eyes now fixed on Anya’s lips; they were just slightly parted, erratic breaths leaving them, and Raven was almost hypnotized by the thought of touching her own lips to them.

She froze for the slightest of moments, her lips an inch from Anya’s, and shut her eyes to take a breath. Anya was yet to move, Anya didn’t seem to want to – her hand on Raven’s hip was relaxed, her entire body was relaxed, she was calm and ready for whatever may have come next.

She was waiting for Raven’s next move.

Raven couldn’t stop. There was a feeling in her chest, an agonizing ache, that told her that if she dared to tear herself away now, she would surely regret it. And so she dipped her head down a little more, her lips only barely grazing Anya’s, and paused.

 “Kiss me,” she breathed, her mouth ghosting over Anya’s. “Please.”

And Anya kissed her.

She closed the distance without thinking twice, engulfing Raven’s lips with her own; when she did, her stomach flipped, and the taste that quickly entered her mouth was so new and so enticing that she couldn’t help but want for more.

Raven’s mind went blank the instant Anya moved beneath her and kissed her back. Her heart skipped yet another beat when she felt it, when she felt Anya kissing her fully – it was just as she’d expected, only a hundred times better, and her head was spinning not two seconds later.

Anya shifted a little, the hand on Raven’s hip curled, holding her and moving her closer – and the kiss was no longer gentle but rough, it was hungry, demanding something that Raven was more than happy to give. She would’ve given Anya all of herself had she asked.

Anya’s tongue dipped into her eager mouth, and a shiver ran down her spine when she felt the taste of Anya's mouth fill her own. Anya’s other hand moved away from where she’d pinned it and slid around her neck, drawing her even closer, crashing their lips together and pulling Raven fully atop her. Raven whimpered when she felt that hand tighten just slightly in her hair, more from the sensation of Anya just being so close than from pain – but Anya froze at that noise, pulled away, eyes wide open, pupils dilated so wide her hazel eyes were almost entirely dark.

Anya had lost herself in the moment, in the sensation, but now, her mind was clearing of the haze, and she saw that she’d made a mistake.

“You have a boyfriend,” she growled, pushing Raven off of herself. “What are you doing?”

Raven blinked in confusion, and then remembered Finn.

A punch of guilt hit her gut, and she didn’t even try to stop Anya when she got up and stormed into her room.

She didn’t slam the door, but it wasn’t far from it.

Raven sat on the couch, her head spinning with guilt and confusion, her lips and mouth still tasting like Anya.

She’d forgotten all about Finn, and in that moment, she realized there was no use trying to repair something that didn’t even exist anymore.

Still in a haze, she got up and stumbled her way to the front door. It took her a while to get her shaking hands to work long enough to get her shoes on, and then she just grabbed her keys and rushed out.

It wasn’t till she was halfway to Finn’s apartment that she realized she should’ve maybe brought a jacket, but by then, it was too late to turn back. She drove through the rain and tried to clear her mind, but it was impossible – all she could remember was the anger in Anya’s eyes when she’d pulled away, the sheer loathing in her voice when she’d reminded her of Finn.

 _I cheated_ , Raven kept thinking, _on Finn. I didn’t think and I fucked up._

It took her a long while of sitting in the parking lot to clear her head out enough that she could get herself out of the car.

She hadn’t at first known what she’d say to Finn, but in the end, had decided to make it short. Whatever they’d had was over. She wasn’t going to talk about Anya, not unless he asked, which she knew he wouldn’t. So far as he was concerned, she was straight.

_Christ, what am I?_

That was the million-dollar question that Raven chose to save for later as she ran through the rain to Finn’s apartment. She still remembered the door code, and slipped inside without any trouble.

Each step up the stairs made her stomach churn a little more. This wasn’t just some breakup; she was going to lose her best friend, she knew that, and hated herself for allowing it to ever even happen. She regretted the kiss, but only it’s timing – she should’ve ridden herself of Finn first, she should’ve kept her head and not allowed herself to get swept up with feelings.

But it was too late now.

Raven was so caught up in her thoughts that she didn’t at first see the girl standing outside Finn’s door till she was standing on the floor. And that was when she saw them – Finn, leaning on the doorframe, arm wrapped around some girl’s waist.

Finn, kissing some other girl.

Raven’s eyes went wide and she let out a gasp, and Finn saw her.

He pushed the girl away quickly and froze in place, eyes wide with fear and surprise.

“Raven!”

Raven’s hand was covering her mouth, her eyes were darting back and forth between the girl and Finn. “What-“

“Raven, this isn’t what it looks like.”

The girl slipped past them, leaving Raven alone in the hallway with Finn. “You…and her?”

She was in shock, in severe disbelief – she was trying to reason with herself, trying not to feel disgusted, but it was hard not to. She’d seen the messy hair and the hickeys on her neck, she’d seen them kissing outside his apartment closer to midnight – there was little left to interpretation.

Finn didn’t say a thing.

“How long, Finn?”

“It was just one time, I swear.”

But Raven knew it was a lie, and from her expression, Finn realized she knew too.

“Look, Raven, I-“

“How long?” Raven growled, taking a step towards him. “I have a right to know.”

He hung his head and muttered his answer. “Eight months.”

“Eight months!? Behind my back?”

“Look, Raven, I-“

“No, Finn, you shut up. Now.”

He did, and Raven found herself incapable of any coherent thoughts. When she spoke, the words just spilled out of her with little to no coherence, but she was too tired to care.

“I came here to break up with you because I made a mistake and _kissed_ someone, because I thought that was the right thing to do- and what do I find? You’ve been having a goddamn mistress, just fucking me along for months while you were _fucking_ her-“

“You kissed someone!?”

Raven glared at him. “It was a mistake and at least I had the guts to admit it straight away.”

“Who?”

“You don’t have any right to ask that.”

“Raven, I’m sorry, I should’ve told you.”

“No, Finn. What you should’ve done was leave me, if you needed someone else on the side to satisfy you-“

“It’s not like that, she’s not like that.”

“Then what’s she like, hm? Is she the only one?”

“Yes.”

“You’re lying.”

“She’s the only one, I swear.”

“Then why do you sound like you’re lying?”

Finn groaned. “Look, Raven, you can’t act like this is all my fault.”

“But it is!”

“The only reason why I ever got with her is because I never got any attention from you!”

Raven faltered slightly. “Attention? You mean sex?”

Finn didn’t answer her, only glared at her for a moment before rolling his eyes and crossing his arms.

“So because I didn’t fall into bed with you every night, you thought it was okay for you to find some other girl to do what I wouldn’t?”

She hadn’t expected to be as angry as she was, but now, she was seething with anger. Finn was looking so ignorant, almost as though he were shrugging her off, and she half wanted to hit him over the head and tell him how much of an idiot he was.

“So, all those times you said you loved me – was that even true?”

Finn fixed his eyes on a painting on the wall. “I do love you, Raven.”

“Then how could you do that?”

“I don’t know.”

“What?”

“I said I don’t know, okay!?”

Raven groaned. “God, Finn, why didn’t you- you’ve wasted so much of my time!”

“Wasted? Didn’t we have good times?”

“Clearly not, seeing as you still felt the need to have a second girlfriend!”

“Raven, please…”

“Please what? Are you asking me to forgive you?”

“Please.”

“No.”

“Raven, I love you.”

Raven huffed. “Well, I don’t love you.”

“Rae, please-“

“Finn, it’s done. You should’ve left me eight months ago when you first felt like you needed more, because that’s what someone with actual guts does. If you’d cared for me at all, you’d have left me then. But you’re nothing but a coward.”

And then she turned on her heel and stormed off, ran down the stairs and to her car, starting off again without a destination.

“Today’s going fucking great,” she muttered.

She only had two options left to crash for the night. One was the shop, and she’d already driven there when she realized she’d left those keys back at home.

And so she ended up driving to Clarke’s place at little past midnight, and only hesitated briefly before knocking on the door.

It was answered by a sleepy Lexa, looking very confused to see her at that time. “What are you doing here?”

“I need to talk to Clarke.”

“Now?”

“Please.”

Raven trembled a little, and Lexa saw quickly that she looked like she was on the brink of tears. Carefully as she could, she wrapped an arm around Raven’s shoulders and led her inside, taking her over to the couch and sitting her down. “I’ll get Clarke.”

When Clarke saw Raven, curled up in the corner of the couch with the blanket wrapped around her, she knew something was very wrong.

She sat down next to her and waited. She knew that asking what was wrong wouldn’t help. Raven would talk when she wanted to.

“Finn cheated on me.”

It took a moment for the words to be processed, and when Clarke realized what Raven had said, she let out a gasp. “What?”

Raven just nodded and rested her chin atop her knees.

“Are you…how’d you find out?”

“Went to his place. Saw him kissing some girl. We fought.”

“Are you two…”

“I dumped him.”

Clarke sighed and shuffled closer, wrapping an arm around Raven’s shoulders and pulling her to lean against her. “Are you alright?”

Raven sighed and nodded. “I’m…yeah.”

“You sure?”

“It’s not the cheating that hurts, I- I guess it just hit me that it’s, you know. Over.”

“Mhm.”

“And then, he- he had the guts to say that it was my fault.”

Raven felt Clarke tense beside her. “What?”

“He blamed me, said I hadn’t given him enough attention or whatever bullshit,” Raven muttered.

“I’ll kill him.”

“Please don’t.”

“I will. He broke your heart.”

“Clarke, he didn’t.”

Clarke looked at Raven curiously. “What?”

“He hurt me, but he didn’t break my heart.”

“I thought-“

“I thought I loved him,” Raven interrupted. “But lately, I’ve been realizing that I didn’t. Not like…not like he did. Or pretended to. Christ, I don’t know what’s real anymore, I just didn’t want to go home and needed to talk and I just-“

“Nono, it’s okay. I’m happy you came here.”

“I kinda wanna kick him in the balls.”

“You should’ve.”

“Make sure he never fucks another girl again.”

“Serves him right.”

Clarke rubbed Raven’s arm absent-mindedly. “You’re sure you’re alright?”

“Yeah. Just feels a little empty.”

But Clarke felt Raven tremble, and knew she was lying, at least partially.

“Hey, look. We’ll get you a date, get you all fixed up, and you can forget all about that nasty Finn-business. How’s that?”

Raven shrugged. “Maybe later.”

“Yeah, later.”

They sat in silence for a while, and Raven spent most of that while tugging at a strand of hair, trying to settle her mind. She wanted to cry but didn’t, she wanted to go home and tell Anya, but didn’t – no, Anya was seeing Niylah, Anya was mad at her, Anya didn’t want to see her.

She’d fucked it up with both Anya and Finn, both on the same night.

“I just don’t know how I could fuck up so bad,” she muttered.

She didn’t realize she’d spoken out loud till Clarke shifted a little next to her. “What do you mean?”

“I just…ah, it’s nothing.”

“No, Raven, tell me. What did you fuck up?”

“Nothing. It was Finn’s fault.”

“Yeah, that’s right. Don’t you go blaming yourself.”

There was a little moment more, where they were just quiet. But then a sob racked it's way through Raven's chest, and she let go.

"He was my best friend," she whimpered as Clarke pulled her even closer and hugged her, "He was my best friend."

"Screw him, I'm your best friend."

Raven sniffled and wiped away a few tears. "He- I've known him all my life, and now- he's gone. I lost him."

Clarke nodded, and sighed. "I'd say good riddance."

Raven just cried a little more, unable to contain herself. Finn had been her best friend above all else, her oldest friend, the closest she'd had to family - and now he was gone, irreparably so, and that hurt her most of all.

Clarke knew this, and after a while, when Raven's sobs had quieted down, she pushed a hair away from Raven's face and pressed a gentle kiss to her temple. "You know you're like a sister to me, right?"

Raven let out a laugh and wiped away her tears. "You're great, you know that right?"

"Anything for family."

The fact that Clarke knew to address Raven as family, knew to remind her of how she saw her as family, proved to Raven once again that she was indeed her best friend. And so she smiled, though her chest was still weighed down by the nagging feeling of loss and betrayal, and sighed. "Screw Finn," she muttered. "I've got you."

"You do know I'm not dateable, right?"

Raven let out a half-hearted laugh. "Don't worry, I'm not trying to date you."

"I know. Lexa would murder you at the first attempt."

Raven nodded. “I'm so tired.”

"Then sleep."

"I would if you'd let go of me."

Clarke chuckled and hugged Raven even tighter for a second before standing up.

“Good night, Raven.”

Raven sighed. “Good night, Clarke. And thanks.”

Clarke smiled. "Anything for family."

When Raven shut her eyes, she recalled the way Anya had looked in the split second before she’d leaned in to kiss her, and her stomach flipped.

When Raven turned to her side, she recalled the taste of Anya's mouth on the tip of her tongue, and shuddered.

When she fell asleep, she dreamt of nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, finn's an asshole, as promised  
> and they kissed forrealsies and i love these two angsty idiots so much unfffff


	7. Chapter 7

Anya paced around in her room for probably an hour after Raven had left, just trying to settle herself down. But she couldn’t, not when she could taste Raven on her lips, not when she could still feel Raven’s waist beneath her fingertips – she couldn’t tear her mind away from Raven, she had barely managed it before, and now, it was impossible.

 _She has a boyfriend_ , Anya reminded herself, _she’s off-limits._

But she’d gone and kissed her anyway.

She hadn’t been able to resist, not when Raven had asked her to.

Not when Raven had said please.

_Kiss me….please._

Anya shuddered and punched the wall, a flash of pain running up along her hand and arm where the skin scraped against the rough material of the wall. She didn’t care, no – the little bit of pain provided a distraction, but it wasn’t enough.

It wasn’t like she’d broken skin or anything.

She couldn’t stop thinking about what could’ve happened had she not stopped. Raven had seemed more than eager to go the full distance, at least judging by how easily Anya had been able to slip her tongue into her mouth, how easy it had been to draw her closer and gain better access; Anya could still recall the slight roll of Raven’s hips when she’d pulled her closer, and groaned again as she thought of what could’ve been.

She was glad she’d stopped, but she also severely regretted it.

She had no idea where Raven had gone, and in truth, she wished she didn’t care. But she did care, she couldn’t help it, and she wished Raven hadn’t gone to Finn’s.

Or she did wish she’d gone to Finn’s, to break up with him or whatnot – but that possibility, in Anya’s mind, was slim, impossible even – and so she groaned for the third time and slumped down into bed.

She wanted to sleep, but found that she couldn’t.

And so, after an hour of tossing and turning with no success, she grabbed her phone and dialled a number she knew would pick up.

“Anya?”

“Are you free?”

Niylah sounded tired. “Yes, I just got home.”

“Can I come over?”

 

* * *

 

Raven woke up feeling like shit and with her phone full of missed calls and texts from Finn. She deleted every text without reading them and put her phone on silent. She didn’t want to hear from him.

When she entered the kitchen, she was greeted by careful smiles from both Clarke and Lexa.

“Pancakes?”

Raven smiled. “Yes, please. Sorry for waking you up so late last night.”

Clarke just shook her head as she piled a few pancakes onto a plate and handed it to Raven. “Don’t apologize.”

Raven nodded and sat down, and realized then that both Clarke and Lexa were looking at her with an odd expression.

“What?”

Clarke cleared her throat. “Rae, listen…I know it’s really fresh, this whole…Finn-thing.”

“Mhm?”

“But next Friday there’s the big party at the Ark. You still wanna go?”

Raven smiled. “Don’t be dumb. Of course I wanna go.”

“It’ll only have been a week.”

“I know. More than enough time for me to clear my head from that jackass,” Raven muttered. “And besides, it’s an annual thing. There’s no way I’m missing the Ark’s two-day shot-fest for any reason in the world.”

And then Clarke laughed, and for a moment, Raven felt much better. But then she was done with her breakfast and realized she had to go home, and face Anya, and her stomach dropped.

She went home anyway. Whatever Anya was feeling towards her, she could handle. The whole drive home she spent bracing herself for more fighting, or possibly just some awkwardness – but when she came home, she found Anya wasn’t there, and so she just sighed and crawled into her room to try and forget about everything. It was Sunday morning and she had nothing to do.

Anya didn’t come back until late Tuesday night. She came home in her work clothes, and so Raven assumed she’d just gone to work. But then Anya left again, didn’t sleep at home all week, and Raven soon came to the bitter realization that Anya was avoiding her.

She knew Anya was seeing Niylah, and that made her feel even more like shit. But she didn’t do anything about it, didn’t try to talk to Anya, because she felt she had no right.

After all, she’d been the one to ask her to kiss her when she’d still had a boyfriend. She’d messed with Anya, and it didn’t matter if it’d been half by accident.

Anya had all the right to be mad.

And then came Friday, and Raven went down to the Ark, a nightclub downtown, and got sufficiently trashed. Clarke and Lexa and Octavia were there, and they all had a great time downing as much beer as they possibly could.

She did five shots. One for each year wasted with Finn.

By midnight, Raven was so drunk she couldn’t even think straight. She was having a great time, she couldn’t remember a damn thing about Finn, or Anya – all she knew was the neverending drum of the bass and the dim lights of the club, the alcohol in her veins and the laughter spilling from her lips.

Anya had gone down to the party too, dragged down by Niylah and a few of her nurse friends. She hadn’t really wanted to go, but had gone anyway, ultimately deciding it’d be a good way to let go a little and forget about Raven.

She got drunker that night than she’d been since college.

 

* * *

 

Sunlight blared through the windows when Anya woke up. It was warm and quiet in her room, and she half wanted to go back to sleep because it was so comfortable. But her head ached in memory of all the liquor she’d downed the night before, and so she shifted a little, knowing she had to get up to get an Advil.

When she shifted, the mattress moved just the slightest bit, and that was when she realized – she wasn’t alone in her bed.

Slowly as she could, dreading the sight she’d find, Anya turned around.

What she saw sufficiently made her heart stop.

She’d expected to see Niylah, or perhaps a stranger from the club – but no.

There, on the other side of the bed, lay Raven, fast asleep.

Fully naked, on her back, the sheets pooled somewhere near her feet.

And, to make matters worse, her hands were cuffed to the headboard.

Anya just stared for the longest of moments, in shock and then starting to panic as memories returned to her.

Memories of sloppy drunken kisses and handsy grabs, of a tongue circling her nipple and lips enclosing around it, of her hands fisting Raven’s hair as Raven’s tongue lapped at her centre – and then more came to her, memories of her taking Raven’s hands and cuffing them to the bed, of her taking Raven as she pleased and Raven just giving it all; of her fucking Raven till she couldn’t even speak, till the brunette effectively passed out, laying spent on the bed, legs still spread and body completely limp because Anya had made it so.

She remembered the excited gleam in Raven’s eyes when she’d climbed over her and brought out the cuffs. She remembered the kisses, the touches, the feel of Raven shaking beneath her as she kept fucking her even through her orgasm – she remembered her begging, both for no more and for more, for all of it – and, most of all, she remembered Raven’s voice.

 _“Anya_ -”

The way her lips and tongue had carried her name in that breathy moan haunted Anya and made her stomach churn. The way her back had arched when Anya’s mouth had coaxed her through to yet another climax made her head spin, and she wasn’t sure whether she was still drunk or whether she’d just lost her mind.

Anya had passed out, too. And now she realized that Raven had slept with her hands cuffed to the bed, and quickly went to undo them, praying Raven wasn’t too much in pain from her having forgotten her so. It was a surprise to her that Raven didn’t wake when she did so, not even when she laid Raven’s hands on her chest and pulled the sheet over her to cover her up.

“Shit,” she muttered as she got up from the bed, Raven still fast asleep. “Shit, shit, fucking shit.”

Cuffs still in hand, she rushed out of the room. When she realized she had no clothes, she cursed again, but dared not return into her room – no, she just went to the hamper and grabbed a pair of shorts and a shirt, not caring that they smelled a little. There was no way she’d return to her room, not when she had a naked Raven Reyes sleeping in her bed.

Raven Reyes, her roommate, the girl she’d specifically decided she’d never touch again. Raven Reyes, her sister’s girlfriend’s best friend, her sister’s friend, Raven, who had a boyfriend – no, Anya knew very well that Raven was off-limits.

But she’d gone and had sex with her anyway, and she half wanted to wring her own neck for doing so. Her head ached, and so she laid down on the couch, let out a groan, and shut her eyes.

She wasn’t so sure how long she slept, only that at some point she was roused by the sound of gagging and heaving coming from the bathroom. Her bedroom door was open, and after a long while, Raven emerged from the bathroom, wearing Anya’s shirt and looking like she’d died. She saw Anya looking at her, and came over, and for the longest of moments, Anya panicked.

“Look, Anya, I’m sorry,” Raven began. “I took your bed. And stole your shirt. Sorry.”

Anya blinked. “What happened last night?”

Raven shook her head, looking confused. “I don’t know. I remember coming home and going to bed – I’m so sorry, I must’ve gotten the rooms mixed up. And I’m sorry I have a habit of sleeping naked when I’m drunk, that must’ve been weird for you-“

“Yeah, it was.”

“Did you sleep on the couch?”

Anya shrugged. “Yeah.”

Raven was absent-mindedly rubbing her wrists, and Anya’s stomach flipped again when she recalled the reason why they were sore.

“My arms are so sore,” Raven groaned. “Please tell me I didn’t engage in another pushup contest with Lincoln.”

Anya nodded, and Raven groaned.

“Damnit. How’d I even get home? Were you at the club too?”

“Yes, and no, I have no idea how I got home. Or you.”

Raven went her way then, and Anya was left there, the realization dawning upon her.

_Raven doesn’t know we had sex._

And in that instant, she decided never to tell her. She didn’t have the right to mess up Raven’s life – Raven had a boyfriend, Raven was probably straight anyway, and she certainly didn’t want to have to dance around awkwardly with her roommate any more than she already had to.

No, Raven didn’t need to know.

 

* * *

 

 

When Raven went into her room, she was still half in a daze, her head aching and her memories a mess. But when she walked past the mirror, she saw something, and froze.

The insides of her thighs were bruised, littered with hickeys, and it was in that instant that Raven realized that what she'd regarded as just a dream had been reality.

She hadn’t woken up when Anya had undone the cuffs, but she’d woken up a few hours earlier for a brief moment, just long enough to see Anya laying in bed beside her, naked, and for her to register that she, too, was naked – and cuffed to Anya’s bed. But it wasn't until Raven saw the hickeys, the concrete evidence, that she realized she hadn't dreamt it.

She’d been dancing at the club and she’d seen Anya. Anya had seen her, and Raven had dodged her gaze, running off to the side and outside, suddenly in need of fresh air. But Anya had followed her, and then, the next thing Raven remembered, she’d been pinned against the wall with Anya’s lips claiming hers.

The wall had been rough and uncomfortable and some guy had whistled at them when he’d walked past.

Raven had been the one to suggest going home.

They’d stumbled into a cab and hurried home, and she’d fallen trying to climb the stairs. The beginnings of a bruise on her shin told her that the fall had been hard.

And then they’d gotten into the apartment and Anya’s lips had been back on hers and everything else had melted away – there were no inhibitions, no second thoughts, just pure, unbridled need and lust, tongues tipped with alcohol and hands both sure and not; there’d been kisses and fumbling fingers trying to undo zippers and buttons, articles of clothing falling to the floor one by one as they stumbled their way to Anya’s bedroom.

Raven shuddered when she recalled how good it’d felt to have Anya straddling her, how being cuffed to the bed and completely at her mercy had aroused her to no end and made her head spin like vodka never could. She remembered how good it’d felt when she’d had Anya in a similar position, sprawled out on the bed, how good she’d tasted – Raven let out a quiet groan when she realized she could almost still taste Anya on her tongue, and all the thoughts and memories only made her want for more.

But Anya clearly regretted it, that much Raven saw – she hadn’t even mentioned it, she’d pretended it hadn’t happened.

Raven, though hurt, understood. Anya had Niylah. Anya was still mad at her about the kiss.

What Raven didn’t realize, what she didn’t even think to consider, was the fact that Anya didn’t know she’d left Finn.

She just wanted things to go back to normal, but knew very well that was impossible. She couldn’t just go back to being friends with Anya, not when she felt this much for her.

Not after what they’d done.

And so they went back to dancing around one another, awkwardly avoiding each other at all times. Whenever Raven knew Anya would be home, she slept on the couch at the autoshop. Anya didn’t realize this, she thought Raven was staying at Finn’s or Clarke’s – her own nights she spent half at home, half at Niylah’s, trying to ignore the nagging feeling in her gut, telling her to just go home and talk to Raven.

But she couldn’t mess up Raven’s life. She didn’t want to screw with her, didn’t want to get involved in that mess, and so she slept with Niylah and forced herself to forget.

On Thursday, two weeks after she’d kissed Anya, Raven finally said yes to Wick when he asked her out for the millionth time.

He’d been after her for a while, and after learning about her and Finn’s breakup, he’d been the first to jump at the chance. He was nice enough, he had a nice smile, and he’d be a distraction.

Or so Raven told herself when she pocketed her phone and headed home for the day. He’d promised to call her later, and she was a little excited for it.

 _Maybe this’ll sort it out for good,_ she told herself. _It’s just a date._

When she got home, she saw that the stairs were recently painted, and groaned when she realized she had to take the elevator.

The doors were just about to close when a hand caught them, and she groaned again when she saw it was Anya.

Anya acknowledged her with a nod and stayed in one corner, Raven in another.

The elevator doors shut, and it moved up a few feet when suddenly there was a loud clunk and it stopped altogether.

“What the…?” Anya cursed. She pressed the button, but nothing happened. Raven was already cursing every god in the universe for allowing this to happen, and when Anya finally gave up on trying to open the doors, she let out a string of curses.

“Fucking shit,” Anya grumbled. “Just my luck.”

Raven moved over to the side to look at the controls. She tried the emergency button, but it did nothing. The emergency phone didn’t work either, nor did any of the other things she tried to get the doors to either open or the elevator to move.

“Looks like we’re stuck.”

And Raven groaned for the third time, realizing then that the universe clearly wasn't on her side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a little cliffhanger to torture you guys....  
> the plot's thickening and it's getting good  
> i'm just dragging this out as much as i can because i'm a sadist and i enjoy to watch you guys suffer (jokes it's just great buildup to the eventual romance)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes im upating twice in one day it's a very ranya week for me ok  
> there's plenty of smut

_"Looks like we're stuck."_

Anya sighed and leaned against the wall, bringing her hand up to rub at her temple.

Raven just rolled her eyes and slumped down against the railing along the wall, arms crossed across her chest. “This fucking sucks.”

For a long while, neither of them said a thing.

“The super’s not back till five,” Anya muttered. “I don’t think we’ll get out anytime soon. Do you have your phone?”

Raven didn’t answer.

“Raven?”

Still no answer.

“Hey, Raven?”

“What?”

“Do you have your phone?”

“Out of battery,” Raven muttered. She really didn't want to be stuck in the elevator with Anya, not when Anya was looking all sorts of gorgeous and Raven herself was an absolute fucking mess.

"What's your problem?"

Raven just sighed and looked away.

Anya furrowed her brows. “Why are you mad at me?”

“Why? I think you can figure that one out.”

“The kiss?”

Raven looked at her blankly and said nothing.

“You’re the one who asked for it,” Anya growled. “You don’t have any right to be mad about that.”

“I’m not mad about the kiss, Anya.”

“Then what?”

“What? Really? You’re _still_ going to pretend like we _didn’t_ have sex a week ago?”

Anya faltered. “Wait…”

“It’s bad enough that you’re avoiding me like the damn plague, I can’t believe you’re even denying it happened-“

“You remember it?”

Raven shot her another glare. “Every damn thing.”

“Shit.”

“Was it really that bad?”

“No, Raven, I-“ Anya thought she was getting a headache. “I thought you didn’t remember.”

“So you just pretended like it didn’t happen? Is that it?”

Anya glared at Raven so angrily that she faltered over her own words and ended up falling silent altogether.

“I didn’t tell you because you have a boyfriend, Raven!” Anya snapped. “I figured I’d spare you that mess, but apparently, you can’t even appreciate-“

“I don’t have a boyfriend.”

“What?”

“I left Finn two weeks ago.”

Raven’s voice was quiet and Anya only barely caught it.

“Are you serious?”

“He’s not my boyfriend anymore.”

Anya just stared at Raven, wide-eyed, not sure what to say.

“Why…why didn’t you tell me?”

Raven frowned. “Why should’ve I? You were happy with Niylah, and it’s not like you really care-“

“What makes you think I don’t care?”

Anya’s voice was much lower now, quiet even – she was still staring at Raven, now with a look almost wary in it’s expression, and her eyes – they gave Raven the shivers.

Not the bad kind.

The good kind.

The kind that made heat start gathering in between her thighs, the kind that made her heart race a thousand miles in her chest.

“I- you’re with Niylah. And I just…seriously, stop looking at me like that.”

Anya didn’t stop, no – she took a step closer, then a few more, and Raven backed up instinctively, pushing herself back against the wall as far as she could. “Anya, what-“

“Don’t talk,” Anya muttered as she slid her hand around Raven’s neck and drew her in for a kiss. “Not now.”

When the taste of Anya’s mouth returned to her, Raven whimpered – it tasted strange, it tasted like home, and she instantly grabbed Anya’s waist and pulled her closer. Anya was pushing her against the wall, the railing was forcing her back into a slight arch, pressing her even tighter against Anya in a way that only helped to make Raven feel weaker at the knees than she already did. Anya’s other hand trailed down along her side to rest on her hip, her grip tight on Raven’s hair as she pushed her head against the wall and tore her lips away from her for a breath.

Raven was breathing heavily, afraid to move, staring at her and waiting for what she’d do next. She was praying she’d keep going, that she wouldn’t stop, but dared not ask for it. She saw Anya was looking at her, pupils dilated and eyes full of hunger, lips parted just slightly as though she were about to say something.

“Is this…” Anya began, brows furrowed slightly, and she swallowed before continuing. “…ok?”

Raven rolled her eyes and grabbed Anya’s waist with her other hand, pushing her forward and into the opposite wall, claiming her lips with demand. “Didn’t you say we shouldn’t talk?”

Anya hummed and let Raven pin her down, let Raven’s hands keep her in place as Raven’s lips kissed her own. And then she felt Raven’s tongue poking at her lip, and parted her lips, allowing Raven even deeper and almost moaned at the touch of Raven’s wet tongue against her own.

When she realized Raven’s hand was trailing down to her jeans, she grabbed it and suddenly flipped them over, pushing Raven into the wall with such force she let out a wince of slight pain. When she heard the wince, she drew back, but Raven’s hand grabbed her wrist to stop her.

“I’m fine,” Raven growled, pulling Anya back to her. “Don’t go.”

Anya grinned and leaned in close, her body trapping Raven against the wall. Her knee she moved to push against Raven’s groin, the pressure causing Raven to jump and let out a quiet moan.

“You want this, huh?” she murmured as she dipped her head down to kiss Raven’s neck. “Don’t you, Raven?”

Raven’s hand grabbed Anya’s hair and pulled her back up for a bruising kiss. “Please.”

Anya just hummed and leaned against Raven, the feel of her body against her own making her stomach twist in a thousand knots. She was slender and just the slightest bit shorter than her, her waist was so small Anya could almost wrap her hands around it – her neck, enticing and smooth, was almost too irresistible, and as she trailed kisses down along Raven’s jaw and to her neck, Raven wrapped a leg around Anya’s waist and drew her even closer.

Anya slipped her hand into Raven’s leggings and, without another word, into her underwear to find them almost entirely soaked. She grinned when she felt Raven’s hips buck against her hand as she slid over her clit, already coated in slick arousal. When she slid two fingers into Raven, she bit into her neck at the same time, just the tiniest nip – but the moan that left Raven’s lips at that moment was more than enough to drive Anya mad.

“Fuck,” Raven cursed when she felt Anya’s fingers curl inside her. “Anya, please, just-“

Anya pushed Raven’s head back against the wall with her free hand, wrapping it around her neck, so that she could see her - and shoved her fingers straight into Raven’s sex once again.

“Please what?” She asked innocently as she kept fucking Raven, drawing a combination of breathy curses and gasps from her lips. “Do answer...”

Raven’s eyes were shut, Anya’s lips were on her neck and Anya’s hand was running along her side, fingernails dragging along exposed skin and causing goosebumps to rise wherever they’d been. Anya’s fingers were pounding into her at a relentless pace, she couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think – all she could was whimper and surrender herself, let Anya do as she pleased, and the thought of that only made her pleasure grow.

“Anyahh…” she breathed. “Ah, shit-“

Anya grinned against Raven’s skin and wrapped her free arm around Raven’s thighs when she felt her legs were about to give way. Raven barely even noticed it when Anya lifted her up, pinning her against the wall so that she partially sat on top of the handrailing, legs wrapped around her waist and body pressed into her own. Her palm was hitting Raven’s clit with every thrust, her fingers fucking her almost to oblivion – it wasn’t just that what Anya’s hand was doing was amazing, no – it was the fact that Anya was so close, that Raven had her arms wrapped around Anya’s neck and her face pressed into her shoulder, the fact that she could feel Anya’s breath on her skin and her body against her own, it all made her feel like she was going to lose it. It was intoxicating in ways Raven hadn’t ever even known a person could be, she was addicted and could only beg for more – and beg she did.

“Anya, please-“

Anya returned her lips to claim Raven’s mouth as she kept her pace steady, feeling Raven quiver beneath each thrust. She could feel Raven’s arousal coating her hand, could feel her muscles clenching around her fingers - she was nearing a climax, Anya could feel it, and could definitely hear it from the whimpers and moans spilling from Raven’s mouth into her own.

“Go on,” she murmured against Raven’s lips, “Cum for me, Raven.”

_Raven_.

It hit her in that moment that it was Raven whom she was fucking. She was completely sober, completely in command of herself, and Raven was completely in command of her own – everything was clear, it was no dream, no, this was real. She had _Raven_ in her arms, Raven, who she’d admired from afar for so long – Raven, who she’d convinced herself was unattainable.

Raven, who she’d decided she couldn’t have.

“Raven,” Anya murmured, her voice only a breath.

She hadn’t ever considered it before, but Raven’s name was beautiful. It fit Anya’s mouth perfectly, rolled off her tongue like water, as though she’d been saying it all her life – it left a warm feeling in her chest, just the sheer act of saying Raven’s name was half as nice as the girl herself.

Raven’s arms tightened around her when she heard her name, and Anya seriously considered she’d ever felt anything better in her life. She wanted that moment to last forever, to linger in that grey area between real and not, to forever see and feel the passion and desperation and unbridled need Raven had for her in that instant – but she saw and knew Raven was close, too close, Raven needed this release, and Anya was more than happy to give it to her.

When she thrust her fingers into Raven once again, Raven whimpered and crashed her lips against Anya’s again, drinking in her essence with a desperation that almost made Anya forget who she was and what she was doing. Raven’s pleas were no longer verbal, no – they were spoken through the intensity of her kisses, spelled out on the tip of the tongue that dipped into her mouth, written out with the lips that moved against her own in ways that Anya never knew could make her feel so weak.

She watched Raven come undone before her, on her fingers, and was absolutely in awe of what she saw - when Raven came, she froze for the slightest of moments, then let out a whimper – and then her grip of Anya’s shoulders tightened, and she buried her face into Anya’s neck, her hips grinding against Anya’s hand until she couldn’t take it anymore.

That was when Anya withdrew her hand, but did not move away – she stayed there, one arm still wrapped around Raven’s waist, and waited. Raven was leaning against her, Raven in her arms, face still hidden in the crook of her neck, her exasperated breaths tickling Anya’s skin as she tried to regain herself.

The elevator made a loud thunk again, and slowly, an electrical whirring sound signalled that they’d begun moving back up again. A moment later the elevator doors dinged, and opened.

“We should…” Raven murmured, but her mind was a haze. Words were lost to her, their meanings slipping away from her, as though they didn’t matter.

Anya knew what she was saying nevertheless. She hoisted Raven up, moved her lips back to Raven’s neck, and as she walked the few steps to their door she continued kissing her skin, feeling as though she couldn’t stop.

She pinned Raven against the door to free one hand long enough to get her keys from her back pocket, and, with some difficulty, managed to open the door and get them both inside. Raven was kissing her again, hand gripping at Anya’s hair and guiding her mouth to meet her own, and Anya could only barely think.

The bedroom seemed too far for her legs to carry, and she half stumbled her way to the couch, sitting down so that Raven ended up straddling her lap. The fall to the couch caused a little yelp to escape Raven’s lips, but, upon finding herself in Anya’s lap, Raven was more than content.

“You got me off,” Raven murmured, her energy finally returning to her, “Now how about I return the favour?”

One of Raven’s fingers pushed Anya’s chin upwards so that she could kiss her lightly before moving to trail kisses down along her jaw and neck, her fingers unbuttoning Anya’s shirt button by button.

Anya shuddered at the sheer confidence Raven exhibited. Before she even knew, her shirt was off, tossed to the side, leaving her only in a bralette that Raven spent a long while admiring.

“You’re sure dressed up,” Raven murmured as she returned her lips to Anya’s. “You had a hot date?”

Anya frowned and sought out Raven’s lips. “Let’s not talk about that.”

A weight descended upon Raven’s stomach when she realized she’d been right. “Wait, wait,” she paused, pushing Anya back against the couch. “What about Niylah?”

“What about her?”

“Are you seeing her?”

“No.”

“You’re not lying?”

“Why would I lie?”

“So you’re not seeing her?”

Anya raised an eyebrow. “You sound jealous.”

Raven grumbled and kissed Anya before muttering a quiet “maybe I am” into her mouth. The fact that she was kissing her made Anya forget about everything else, and until Raven moved away from her mouth to occupy herself with Anya’s neck, Anya was all but hers for the taking.

When she did regain her senses, she began to explain.

“She was a distraction,” she breathed. “Just a distraction.”

“That’s not a nice way to speak of someone’s feelings,” Raven murmured before nipping lightly at Anya’s earlobe.

“She knew.”

“A distraction from what?”

Raven’s voice was dripping with false innocence, and Anya knew she was just toying with her – when she looked into her eyes, she saw they were dark and full of a taunt - it was as though her eyes were smirking though her lips were not. It would’ve been annoying were she barely a breath away from her, were she not slowly running her fingers up along Anya’s neck to lace through her hair and draw her in for a kiss so sweet and sensual it wiped everything else away from Anya’s mind.

“A distraction from what, Anya?”

Anya had never been a fan of her own name, but on Raven’s tongue, it sounded right.

“You.”

Raven had figured as much, had entertained the thought that perhaps Anya had stolen glances at her as often Raven had done of her – that perhaps during all those times spent secretly wanting to get closer, wanting to lean in and rest herself against Anya, her wants hadn’t been one-sided after all.

“So do you need a distraction any more?”

Anya rolled her eyes. “Well, unless this is just a one-time thing, I’ll have no need for a distraction.”

Raven smiled and dipped her head down to meet Anya’s lips. “Don’t worry,” she murmured as she pushed Anya down onto her back, “I think this is going to be an all-time thing.”

She was surprised how easy it was with Anya, how confident she was – she’d only fumbled around with Harper those years before, and then she’d only been with Finn – but she knew what to do. It wasn’t so complicated, really, and so when she slid one hand down along Anya’s stomach while littering kisses along her neck and chest, she wasn’t too nervous.

Maybe a little, but not very.

When she enclosed her lips around a nipple, she could hear Anya’s breath hitch in her throat – her fingers were toying with the waistband of her underwear, twirling the little bow adorning the middle of the black lace, and Raven grinned when she realized just how wanting she’d rendered the woman beneath her.

“Raven…” Anya breathed, and Raven looked up at her, eyebrows cocked in a way that caused Anya to roll her eyes.

“How can you look so infuriating with just the slight raise of an eyebrow?” Anya groaned.

Raven just shrugged and let her teeth gently bite at Anya’s nipple, causing her to jump slightly in surprise – and then, when Raven had Anya pleading, she moved her hand into her underwear.

She was smooth, the skin was so soft, and then, her fingers dipped into wetness, and she couldn’t withhold the gasp that left her lips.

She’d been with Harper before, years ago. And she’d been with Anya not a week earlier, but then, she’d been drunk. Now she was fully aware of what was happening, and she realized then that she was experiencing something entirely new. It was surprising, it was different to feel another woman instead of herself, and in that moment, Raven felt a little nervous.

But those nerves melted away in the face of the fact that the feel of Anya’s arousal coating her fingers was intoxicating, and so Raven slid her hand down further, pressing down and circling her fingers in search of the spots that made Anya tick.

Anya laid her head back and let Raven do as she pleased – just the sheer touch of Raven’s fingers, aimless as of yet, was enough to make her shudder, and when Raven slid two fingers into her, a whimper escaped her lips, surprising her entirely.

She’d never made involuntary noises during sex, nothing more than a few exasperated gasps at best – but Raven was different. Raven’s sheer presence was intoxicating, and though Anya could feel that Raven was still inexperienced, she was more than good enough to have Anya responding in ways she’d never responded to anyone.

As she lay there, Raven’s fingers pumping in and out of her and curling in ways that made her gasp and squirm, she shuddered at the thought of what it’d be like when Raven grew experienced. If it felt this good now with her touch still unsure and tentative, she dared not imagine what it’d be like when Raven knew what to do and had all the confidence in the world.

_Christ, this is ridiculous,_ Anya thought to herself. But then she felt lips graze her ear, and shuddered once again – and Raven chuckled, sending a spiral of shudders racing through Anya’s body.

“I want to taste you,” Raven murmured into Anya’s ear as she curled her fingers again, pressing into her and causing her hips to raise along with her hand. “Can I?”

Anya let out a deep breath and looked at her, bewildered. “Just fucking fuck me, Raven.”

“Isn’t that what I’m doing?” Raven smirked, shoving her fingers in as deep as she could, causing a moan to leave Anya’s lips. “Or isn’t this enough?”

“Raven…”

Anya had meant to say Raven’s name in a threatening tone, to warn her against teasing her any longer – but it came out more as a moan, and the satisfied smirk never left Raven’s face as she shuffled backwards, pulling Anya’s underwear down along with her.

Anya turned a little so that Raven was able to kneel on the floor and place her head comfortably between her legs. The change in position gave her a perfect view of Raven as the brunette leaned back on her knees to tie her hair up in a pony tail, her eyes never leaving Anya’s.

Anya felt vulnerable, laying there, legs spread, breathing heavily in anticipation, just _waiting_ for Raven to touch her again. Raven knew this, and so they were both surprised when she laid her hand on Anya’s thigh and Anya jumped slightly in response. A smile spread onto Raven’s lips, and as she slid one hand along the inside of Anya’s thigh to touch her, she ran her other hand along her thigh, stroking and feeling the smooth skin, the gesture almost calming in it’s tone.

Raven knew and felt the little bundle of nervousness in her gut, but pushed it aside – she wasn’t thinking much as she leaned in and ran her tongue along Anya’s slit, the first taste of Anya’s arousal both novel and so familiar on her lips.

That taste brought back memories to her, of her in that same position, only they’d been on Anya’s bed and she’d been so drunk she couldn’t even properly sense what was going on other than the fact that Anya’s hands were in her hair, guiding her through the motions. Now, though, Anya’s hands weren’t there to guide her, and Raven feared she wouldn’t be good enough.

But, after a few strokes of her tongue, she gave up on worrying, because just the taste and the feel of Anya beneath her was more than enough to send her into a state of absolute lust and passion for the woman before her. She buried her face in between Anya’s thighs and let her tongue find a rhythm that soon had Anya’s thighs on Raven’s shoulders quivering, but Raven wasn’t so satisfied with finishing Anya off so quick – no, she returned to teasing, running her tongue around in circles and changing her patterns every now and then, till Anya was a writhing mess on the couch, completely at her mercy. By this point, one of Anya’s hands had found it’s way to curl around her pony tail, tugging at it gently as though to beg for more – but Raven didn’t listen to Anya’s wordless pleas.

And then, finally, Anya let slip the words Raven had been waiting for.

“Please, Raven- please-“

Raven grinned and moved back to circle her tongue around Anya’s clit, increasing her pace just slightly till she had Anya quivering beneath her mouth – after a few sucks on her clit, Anya’s pleas had turned to moans and gasps, and when her hand on Raven’s head grew tighter with it’s grip, Raven knew she was close. Her hands, which she had planted on Anya’s hips, kept Anya somewhat in place as Raven kept working, nothing else mattering to her but Anya’s pleasure.

And then Raven heard a moan, felt Anya’s hips buck beneath her mouth, and saw her back arch, pushing more of her into Raven’s mouth – her legs tightened around Raven’s head, and Raven saw Anya’s eyes were shut, mouth open after the moan had left it moments before. Raven kept going until a gentle tug on the pony tail signalled her to stop.

When Anya looked down at Raven, kneeling before her, mouth and lips coated in her arousal, she thought she’d surely never seen a more beautiful sight in her life. Her head was swimming with pleasure and joy and sheer, post-orgasmic relaxation, and for a moment, she feared she’d pass out. But then Raven moved up to straddle her lap again, and Anya became all-too aware of the fact that while she was entirely naked, Raven was still wearing most of her clothes – only her hoodie had been shed, leaving her in a sports bra and leggings.

“You’re wearing too many clothes,” Anya muttered, pulling Raven’s bra over her head and tossing it aside. “Ready for round two?”

Raven looked at Anya with wide eyes. “Shit, I forgot-“

Anya panicked for the briefest of moment, and when Raven saw that, she giggled. “No, no, I didn’t mean to scare you, nothing’s wrong – geez, you look like someone just punched you in the face.

Anya grumbled. “What’d you forget about?”

“Nothing.”

“Raven…”

“It’s nothing!” Raven insisted. “We don’t have to talk.”

Anya dodged Raven’s lips and gave her a look. “Tell me.”

“No.”

“Do I have to make you?”

“Make me how?”

Anya raised an eyebrow and a hand to Raven’s side, her fingers ghosting over her bare skin in a way that made her jump.

“No, no, fine- I’ll tell you, Jesus.”

Anya smirked and leaned back, letting her hands rest on Raven’s hips. “Then tell me.”

“I just forgot that, you know, with a woman…you don’t really have to wait.”

Anya raised an eyebrow. “Wait? For what?”

“For, ah- do we have to talk about this?”

“Please do, you look absolutely adorable when you’re flustered.”

Raven was caught off guard by Anya’s words, and in truth, Anya was too.

“You think I'm adorable?”

Anya groaned and pulled Raven back to her. “Shut up.”

She silenced Raven's consequent protest with a rough kiss. Raven sighed and leaned in closer, allowing herself to fall into the kiss, not caring for her protest or the rude way they'd been cut off. She would’ve been content there, just sitting in Anya’s lap and not talking, just kissing – but, of course, it was at that exact moment that her phone decided to ring.

“Think they’ll stop if we ignore it?” Raven asked, kissing Anya again.

“Definitely.”

After a while, the phone stopped ringing. But it only remained silent for maybe a minute before it rang again, and Raven let out a groan. “I have to answer.”

Anya nodded, and Raven stood up to go find her phone. Anya followed, and when Raven did find her phone hidden in the pile of clothes they’d left next to the door, she wrapped her arms around Raven’s waist from behind and began running a trail of kisses along Raven’s shoulder.

“Hi, who’s this?”

“Raven?”

Raven frowned. “Wick?”

“Yeah, it’s me. I said I’d call.”

Anya’s lips sucked at Raven’s pulse point and she let out a sigh of pleasure before speaking. “That you did.”

_Ah, crap._

“Look, Wick-“

Raven faltered when she felt Anya’s hands sliding lower along her stomach, and her breath actually hitched in her throat when Anya turned her around and knelt before her. She missed what Wick was saying because she was more focused on Anya’s hands pulling her leggings and underwear off of her, Anya’s eyes locked in her own, a smirk plastered on the lips that she’d been kissing not a moment earlier.

“Raven?”

“Hmm?”

“You okay?”

“Yeah, I’m- I’m fine.”

“Did you hear what I said?”

“Sorry, no, I tripped-“

“I’m outside your apartment.”

Raven froze. Anya noticed her tension and looked at her in concern, her hands resting on Raven’s thighs, her thumbs gently stroking the skin without her even realizing.

“Uh, why?” Raven asked.

“I was wondering if that date could be now. Top Gear’s on in fifteen minutes, we could order take out and-“

“How’d you even know where to come?”

“I got your address from the shop’s employee register.”

“Look, Wick, I’m not at home.”

“Really? The lights are on-”

Anya’s hands slid down to Raven’s knees and gently pushed her legs more apart, and she moved forth without protest from Raven – when her mouth met Raven’s sex, Raven had to bite her tongue to suppress the moan that tried to sneak it’s way through, and she wanted to hang up the call immediately.

“I guess my roommate’s home,” Raven sighed. She was glaring at Anya, who was looking up at her with the most insufferable smirk in her eyes as her tongue worked it’s way into forcing pleasure to course through Raven’s veins. “I’m not available tonight, Wick, and actually – look, I made a mistake. I’m…I’m not ready.”

“Not ready? For what?”

“For…dating,” Raven muttered, drawing a curious look from Anya, mouth still buried in between her thighs. “I gotta go, Wick.”

“Wait, Raven—“

But Raven had already hung up, and she tossed her phone aside as she finally let out the moan she’d been suppressing for a long while.

“Fucking shit, Anya-“

Anya just grinned and paused for a second. “You could’ve told me to stop.”

“As if I ever could,” Raven grumbled.

“Do you want me to go on?”

Raven leaned back against the door and lifted her hips towards Anya. “You started this. Now finish it.”

 

* * *

 

It wasn’t until a long, long while later that they found themselves sprawled out on Raven’s bed. Raven was laying on her back, head hanging off the edge of the bed and hands reaching over her head to toy with the furry rug laid out beside it. Anya lay on her back also, staring at the twinkle lights Raven had strung up over and across her ceiling, so that no overhead lights were necessary – just twinkle lights, like a thousand little suns, strung up in the ceiling of Raven’s room.

“Not ready for dating, huh?”

It took a while for Raven to realize what Anya was referring to. “That was a lie,” she muttered. “To get Wick off my back.”

“And who’s Wick?”

“No one.”

“No, tell me.”

“It’s nothing to talk about.”

“I’m curious.”

Raven shrugged. “He’s a…guy.”

“A guy?”

“No need to sound jealous,” Raven smirked as she got up to lay back down beside Anya. “He asked me out, I said yes. Then…this, us- happened, so I told him I wouldn’t do it anymore.”

Anya nodded lazily. “This isn’t just sex for you, right?”

Raven rolled haer eyes. “No. You?”

Though she was certain of the answer, she was still a little nervous up until the point where she saw Anya shake her head.

“No, not just sex.”

They were quiet for a while. Neither of them knew what to say, really.

It was Raven who finally spoke up, though what she said wasn’t quite what she’d formulated in her head.

She’d intended on asking Anya how she saw her, whether she wanted to date her – but what she ended up asking was:

“Do you like me?”

She cringed inwardly the instant she’d asked the question, but it was too late.

Anya let out a laugh. “What are you, five?”

Raven groaned and laid her face into a pillow to hide her embarrassed blush. “Shut up.”

Anya just laughed again, and after a while, Raven dared to look back up.

“Well, I at least like you,” Raven finally amended, “And yes, I know that sounds like kindergarten talk, but-“

Anya just rolled her eyes. “Yes, Raven, I like you. Most of the time.”

“Most of the time?”

“When you’re not being an asshole, that is.”

“But I’m an asshole all the time.”

“Pretty sure you aren’t.”

“Pretty sure I am.”

“Pretty sure,” Anya began, swiftly moving to lay atop Raven, “That you aren’t.”

She kissed Raven, and for a while, Raven forgot her words.

“So, wait…”

Anya raised an eyebrow. “What now?”

“Are we dating?”

Anya glanced at their current naked forms and shrugged. “I don’t know. Do you want to be?”

“Do you?”

Anya thought on it for a moment. She hadn’t really dated anyone for years, hadn’t been so interested – there’d been girlfriends in high school and college, but none for which she’d felt anything near to what she felt for Raven. No, dating was definitely something Anya hadn’t really done.

“I guess.”

Raven groaned and smacked Anya’s arm. “I hate that phrase.”

“You love it.”

“No, I really don’t.”

Anya let out another laugh and laid herself fully onto Raven, smothering the girl’s face with her hair as she laid her face into her neck.

“Anya, I’m choking,” Raven cried out melodramatically. “I’m dying.”

“No, you’re not.”

“Maybe not.”

“Idiot.”

“Rude.”

There was another long moment of silence.

 “Anya?”

“Hmm?”

“Can you stay here tonight?”

“You want more? After all-“

“No, I mean sleep.”

“Raven, I live here.”

“Jesus, no, I mean in here. My room.”

Anya shrugged. “I guess.”

“Next time you say that phrase, I’ll kill you.”

“I’d like to see you try.”

“Is that a challenge I hear?”

Anya smirked, though Raven didn’t see it because Anya’s face was currently pressed into her neck.

“I guess.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'ALL ARE WELCOME FOR ALL THAT NICE BEAUTIFUL SMUT  
> and don't worry there's a lil bit of drama-o-rama coming but it's all fine they had sex and NOBODY'S GETTING SHOT 5MIN AFTER SEX just a lil disclaimer no one's gonna die


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> y'all have got to stop begging me for updates im tryna graduate high school  
> but here's this lil thing

Raven woke up confused.

There was something warm and heavy on top of her, pressing her down and unmoving – after a moment of laying there, eyes still shut, Raven came to the realization that it was a person.

Her eyes shot open, and she saw a head of dirty blonde hair, a face hidden in her neck, and a warmth spread through her chest when she recognized her.

_Anya._

Her stomach erupted with butterflies when she realized that Anya was laying on top of her, naked, still fast asleep. The sheets exposed most of Anya’s back, muscular and smooth, and one of her hands was resting on Raven’s neck, fingertips just lightly pressing against her skin.

Her breaths were even and slow, and every now and then she let out a little quiet sigh.

Raven smiled, and slowly as one could, began to run her fingers up and down Anya’s back, drawing irregular patterns, just marvelling at the feel of Anya beneath her.

She felt a little sore, but in the best of ways. The room smelled of sex, but, unlike with Finn, the scent didn’t make Raven’s skin crawl. She didn’t feel regret or disgust at herself for doing this, for sleeping with Anya – no, if anything, she was pleased.

She would’ve wished to stay there forever, but couldn’t. She had to pee.

She tried to push Anya off of herself, but the woman mumbled something in her sleep before tightening her grip of Raven.

“Anya,” Raven muttered, trying to shove her off again. “Anya.”

“Shh…sleep.”

“Get off.”

Anya grumbled and nuzzled her face even deeper into Raven’s neck. “Stop squirming, I’m trying to sleep.”

 “I need to pee.”

With another grumble, Anya rolled off of Raven, still asleep.

When Raven came back from the bathroom, however, she found Anya sitting up in bed, looking confused.

“We really did—“

Raven grinned and climbed back into bed, greeting Anya with a kiss. “Yeah. We did.”

Anya was still looking wary, and Raven furrowed her brows in confusion. “What?”

“This is ok?”

“What?”

“Us. We-“ Anya faltered and fell silent, turning her head away as she tried to find words to say that didn’t sound idiotic.

Raven sat on the bed and looked at her for a while before realizing what she was worrying about.

“I don’t regret it, if that’s what you’re worrying about.”

Anya turned her head back to look at her. “That’s not it.”

“Then what?”

“I can’t ask you that.”

“Anya, what is it?”

Anya looked at Raven carefully. “What are you?”

“What?”

“Like, straight? Or…?”

“Not straight,” Raven said quickly. “I- I don’t know what really, but not straight.”

She eyed Anya carefully, fearing she’d be dissatisfied with her answer – but the woman just shrugged and leaned in for another kiss, and when their lips met, Raven felt a smile pressing against her own mouth.

“What?”

Anya just shrugged and looked elsewhere.

“Anya…”

“This is…nice.” Anya sighed. “Not sure how to explain, but-“

Raven quirked an eyebrow. “Just nice?”

“Okay, maybe this is more than just nice-“

“You’re not good with words, are you?”

Anya shot Raven a glare. “And you have a habit of interrupting.”

“Sorry.”

“I’ve just…I spent weeks, Raven, _months_ trying to ignore you. And you just burst in and in one night, all that hard work is just…gone.”

“But that’s a good thing, yes?”

“Yes.”

“Then what’s the problem?”

“The problem,” Anya sighed, “Is that I’ve got work in an hour.”

“How’s that a problem?”

“Because I’d rather be doing something else.”

Raven raised an eyebrow. “Like what?”

For her answer, Raven received Anya’s lips on her own, and Anya’s hands pushing her down on the bed.

“You,” Anya murmured. “I’d much rather be doing you.”

 

* * *

 

An hour later, Raven was left alone in the apartment, and realization hit her.

She’d kissed Anya.

Not just kissed.

She’d slept with her, both figuratively and literally.

Hell, she’d woken up with Anya’s face in her neck. Just the memory of her sleepy face on her skin, the ghost of her touch against her neck, simply the _thought_ of Anya being so close left Raven with shudders and a warmth in her chest she’d never felt in her life.

She sighed and flopped back onto the bed, and basked in the scent that surrounded her – it was her own, after all, it was her own bed, but it now also smelled like Anya. It was soft and comforting, and she could smell a hint of lavender – she wasn’t so sure whether it was in her perfume or her shampoo or her lotion, but it was enticing, everything about Anya was enticing, and she simply couldn’t get enough.

She laid there for a long while, just smiling and staring at the ceiling, until finally her grumbling stomach forced her out of bed.

When she was done with her morning routine, she came to the conclusion she needed to talk. Saying ‘I’m not straight’ may have been enough for Anya, but it wasn’t for Raven. She wanted to figure herself out, she felt like she needed to – and so she pulled out her phone and called her best friend.

“Hey, Clarke,” she said when Clarke picked up. “I gotta talk. You free?”

“Yeah, today’s Saturday, so…”

“Can I come over?”

“Sure thing.”

When Raven got to Clarke’s place, she was met by Lexa at the door – she was just leaving for work, and gave her a curious look before walking off and leaving Raven alone with Clarke.

“Ok, shoot.”

“Let me sit down first, geez.”

Clarke and Raven sat down, and for a long while, Raven tried to figure out what to say.

“You okay?”

Raven glanced at Clarke. “Um, yeah. I think so, yeah.”

“What’s up?”

“Um…”

Clarke just waited patiently for Raven to get a grip of her thoughts.

“You know how I told you about Harper?”

“Mhm?”

“And how I thought it was a one-time thing?”

“Ok…”

“Well, something happened-“

“Did you sleep with her?”

“No!” Raven said quickly. “Well, not her…”

“Then who?”

“It’s not relevant.”

“It definitely is.”

“I’ll tell you when it’s appropriate, ok?”

“You’re killing me here, Reyes.”

“That’s not why- I’m confused, ok?”

“Confused how?”

“How did you know you were bisexual?”

Clarke’s eyes widened a little. “Oh. _That_ kind of confused.”

“Yeah.”

Raven felt Clarke’s hand tug at her sleeve a little, and took the hint to lean her head against her shoulder. She was tired and confused, and Clarke was always a good cuddler. She knew how to soothe people even when they didn’t know they needed soothing.

“I just…knew,” Clarke began. “I liked boys, and it was nice. And then I liked girls, too, and it was equally as nice. It wasn’t so confusing for me.”

“So you liked boys and girls the same?”

“Yeah, but that’s not how it is for all bisexuals…”

“I know I loved Harper,” Raven muttered. “At some point. I know I did.”

“Mhm.”

“But Finn…”

“You didn’t love him?”

“I don’t know, that’s the thing. Like, the girl I- ok, I might’ve had a crush on her for months, and maybe we finally slept together last night, and _maybe_ I kissed her before I broke up with Finn-“

“What?”

“It was an accident, I think, I wasn’t thinking and I told him straight away but when I went there to tell him I caught him kissing another girl and, you know the rest-“

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because-“ Raven shrugged. “I thought I’d fucked it up with both Finn and her. I didn’t want to talk about her.”

“But…you didn’t fuck it up? Seeing as you slept together?”

“Yeah, no. Well…we slept together last week, too, after the party-“

“So _that’s_ where you went!”

“Yeah.”

“Ok, I’ll have to meet this girl, you know that right?”

Raven nodded. _You already have. She’s your girlfriend’s sister._ “I know.”

“What’s she like?”

Now Raven had to think about it for a second, had to consider what she could and couldn’t say. “She’s…nice. Quiet, and annoying, and she’s got the prettiest eyes and she’s so fit and slender and she doesn’t smile often, but when she does…she thinks I’m an idiot but I think it’s in the cute way, and she smells really nice.”

“Ok, Raven, that’s really gay.”

“Shut up.”

“But how do you feel about her?”

“I- I don’t know, Clarke.”

“You don’t know?”

Raven shrugged again and toyed with the string of her hoodie. “She’s…it’s so intense, Clarke. It’s electric. Just seeing her, being in the same room, it feels like the whole world’s going to slip away if she touches me. And when she does, it’s…nothing compares.”

“Nothing?”

“No.”

“Not even Finn?”

“God, Finn isn’t even close- wasn’t even close, I mean. Never.”

“Not even in the beginning?”

“Finn was easy, Finn was nice. Finn, he- he was my best friend.”

“That’s a good quality in a partner.”

“But I’m starting to think he was _just_ my best friend.”

Clarke nodded. “I see.”

“But how can I know?”

“Well, that’s up to you.”

“It’s stupid.”

“No it’s not.”

“But…I can’t be gay, can I? I dated a guy for five years-“

“Lexa dated a guy for two years in middle school. And what about Monroe? She was _engaged_ to Monty before they both realized they were about as straight as a curly fry. Who you date doesn’t determine your sexuality.”

“You sure?”

“Yep.”

“So…if I was gay…”

“You’re not honestly going to ask me if I’d be ok with it, are you?”

“No.”

“Then what were you going to ask?”

“Would it be weird? If I was gay?”

“No, but…you’re not attracted to guys?”

“I don’t know…I don’t think so? I always thought I just wasn’t that interested, but, damn- I’ve been looking at women and dying for ages, and now, it’s just…”

Clarke chuckled. “You’re so gay.”

“I think I really am.”

“Well, Octavia would owe me five bucks, but otherwise-“

“What!?”

“She and I have a bet,” Clarke smiled. “A little playful one, nothing to worry about. She said you were bi, I said you were gay.”

“And why wasn’t I told about this?”

“Because it’s not our place to put speculations in your head.”

“You buy me ice cream with that fiver and we’ll be even,” Raven grumbled. “Is it really that obvious?”

“Well, the whole boyfriend thing was kinda throwing us all off, but…I guess. I’m your best friend, Raven.”

“Us all? Is my sexuality a common topic of discussion?” Raven exclaimed.

Clarke laughed. “No, it’s not. We talked about it once, that’s it.”

“When?”

“Oh, it must’ve been a couple of months ago. After you said you’d gladly bang any woman in that club that one time.”

“That time I was in the bathroom heaving all alone?”

“Hey! I didn’t know where you’d gone!”

“I know, I know. Still, you’re an ass.”

Clarke let out a laugh and gave Raven a little nudge. “You still confused?”

“I’ve been sorta confused for about two months, Clarke. I didn’t entirely realize it, but-”

“And you won’t tell me her name?”

“I gotta see where this goes first, with her. I mean, we just slept together. Twice.”

“Ok, tell me this. Did you sleep at her place, or did she sleep at yours?”

“Mine.”

“Did she sleep over?”

“Yes.”

“Did she cuddle you in her sleep?”

“Yes.”

“Then it’s love, bitch.”

“No it’s not.”

“It will be, if you keep going. Who was the little spoon?”

“Neither.”

“Huh?”

“She slept on top of me.”

“Raven, oh my god. That’s adorable.”

“Shut up.”

“Never.”

“You’re an ass.”

“And you’ve got a girlfriend.”

“No I do not.”

“Have you talked about it?”

“We haven’t even gone out on a date.”

“So you just had sex?”

“Sorta, yeah. It just kinda…happened.”

“How?”

“She was mad at me because she thought I was still with Finn and had cheated on him with her. I told her Finn was out of the picture, and…”

“You’ve got game.”

“Shut up?”

“Where does she work?”

“Not telling.”

“Hair color? Eyes?”

“Not telling.”

“Height?”

“Taller than me.”

“How much?”

“A little, not much.”

“You’re really not telling me anything, are you?”

“No.”

 

* * *

 

She left Clarke’s apartment a while later because she had work, and left feeling much better than she’d come. She sat in her car for a while, just thinking it over and over, until she finally pulled out her phone and sent out a text to Anya.

**Raven (08:56)**

_Talked to Clarke, pretty sure everyone knows I’m gay. Wanna go for a real date?_

She took a deep breath before sending it, and for the four minutes that it took for Anya to reply, her stomach twisted in a thousand knots.

**Anya (09:00)**

_Gay, huh? Could’ve figured…and yes, I’d love to. Though I’d say that we’ve already been on a few…_

**Raven (09:00)**

_What do you mean?_

**Anya (09:01)**

_The beach, the movie…the only thing separating those from a date was that we didn’t kiss._

**Raven (09:01)**

_Shut up, they were perfectly platonic._

**Anya (09:01)**

_We cuddled under the same blanket as we watched the sun set, and you rested your head on my shoulder and cuddled my arm. I’d say that’s not quite platonic._

**Raven (09:01)**

_Ok, maybe you’re right._

**Raven (09:01)**

_Shouldn’t you be saving lives?_

**Anya(09:01)**

_I’m on call. Sitting in the nurses’ break room sipping their coffee, waiting for some poor idiot to hurt themselves._

Raven frowned a little when she heard that. Her mind had immediately leapt to Niylah, and though she desperately wanted to remain cool, she’d felt a pang of jealousy in her chest.

**Anya (09:01)**

_Niylah isn’t here, in case you’re wondering._

**Raven (09:02)**

_I wasn’t._

**Anya (09:02)**

_Sure you were._

**Raven (09:02)**

_Ok, maybe I was. But the date?_

**Anya (09:03)**

_I’ll get off of work tomorrow around midnight. Won’t be much fun until I’ve slept, so…Monday night?_

**Raven (09:03)**

_Monday night sounds good._

**Anya (09:04)**

_You have anything planned, or are you just going to improvise?_

**Raven (09:04)**

_Improv is my strong suit, princess._

**Anya (09:05)**

_Doesn’t sound too convincing. And don’t call me princess._

**Raven (09:05)**

_Fine. But trust me, I’ll come up with something nice._

**Anya (09:05)**

_Ok, I trust you._

**Anya (09:05)**

_Some idiot messed up while playing around with a nail gun. Gotta go save their ass._

**Raven (09:05)**

_You go, Superwoman. See you on Monday._

**Anya (09:06)**

_I’ll come crash in your bed, you idiot. See you tomorrow._

Raven was unable to wipe the stupid smile from her face the whole drive to work, and even when she’d gotten there, she was still feeling giddy and happy. She practically skipped to her locker to change into her jumpsuit, and was smiling all the way to the point when the locker door was slammed in front of her to reveal a very pissed off Wick.

He was angry, and Raven was confused.

“What the fuck was that last night?”


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i survived math so here, have some ranya  
> or a lot of ranya

Raven looked at Wick, and immediately wanted to punch him in the gut. She hadn’t quite realized it before, but he had that face – he wasn’t ugly, anything but, but there was some quality, something that made her feel like she was being judged.

“Look, Wick, I’m sorry, but-“

“I come over, expecting to have a nice night, and you practically slam the door in my face-”

“I didn’t ask you to come over,” Raven reminded him. "You just showed up."

“I thought it’d be a nice gesture.”

“It was borderline creepy, Wick. You dug up my address, showed up at my place without invitation…”

“It was supposed to be cute.”

“Well, it wasn’t.”

“But why’d you say no? When you said yes before?”

“It’s none of your business.”

“I deserve an explanation.”

Raven frowned and pushed past him. “I don’t have to explain myself to you.”

“I think you do.”

“Look,” Raven sighed. “I’ve got someone else, ok?”

“Someone else!? You managed to find someone else in between yesterday morning and evening?”

Raven shrugged. “Yes.”

“Who is it?”

“None of your business.”

“You didn’t get back with Finn, did you?”

“No.”

“Is it that Bellamy guy you sometimes hang out with?”

“Wick, I think you’re a little too obsessed,” Raven snapped. “Just let it go, ok?”

Wick threw his hands up in the air and shrugged. “Fine, fine. No need to tell me.”

“Thank you,” Raven sighed. “Now, if we could get to work?”

 

* * *

 

 

When she got off work later that evening, there was an unusually large amount of texts awaiting her.

She opened the two from Anya first, choosing to check on Octavia’s impressive 12 texts later.

**Anya (13:44)**

_Helped out a guy who got a screwdriver stuck in his ass. Never try that, ok?_

**Anya (16:08)**

_Finally got to my lunch. Did you steal my Twinkie?_

**Raven (19:03)**

_Maybe I annexed your Twinkie. MAYBE._

**Raven (19:03)**

_Oh, and don’t worry. I won’t try to shove a screwdriver up my ass._

She chuckled to herself and moved on to read the texts from Octavia.

**Octavia (11:14)**

_Clarke tells me you have a girlfriend. Congrats. You sure you’re not bi? I’m literally broke and she’s demanding the fiver now._

**Octavia (11:15)**

_Who’s the girlfriend, though? Why haven’t we heard ANYTHING? Is she some hotshot secret spy?_

**Octavia (11:15)**

_She better be amazing, you deserve nothing less. Bitch better watch out._

**Octavia (11:16)**

_Seriously, won’t you tell us anything?_

**Octavia (11:58)**

_Rae, I’m dying. Tell me._

**Octavia (13:27)**

_Raven Maria Eleonora Reyes, you tell me right this second who this mystery girl is or I’ll come hunt you down._

**Octavia (13:31)**

_I’m not below stalking, you know. I will find her._

**Octavia (13:34)** _  
_

_Raven, please, you're killing me_

**Octavia(13:34)**

_I just want to make sure she won't break your gay little heart_

**Octavia (13:35)**

_Or bi little heart, it's still not too late for me to get that fiver back from Clarke_

**Octavia (13:35)**

_I'm just kidding I love you no matter what if you're gay then you're gay if bi then bi, but seriously, if you don't tell me about her I'll have to torture you for intel_

**Octavia (17:02)**

_Ok, maybe I won’t stalk. Just tell me something. All Clarke knows is that she slept on top of you. Is she taller than you? Older, younger? Long hair? Short hair?_

Raven stared at her phone screen for a while before finally deciding on what to say.

**Raven (19:06)**

_She’s taller than me. A little older. Long-ish hair. So hot I’m afraid I’ll melt. Makes my head spin. Smells amazing._

**Octavia (19:06)**

_That’s sappy. Gross._

**Octavia (19:06)**

_Will we ever get to meet her?_

**Raven (19:07)**

_We’ll see._

 

* * *

 

She slept alone that night, and slept soundly – but, come morning, it was empty, something was amiss, and Raven knew what it was.

She contemplated sending Anya a good morning text, but decided against it.

When she came back from the shower, however, she noticed a text from Anya.

**Anya (07:01)**

_Hope I don’t wake you. I’m dying._

**Raven (07:08)**

_How come?_

**Anya (07:08)**

_Been driving around all night. There’s vomit and blood on me. I haven’t eaten since yesterday._

**Raven (07:09)**

_Sounds like shit. Try to survive._

**Anya (07:09)**

_Will try. Could you pick up some oranges when you go to the store? I’ll need all the vitamin C I can get._

**Raven (07:11)**

_Sure thing._

**Raven (07:11)**

_Good morning, by the way._

**Anya (07:12)**

_Good morning. Hope you have a fun day at work. I have to go._

She disappeared then, but even those few texts had left Raven with a smile on her face.

Her day passed by smoothly enough – she went for a run, and watched TV, and then browsed around on her computer, completed a couple dozen Rubik’s puzzles, trying to ward off her boredom. At some point she had a handstand competition by herself, and almost hurt herself – but not quite, she just fell to the floor and lay there, the wind knocked out of herself, for a while before getting up and deciding enough was enough.

She went to the store and bought oranges and ice cream and some other snacks, and had a delicious dinner consisting of hot pockets and leftover Chinese.

When she went to bed around eleven, she was practically falling asleep on the spot, and knocked out almost immediately.

 

* * *

 

Anya’s day had been long, gruelling, and by the time she got off, she was practically dead. It took all of her remaining strength to walk the ten minutes home, and the stairs felt like Mount Everest. It took her two tries to open the door, her hands weren’t functioning anymore.

She dragged herself to the bathroom and shed all of her clothes, tired to the point of delusion, and stepped into the shower. There was blood and other bodily fluids on her skin, and she smelled of sweat and pure exhaustion – there was no way she was going to bed feeling as filthy as she did.

She almost fell asleep in the shower, and just barely caught herself drooping before her eyes shut entirely. That was when she shut the water off and stepped out, only briefly drying herself before walking over into her own room.

She grabbed some shirt from a nearby pile, and a fresh pair of underwear, and put them on, groaning as her heavy limbs refused to cooperate entirely. Her own bed looked too empty and not nearly as tempting as the other one just on the other side of the wall, and so she forced herself to turn her back and walk back out over to Raven’s room.

She didn’t knock. The door was open, and stepped in to find Raven sprawled out on her stomach smack down in the middle of the bed.

For a brief moment, she stood in the doorway, just taking in the sight. Raven’s bare back shone in the light of the streetlight right outside her window, the sheets barely covering anything. She was wearing sweatpants and nothing else, her hair was up in a messy bun, her face pressed into the pillow as though she were trying to smother herself. As she watched, Raven shifted a little, and murmured something as she kicked the sheets with her leg.

Anya chuckled and finally made her way to the bed.

Raven stirred awake when Anya crawled into bed with her, but only half so – she turned to her side, and allowed Anya to lay in front of her, and then pulled herself closer till she was spooning her, face pressed into the back of Anya’s neck and arm resting over her waist.

“You smell like disinfectant,” she murmured.

Anya sighed and shut her eyes, allowing herself to relax. “Shush. Let me sleep.”

“Mmhm…good night.”

“Good night, Raven.”

 

* * *

 

Raven woke up sometime in the early morning to sleepy hands pulling her. She cracked one eye open and saw that Anya was half awake, but before she could say anything, Anya simply muttered:

“Get on me.”

Raven mumbled something incoherent and did as asked, crawling into Anya’s open arms and resting her head on her chest. “What time is it?”

“I dunno…”

Within seconds, she was asleep again, but for a moment, Raven was not. It was probably around four or five, judging by the fact that it was getting light out, but Anya was fast asleep. In the hazy light of the morning, Raven snuck a look at her sleeping face – she was so peaceful and tranquil, lips parted slightly, even breaths leaving them at steady intervals.

The temptation to kiss her was too much. She shuffled upwards a little and pressed her lips to Anya’s, gently, once at first – and then a second, just a little gentle kiss, not expecting any reciprocity. Anya mumbled something in her sleep and turned her head, and so Raven continued to litter kisses along Anya’s cheek and jaw, soft and slow, enjoying how a little smile spread onto Anya’s lips not a moment later.

She kissed her way down Anya’s jaw and neck, and, with one last little kiss to her clavicle, Raven settled her head back onto Anya’s shoulder. She was too comfortable to think about going to work, and so she reached over and grabbed her phone.

**Raven (05:15)**

_Caught some sort of stomach bug. Won’t be able to come to work, unless you want me to puke all over that fancy Jaguar I’m supposed to be workin on._

**Sinclair (05:17)**

_Thank you for waking me up for that. Get better soon._

Raven smiled to herself and set her phone down. She shifted a little in Anya’s arms and sighed, more content there than she’d probably ever been, and fell back asleep, knowing she’d have all day to do whatever she liked with Anya.

 

* * *

 

The next time she woke up, her phone was ringing.

She was pinned down by Anya, laying on her back with Anya on top of her, one hand laced with Anya’s, the other resting on her ass. She had no idea how or when they’d ended up in that position, but had no complaints whatsoever.

She was so comfortable, but her phone was ringing, and so she begrudgingly removed her hand from Anya’s ass to grab her phone and answer before she woke up.

“What?”

She tried to be as quiet as she could, and for a moment, it seemed that Anya was still fast asleep.

“I’ve texted you like twenty times! I even called your work, and they said you’re sick-?”

Raven sighed when she heard Octavia’s voice. “O, I’m fine. I was just sleeping.”

Anya shifted then, grumbled a little, and brought her hand up to rest on Raven’s chest. “Who is it?”

Her voice was quiet, but Octavia heard it anyway.

“Who is that? Raven, is there a girl in your bed?”

“Maybe?”

“Raven, put the phone away,” Anya mumbled. “And let me sleep.”

Raven stroked Anya’s hair and gave her a little smile. “You sleep, I’ll go talk with O.”

“No, you’re staying,” Anya muttered, tightening her grip around Raven’s waist.

“Fine.”

“Raven?” Octavia tried on the phone. “Are you seriously talking to your girlfriend _while_ on the phone with me?”

“She’s trying to sleep and you woke her up.”

“What person sleeps at three in the afternoon?”

“A very sleepy person,” Raven replied, glancing at Anya with a smirk tugging at her lips. “What’d you text me about?”

“I _need_ to know about this girl you’re dating, Raven.”

“Why?”

“Because we’re friends and I’m nosy, that’s why.”

“Is that what you texted me about?”

“No. How long have you been out of it?”

“I dunno, since last night?”

“Ok, listen up, then.”

“Hmm?”

“Clarke and Lexa got engaged last night.”

“No way!” Raven gasped, so loud that Anya let out a groan. “You’re kidding?”

“Nope, Lexa went all out at her shop – she arranged the flower display so that they read ‘marry me’, and there were of course candles. It was sappy as hell. I’m sure Clarke’ll call you soon.”

“This is amazing.”

Anya was now looking – well, glaring, really – at Raven, confused and curious even amidst her sleepy daze. Raven glanced at her, and then, in a slightly louder voice, said to Octavia: “I can’t _believe_ that Clarke and Lexa got engaged!”

Anya’s eyes widened, and she reached over for her own phone to find the screen blown up with texts from Lexa. She’d known Lexa was contemplating it, but hadn’t known she was going to follow through so soon.

She sat up and got off of Raven, and moved out of the room, despite wanting anything but that.

But her sister had gotten engaged, and she of course had to call her.

“Hello?”

Lexa’s voice sounded sleepy and happy, and Anya smiled. “I hear congratulations are in order.”

“Oh my god, Anya, she said yes, like you said she would, and I knew she would, but still-“

“How cheesy did you make it?”

“Very, but that’s how I am. You know that.”

“Yes, I do. Does Aunt Indra know?”

“No, I waited to tell you first.”

“Why?”

“Because I know the next thing she’d do after I tell her is call you up and ask for measurements for the dress.”

“My dress? I’m not getting married.”

“Yes, but you _are_ going to be my maid of honor, right?”

“I mean, I guess-?”

“Don’t sound so begrudging, it’ll be fun.”

“I’ll have to wear a dress.”

“We’ll see, maybe we’ll find you a nice suit.”

“Oh, no, I’ll wear a dress, or Indra’ll murder me for sure.”

“Great.”

“So, how does it feel, being engaged?”

“Amazing, Anya. It’s…amazing.”

“I’m so happy for you.”

They talked for a little bit, though it mostly consisted of Lexa gushing about all the events of the night before and Anya smiling and nodding along, but finally she hung up – to go see her fianceé, who’d just come home from work.

Anya walked back into the bedroom to find Raven still on the phone, and climbed over to lay on top of her. Raven just smiled and didn’t even skip a beat, just brought a hand up to trace her fingers along Anya’s jaw as she talked.

“No, Clarke, I don’t- I’ll tell you about her when I’ve figured it out, ok?”

Anya didn’t hear what Clarke said on the other end, but smiled nevertheless.

“Look, Clarke- there’s no way I’m having my grand ‘look I’m gay here’s my girlfriend’ debacle now, I’m not about to steal your thunder. I’m not a bitch, last time I checked.”

Anya rolled her eyes and leaned down to kiss Raven’s neck, and Raven let out a little gasp at the touch.

“Raven? You okay?”

Clarke was confused by Raven's sudden silence, and for good reason - Raven, distracted by Anya’s lips on her neck and Anya’s hand running up along her side to cup her breast, forgot her words for a moment too long.

“Raven?”

“Huh? Yeah, I’m – ah – fine.”

“Is your girlfriend there with you as we speak?”

“Yes.”

“Is she doing something inappropriate?”

Raven laughed, but Anya had heard that, and in response, she nipped at Raven’s earlobe and whispered: “You might want to hang up soon, I’m two seconds from stripping you and having you right here and now.”

Raven shuddered, and only barely managed to stammer something coherent into the phone. “Uh, Clarke, I gotta go- she’s, um, yeah…gotta go.”

She hung up the phone and let it drop somewhere, and let out a giggle when Anya’s fingers ghosted along her side, tickling her a little.

“You horny bitch,” she murmured as Anya traced a line of kisses along her jaw towards her lips. “Can’t keep your hands off of me.”

“What can I say? It’s not exactly hard, given you’re barely wearing _anything…_ ”

Raven wrapped her legs around Anya’s waist and pushed their faces together, engulfing her lips with her own.

“Your breath stinks,” she commented amidst kisses.

“No it doesn’t,” Anya replied. “I literally just had a breath mint. It’s you whose breath stinks.”

“Then why won’t you stop kissing me, then?”

Anya shrugged and kissed her again. “Not sure.”

Raven rolled them over, so that she was on top, and grinned. “How’d you sleep?”

“Well.”

“That’s it?”

“Wonderfully,” Anya amended. “Now shut up.”

“Well ar-mmpf…” Raven was cut off my Anya’s mouth seeking her own, engulfing her lips and allowing a tongue to slip past without her even thinking twice. She was rolled back over again, onto her back, and Anya pinned her down as she deepened the kiss.

Wherever Anya’s cool fingers touched, goosebumps and shivers arose, and Raven was more than happy with the turn of events. In no time whatsoever, Anya had Raven whimpering beneath her as she trailed kisses down along her toned stomach towards her wet center, her sex throbbing with need and want which Anya was going to satisfy.

“Fuck-“

Anya’s mouth in between her legs was heaven, and for a long while, Raven forgot about all else. She was gripping the sheets, squirming beneath Anya’s tongue circling her clit, little gasps and whines leaving her lips as she begged Anya to keep going.

She was so close, on the brink of a climax, when Anya withdrew.

“No, Anya, don’t stop-“

Anya just smirked. “That’s what you get for stealing my Twinkie.”

“You’re not gonna-“

Anya shook her head. “You don’t deserve it.”

Raven smirked and moved her own hand in between her legs. “Fine, I’ll do it myself-“

But Anya grabbed her wrist, and the other, and pinned them above her head. “Nope, you’re not.”

Raven’s smirk was wiped right off of her face, and her eyes widened when she realized Anya had all the control.

Anya just smirked and kissed her roughly, drawing a little whine from Raven’s lips.

“If I promised to get you a new Twinkie,” Raven murmured in between kisses, “Would you let me finish?”

Anya shrugged and rolled them over to let Raven on top. “Finish me off, and we’ll see.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ofc clexa was sappy and got engaged and now we get ranya trying to hide their relationship and adorable awkwardness and i'm excited


	11. Chapter 11

“You’re cruel,” Raven murmured a while later as she lay on her back, breathing heavily in the aftermath of her climax. “So…cruel.”

Anya gave one last kiss to the inside of her thigh before climbing back to lay on her side beside her. “Really? And I thought I was all sorts of nice.”

“Shut up, you know what I mean.”

“Shouldn’t have stolen my Twinkie.”

“I was hungry.”

“That’s no excuse.”

Raven shrugged. “Well, I’m not exactly complaining, now am I?”

Anya just let out a laugh. “Did you tell Octavia who this ‘mystery woman in your bed’ was?”

“No, nor did I tell Clarke.”

“Why not?”

Raven shrugged. “I dunno. We haven’t really…we haven’t talked about it. We haven’t even been on a date.”

“Ah, yes, the legendary improv you promised me.”

“Tonight, right?”

Anya laughed at the wary expression in Raven’s eyes. “What? You haven’t planned anything yet, have you?”

“I thought I’d have today to plan.”

“I’d be happy just staying right here,” Anya said quietly. As she spoke, she ran a finger up along Raven’s side, from her hip to her shoulder, and then up along her neck to her chin, to tilt it a little up to kiss her. “I’m feeling very lazy.”

Raven rolled her eyes and kissed her back. “I’m dragging you out. A proper date.”

“And what do you consider a proper date?”

“Food,” Raven listed. “Talking. You using actual phrases with more than two words.”

“You’re annoying,” Anya sighed. “Insisting I talk all the time.”

“It’s only because when you do actually say something, it’s really interesting,” Raven told her. “Oh, and, of course, a goodnight kiss.”

“Just a goodnight kiss?” Anya asked, raising an eyebrow. “Nothing more?”

“Maybe more,” Raven smirked.

“So are we just going to lay here forever, or-?”

“We could get up.”

“Or we could stay.”

“I’m kinda hungry, though.”

“So food it is.”

“Can I steal your hoodie?”

“My hoodie?”

“Yes.”

“You’re actually asking? I’d think you’d just take it.”

Raven rolled her eyes and gave Anya’s arm a little smack. “I’m trying to be nice.”

They got up, begrudgingly as ever, and Anya went over to her room to get dressed. She found a comfy pair of jeans and a shirt, didn’t really care much for which one, and brushed her hair a little – it was messy from not having been washed for a few days, and so she twisted it up into a bun to get it out of her way.

She even made effort with a little bit of makeup, which she rarely did. When Raven walked into her room to steal a hoodie, Anya noticed that she’d touched herself up too, though, frankly, she certainly had no need to. She looked amazing no matter what.

Her hoodie was a little too big for Raven, the sleeves covered her hands and made her look twice as adorable.

“Well?” Raven asked, extending her arm to Anya. “Shall we, milady?”

“If you start up that princess thing again-“ Anya warned.

“No, I won’t. Come on, let’s go.”

It was late August, and the afternoon sun was still blaringly hot. Raven led Anya to her car, and they set off.

Anya had no idea where they were going. Raven only had half an idea.

They were halfway there when Anya’s phone rang.

“It’s my aunt,” she sighed. “I have to answer.”

Raven waved a hand. “No problem.”

Anya just took a deep breath before finally answering her phone.

“Hi Aunt Indra,” she said. “I see Lexa called.”

“Yes, she did, and you have a dress fitting next week.”

Anya fought the urge to groan. “Fair enough.”

“Now, I know you hate dresses, but it’s your sister’s wedding. Do it for her sake, or mine.”

“Fine, fine.”

“And the engagement party, that’s this Friday. Not many people, just family.”

Anya nodded. “Fair enough.”

“Try not to hate all of this,” Indra sighed. “It’s your sister.”

“I don’t hate it.”

“You don’t sound too excited.”

“Just because I’m not jumping from joy doesn’t mean I’m not excited,” Anya smiled. “I’m glad Lexa finally got around to proposing. She’s been trying for almost a year-“

“You knew she was proposing!?”

“I-“

 “I didn’t know a thing? How could you exclude-“

“I gotta go Aunt Indra, saving lives and that sort. Talk to you later!“ Anya said quickly, and hung up.

She set her phone down and let out a huff. “Jesus.”

Raven glanced at her. “And what was that?”

“I think my aunt now has grounds to murder me,” Anya grumbled. “She didn’t know Lexa was going to propose.”

“You did!?”

Anya sighed. “It was _pretty_ obvious-“

“Wait, wait. Did Lexa talk to you? Before?”

“Yes, she asked me for advice.”

“When?”

“Last October.”

Raven turned to look at Anya again, but Anya shoved her face back to face the road. “Eyes on the road, Reyes, or we’re both dead.”

 “October!?” Raven exclaimed. “Lexa’s been planning this since last October?”

“She’s slow.”

“No shit,” Raven said then. “But wait, what did you two talk about?”

“She wasn’t sure Clarke would say yes.”

“You’re kidding.”

“No, apparently the only one who _can’t_ see how sickeningly perfect they’re for each other is Lexa.”

“She’s gotta see it now.”

“I may or may not have smacked her with a pillow when she said she thought there was a chance Clarke would say no.”

“Yeah, that’s more like it,” Raven grinned. “Now, what do you wanna eat? There’s a Mcdonalds right up, or Taco Bell, or-“

“Your pick.”

Raven nodded, and a while later, Anya had a wide assortment of burritos and tacos in a bag in her lap, the smell wafting through and making both their stomachs growl.

“I haven’t eaten all day,” Raven muttered as she turned off the main road to a smaller one, one which ran through the woods, deeper and deeper until they were essentially in the middle of nowhere.

“Where are we going?”

Raven threw Anya a mysterious look. “You’ll see.”

“If you’re planning on murdering me, this would definitely be the place to do it,” Anya said. “There’s no one here. And bugs.”

“Oh, no, are you going to be all princess-y about this?” Raven teased.

“Don’t call me that.”

“Why not?”

“I’m not a princess.”

“To me you are,” Raven smirked. “A very pretty one.”

“That is the grossest thing you’ve ever said.”

"Shut up."

"You know it's true."

“Maybe, but we’re here.”

They came to a small parking area off the side of the road, and Anya saw now that it was the start of some wilderness trail. The afternoon sun peeked it’s way through the canopy, which rustled quietly in the gentle breeze that ran over the forest. The air was fresh and cool, the smell in the air was that of late mountain flowers and what could only be described as green – everywhere you looked, there was green, the leaves of the trees were yet void of any hint of the fast approaching fall, a beautiful color that made the whole forest look alive.

“Now what? Where are we?”

“You’ll see,” Raven told her. “Just you wait. Take the blanket, won’t you?”

She took the bags from Anya’s hands and began walking along the trail, and Anya had no other choice than to follow her. She grabbed her hoodie and the blanket from the car before hurrying after Raven, excited and only a little worried about what Raven’s surprise location for their date was to be.

They followed along the trail for a little while, and neither of them spoke. They walked at a slow pace, so that they could take in the nature around them, and it was as comfortable as it was beautiful. But then Raven took Anya’s hand and led her off the trail, to a smaller path which definitely wasn’t public knowledge, and Anya felt the twist of adventure in her gut once again.

The path ran through the woods, through patches of shrubs where they had to crouch and climb over fallen trees and branches, and at some point, there was a little stream – Raven hopped over it, and Anya did too, and neither of them got their feet wet.

When the path began winding up a steep hill, Anya began getting an idea of where they were headed, or at least what it’d look like. Even so, when they finally stepped out from the bushes to the top of a tall hill, her breath was taken away.

The hill was on the edge of the forest, extending at a far flatter slope down towards where she could see the lake. The top of the hill was clear, there was only one tree on it, a huge old oak with thick branches, covered in leaves a deep lush green. The sun, hanging low over the horizon, was directly before them, and it’s warm rays caressed the small meadow where they stood.

Raven had set the bags down and slid her arms around Anya’s waist, a smile playing on her lips. “Well? It’s nice, isn’t it?”

Anya nodded. “It’s beautiful.”

Raven inhaled deeply, breathing in a mixed scent of the forest around them and that of Anya, and smiled into her neck. “One more surprise.”

“Hmm?”

“We’re gonna climb the tree.”

Anya’s eyes widened, and she turned around to look at Raven in concern. “No, we’re not.”

“Yes, we are.”

“Raven-“

“Come on,” Raven coaxed, taking Anya’s hand in her own and grabbing the bags with the other. “It’s an easy climb, and there’s this one spot that’s essentially like a little landing. I’ve set up a little treehouse there.”

“When?”

Raven shrugged. “Sometime last year. Had plenty of free time.”

“How’d you even find this place?”

“Saw a little path. Decided to follow it.”

“Of course.”

“The treehouse is perfectly safe, I promise.”

“I can’t see it.”

“You will.”

Raven led Anya to the base of the tree and pointed up to the small construction of planks and rope, set up far high in the tree.

“You’ll be fine.”

Anya furrowed her brows. “What if we fall?”

“You’re a trained paramedic, aren’t you?” Ravens smirked. She’d set the bags down and now had her hands clasped together, as though to offer Anya a push upwards. “Come on. Live a little.”

Anya just rolled her eyes and looked up at the branch over her head. “How exactly-?”

Raven pointed to the branch. “You get up on that, and then I’ll hand you the bags, and then I’ll climb after you.”

After a little convincing, Raven finally gave Anya a boost and helped her into the tree. The bags and blankets followed suit, and then she went back a little to get some momentum. She ran towards the tree and jumped, and with a surprising amount of grace, climbed onto the branch beside Anya’s.

“There. See? It’s basically a ladder up there,” Raven said, pointing at the easiest route up. “Just hold on tight to something, and double check your footing. You don’t want to step on a broken branch.”

Anya nodded. She was a little afraid, though she was determined not to show it.

Slowly as she could, she began making her way towards the treehouse, and with only one slip and heart-attack, managed to maneuver herself to the landing. It was surprisingly sturdy, nestled upon two strong branches and fastened with many ropes.

Raven came there not a moment later, and brought along with her the food and the blanket, and the bag that she’d thus far not let Anya look into.

“There we go,” she sighed after she’d set down the bags and shuffled over to sit next to Anya. “This is nice, right?”

“Very nice,” Anya agreed.

“Wait till you see this.”

Raven went over and pulled a rope, which Anya had noticed was tied to the end of a branch covering the view. When it was pulled, the branch was pulled aside, revealing the valley and the view before them, the lake and the city at it’s opposite end, and the sea even beyond that. Anya was absolutely speechless at the sight, and Raven smiled upon noticing this – she moved over, and, carefully as she could, moved into Anya’s lap and pressed her lips to Anya’s.

“Good date so far, hmm?” Raven murmured, her lips grazing Anya’s. “I’d say it is.”

Anya rolled her eyes and wrapped her arms around Raven’s waist. “I guess.”

“Oh my god,” Raven groaned. “The next time you say that, I’ll murder you.”

Anya laughed but said nothing. She was leaning against the trunk of the tree, with Raven straddling her lap, and had a perfect view of both the beautiful brunette in her lap as well as the beautiful scenery extending before them from the little opening in the tree’s branches.

They ate then, and talked, and it was all so comfortable and casual that Anya was sure she’d never been so comfortable with one person. Raven was so bubbly and lively, and so easy to talk to, that she found herself talking far more than she had ever done before – it was baffling, but Raven was so simple, so easy-going, that Anya couldn’t find any moment where she was rendered to uncomfortable silence with her.

The sun set, and they watched it go down, sitting side by side, Raven drawing circles on the back of Anya’s hand, the blanket wrapped around the both of them and keeping them warm. She was resting her head on Anya’s shoulder, and Anya’s head was resting against hers, and everything was comfortable. They were silent, but it was not awkward. Anya focused on the gentle touch of Raven’s fingertips on her hand, and Raven focused on Anya’s steady breaths, and all they could hear was the song of the blackbird, splitting the silence of the forest in the darkening evening.

“I’m invited to the engagement dinner,” Raven said quietly after a long while of silence.

Anya nodded. “I figured.”

“You wanna pretend we aren’t…involved?”

“Until we figure out what this is,” Anya nodded. “I don’t want to rush.”

“That’s smart. Octavia would flip.”

“So would Lexa.”

“True.”

“Besides,” Raven began, turning so that she was facing Anya, “I rather like the idea of keeping it a secret. For now.”

Anya rolled her eyes and snuck a quick kiss. “I do too.”

“I can’t wait to see you in a dress.”

“I was wearing a dress at the party a few weeks ago.”

“And look how that turned out,” Raven smirked.

“Aren’t we supposed to keep this on the down low?”

“There’s nothing that says we can’t have our fun _after_ the party. Or now.”

Anya let out a laugh when Raven dipped her head down to kiss her neck. “Raven, I don’t think this structure can handle us having sex.”

“Are you talking about yourself or the treehouse?”

“The treehouse.”

“Good. Then you can handle it,” Raven murmured as she kissed Anya’s clavicle. “You’re divine and I want more.”

“I don’t want to fall out of this tree.”

“We won’t fall out of the tree.”

“You promise?”

“I promise, Anya,” Raven said, rolling her eyes as she moved back up to kiss her lips. “Now please let me eat you out?”

“I’ll get cold.”

“Then put the blanket over yourself.”

Anya didn’t stop Raven when she pulled her jeans down, no – she laid back down and settled on covering her torso with the blanket, focusing more on Raven’s lips trailing kisses along her stomach than the fact that she was a little chilly.

Her legs might’ve been cold, but Raven’s mouth on her sex was hot. Her tongue soon had Anya whimpering, unable to contain herself – it was crazy how fast a learner she was, and Anya was now truly surrendered to her, she couldn’t deny herself the knowledge that Raven had complete and utter power over her in that instant. A swirl of a tongue over her clit had Anya’s hips bucking and a moan escaping her lips, and Raven was more confident than ever.

She took her sweet time, savoured Anya’s taste and prolonged her pleasure, till it came to the point that Anya’s fist in her hair was so tight that it hurt. That’s when Raven finally allowed herself to settle on a pace, her tongue flicking circles around Anya’s clit, and not long after, she came with a low moan.

Raven smirked at her, still laying in between her legs, and Anya let out a sigh. “Holy fuck.”

“Ever been fucked in a tree before?”

Anya rolled her eyes and tugged at Raven’s hair a little, drawing her up to meet her lips. “No, I haven’t. You?”

Raven caught the curious tone in Anya’s voice, and pulled away to look at her with a smirk in her eyes and on her lips. “You want to know if I’ve brought anyone else here, don’t you?”

Anya shrugged. “It _is_ a very romantic spot.”

“Well, for your knowledge, I never brought Finn here. Or the beach, only once, and he complained about just about everything the whole way through. I’ve never brought _anyone_ here.”

“So you’re yet to be fucked in a tree?”

Raven nodded, and Anya laid her down then, climbed over and captured her lips, and an excited whimper escaped her lips when Anya’s hand slid into her pants and cupped her sex over her underwear. “Looks like you’d like to be fucked in a tree,” Anya murmured as she caught Raven’s lower lip between her teeth.

“Of course I do.”

“No need to be cocky.”

Raven’s expression softened, and, in a quiet voice, she said: “Please, Anya, fuck me in a tree.”

That got the response she knew it would’ve, and Anya was pleased that she’d gotten Raven to beg.

She wasn’t so rough as she would’ve liked, chiefly because she was still a little concerned about how much the treehouse would take – nothing was worth falling out of a tree amidst a pile of planks and rope, and so she went softer, took her time, and rendered Raven a moaning, squirming mess. By the time she was finished with her, the sun had set, and it had grown a little cold. Once clothed again, they were still a little chilly, but that was when Raven shuffled over to the edge of the treehouse and pulled up a bag Anya hadn’t noticed.

“Emergency supplies,” Raven explained. “A sleeping bag and that sort of stuff, I leave it here in case I ever forget to bring something or get cold.”

“Aren’t you worried someone’ll steal it?”

“Do you really think anyone would ever find this place, let alone have the thought to look up in a tree and find my treehouse?” Raven smirked as she unrolled the sleeping bag and turned it into a duvet. “Now, c’mere. Let’s get you all warm and cozy.”

Anya moved over to sit back against the tree again, and smirked back at Raven. “No, you come here.”

Raven rolled her eyes and did as told, though, as she settled into Anya’s lap, she muttered a quiet ‘so bossy’.

“What’d you say?”

“Huh? Nothing.”

“You called me bossy.”

“No I didn’t.”

“Yes, you did.”

Raven draped the sleeping bag around Anya’s shoulders, as well as the blanket, and shushed her. “I never said such a thing.”

“I’m not deaf and you’re a horrible whisperer.”

Raven just rolled her eyes and settled herself deeper into Anya’s lap. “Stop nit-picking and cuddle me.”

Anya laughed and pulled Raven closer, her arms coming to rest around her waist and her hands in Raven’s lap. “And you call me bossy.”

* * *

After a while, they climbed down from the tree, which turned out to be a little bit of a challenge – Raven threw all the bags and the blankets down, and went down first, telling Anya where to put her feet and making sure she was all right. When they came to the base, there was a little bit of a drop, and Anya hopped down first.

She then extended her hands and told Raven to jump into her arms.

“There’s no way that’ll end well,” Raven said suspiciously.

“Trust me?”

Raven slid a little ways down and jumped, and Anya caught her, Raven’s legs wrapping around her waist as she stumbled a little backwards. She didn’t fall, however, and Raven let out a laugh when she realized they hadn’t stumbled over.

“You’re strong,” she commented. “Freakishly strong.”

Anya snuck a kiss and silenced Raven for a long while. “Unlike some of us, I go to the gym on the regular.”

Raven frowned. “I go to the gym.”

“But not regularly.”

“Well…yeah. But I run.”

“That is true.”

“Wanna let me down now?”

“No.”

“Anya, it’s getting dark and there could be coyotes in the woods.”

“That’s a lie, there might be one stray dog, that’s it.”

“Or monsters…”

“Fine, fine. Let’s go home.”

Raven smiled when she was set down, and took Anya’s hand into hers. “Yeah. Let’s go home.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> these idiots are dorks and i love them and also now i want to find an old oak and build a treehouse in it and bang in said treehouse, any volunteers?  
> jokes no im pretty sure if i built a treehouse it would not be safe to be in at all  
> more to come, soon i hope :) two more exams to go and those are at the end of next week so i've got plenty of downtime


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy birthday tumblr anon!  
> ALSO I SURVIVED HIGH SCHOOL I MADE IT THROUGH IM FREE so here's some ranya to celebrate  
> there'll be updates on other things too but i decided to do this one first

Friday came, and with it, the dinner to celebrate the engagement. Anya had to go there straight from work, and came there late, having changed hurriedly at work before rushing to get to the bus. Her hair was a little bit of a mess, and so she braided it, hoping it’d hide the tangles and the fact that it probably reeked of disinfectant.

The dinner was held at Uncle Nyko’s restaurant, a little adorable Greek restaurant with a beautiful outdoor patio and lanterns strung up overhead. When Anya got there, she was already twenty minutes late, and knew her aunt would have something to say of it.

“You’re late,” was her comment when she stood up to give Anya a hug. “I thought we agreed seven o’clock.”

Anya nodded and gave Lexa a hug too. “Sorry, it took a while longer at work. You don’t want to know the details.”

It wasn’t until she sat down that she saw Raven.

The instant she did, her heart stopped, for the very simple reason that Raven looked absolutely _stunning_. Clad in a simple black dress, her hair was curled and thrown over one shoulder, neat and pretty and framing her beautiful face in a way that made Anya forget her words.

The dress was skin-tight and had cutouts on the sides, and a very giving cleavage, and the fact that Raven sat right next to her was of no help to still her racing heart.

“Eyes up here, sailor,” Raven murmured in amusement, giving Anya a little nudge. The table conversation had returned to what it had been before Anya arrived, and so nobody noticed the slight pink of Anya’s cheeks or the knowing smirk on Raven’s lips.

“You look great,” Anya said quietly. “Too great.”

“I know. Figured I’d taunt you a little.”

“That’s cruel.”

“I haven’t seen you for two days. Figured I should remind you what you’re missing out on.”

“And those pictures you sent me, they were for-?”

“What? No, I was just showing you my bra and how cute it was.”

Anya snorted and took a sip from her glass. “Right, and the ones without a bra?”

“To show you how cute _I_ was.”

“Even though I couldn’t see your face?”

“All of me is cute,” Raven reminded her. “Now, shush, let’s talk of something more appropriate.”

Just as she said that, Aunt Indra clinked her glass with her fork and everyone fell silent as she stood up, glass in hand and a smile on her face.

“We’re all here tonight to celebrate my niece, and my future niece-in-law – I’m very aware that it’s not really a thing, but in this case, I think there can be some leniencies.”

The table group chuckled, and Indra turned her eyes then to Lexa, who was looking at her with a mixed expression of embarrassment and joy.

“I know your mother would’ve loved to see you today, and I’m doing all I can to live up to that. And I know I’ve never said this, but she would’ve _loved_ Clarke. She’s perfect for you, Lexa, although she’s pretty stubborn – but, then again, so are you.”

She talked for a while, and at the end, congratulated the happy couple once again. There were congratulations all around, and then came dinner. Conversation ensued, and Raven was drawn to a debate between Octavia and Bellamy, while Anya maintained civil conversation with Nyko and his nephew, Roan. Though they sat side by side, they barely exchanged words – Raven was disappointed to find that each time she snuck a glance at Anya, she was never looking at her, ignoring her altogether. It wasn’t fair, she thought, not when Anya looked so ravishing; even though there were dark circles under her eyes and Raven could tell all Anya really wanted was to go to sleep, she still looked breathtaking in her dark red strapless dress, which left far too much skin exposed for Raven’s liking. Even the braid, messy and adorable, was unfair – it left Anya’s neck bare, making Raven’s desire to press her lips to it and leave marks only grow tenfold with each slight touch of Anya’s slender fingers to her jaw as she nodded along to Nyko’s lengthy description of his cooking.

“Raven?”

Raven’s eyes snapped back to look at Octavia, and she shook her head to clear her mind. “Huh?”

“What are you staring at?”

“Oh, nothing. Just the trees. They look so pretty in the night.”

Octavia let out a laugh, and Raven could see from the corner of her eye that Anya turned to look at them briefly. She dared not look at her then, in fear that it’d make her blush – even so, Octavia’s reaction confused her.

“Are you drunk, Raven?”

“No.”

“You’re staring at trees.”

“They’re very pretty.”

“Pretty like your girlfriend?”

The table was crammed tight – it was only meant for ten people, but there were fifteen of them, and so they were all sitting very snugly, thighs touching thighs on the bench. When Octavia spoke, Raven could feel Anya tensing up beside her, and though she didn’t turn to look, Raven knew Anya was listening.

“What makes you say that?”

“Well, she is pretty, isn’t she? Whoever she is?”

Raven let herself relax when she realized Octavia didn’t know said girlfriend was Anya. “Uh, yeah…really pretty.”

“Good. Who is she?”

“Not telling.”

“Come on, Raven.”

“No way.”

“Not even a hint?”

“No.”

That was when Octavia gave up and turned her attentions to Anya. “Anya. You’re her roommate. Have you seen this mystery girlfriend?”

Raven could feel the tension in Anya’s thigh resting against her own, and bit back a laugh.

“Uh, no,” Anya stammered. “I work a lot, so…”

“Come on!? Really?”

That was when Raven did let out a laugh. “Looks like you’ll have to be patient, O,” she laughed. “Don’t worry, I’ll introduce her soon enough.”

“And when’s that, exactly?”

“After the wedding.”

“After the wedding!? That’s like, four months!”

“I know.”

“You might break up by then.”

“I hope we won’t,” Raven smirked. She threw Anya a sideways glance, one which Octavia missed – Anya only rolled her eyes and gave her a nudge, and Raven laughed, and Octavia’s exhausted groan was ignored by them both.

“Is she blonde? Brunette?”

“She’s got nice hair,” Raven admitted. “When it’s not messy.”

“Tall? Short?”

“I already answered this.”

“Well, is she like a giraffe, or just an inch taller.”

“The second one.”

“Ok. Is it Ontari?”

“What? No!”

Octavia perked up, however. “You’re very quick to deny that,” she began. “Did I get it right? It’s Ontari?”

“No, it’s not Ontari. Ontari’s a bitch.”

“That’s what someone secretly dating her would say.”

“That’s what someone not dating her would say.”

“Sure, sure.”

“O, I’m serious. I’m not dating Ontari, nor would I ever want to.”

“She’s cute, though.”

“And she’s super high maintenance. You do remember that time I had to fix her car and she bitched about _everything?_ ”

“Yeah, sure, but you have no idea what people tolerate to get some good-ass sex.”

“Oh, please, the only thing I have to tolerate is suffocating nighttime cuddles.”

Octavia’s eyes lit up. “You spend nights with her?”

“Yeah?”

“That’s adorable. You sap.”

“Shut up.”

The dinner went by comfortably enough. Being sat so far from her aunt, Anya didn’t have to deal with any uncomfortable questions from her. She wanted to leave, but stuck it out, even through dessert and coffee and ages and ages of talking, until finally at midnight she stood up and said:

“I’m so sorry, but I’m going to pass out soon. It was a lovely dinner, Aunt Indra – thank you, Uncle Nyko, the food was delicious as always. And Lexa – well, I guess I’m seeing you soon enough.”

Lexa laughed and stood up to give her a hug. “You can count on it.”

“I think I’ll give miss sleepyhead here a ride,” Raven said, standing up as well. “Can’t risk her falling asleep in some ditch.”

Anya shot her a glare, but everyone else just laughed, and so they left together, Anya making sure to keep at last two feet in between them for as long as they were in view of the group.

The instant they got to Raven’s car, however, she grabbed her waist and slammed her against it, her lips crashing against Raven’s so roughly they drew a whimper from her lips.

“That dress is dangerous,” Anya growled as she kissed her again, “Too beautiful.”

Raven just kissed her and said nothing, and for a long while, they stood there, in the parking lot, Raven pinned against the car and Anya without a single thought concerning anything other than Raven’s lips on hers.

“We should get home,” Raven finally breathed, hands clasped around Anya’s neck. “We really should.”

“Then would you let go of me?”

Raven pouted, but did so anyway. “You know, your dress is absolutely lethal.”

“Lethal?”

“Smoking hot.”

“Just the dress?”

Raven rolled her eyes and opened the car door for Anya. “Hop in your carriage, Cinderella.”

“Cinderella?”

“You left the party at midnight,” Raven said before closing the door. She circled back around and got into the driver’s seat, and then continued with: “You’re like Cinderella because you left the party at midnight. I don’t know, really, just felt like something funny to say.”

“Are you drunk?”

“I only had half a glass of wine, and that was three hours ago. I’m perfectly good to drive.”

Anya eyed her suspiciously, but Raven ignored her, starting up the car and setting their course for home. For a long while, neither of them spoke, not until Raven put her hand on Anya’s thigh and gave it a little squeeze. “How tired are you?”

“Am I really suffocating?”

Raven furrowed her brows, and glanced at Anya in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“You said, about the cuddles.”

“Oh,” Raven said. “No, no, Anya- I didn’t mean it seriously. It was a joke. Trust me.”

Anya didn’t say anything, and so Raven grabbed her hand, giving it a squeeze as she said: “Honestly, Anya, I love your cuddles. They’re not suffocating at all.”

“I might choke you in your sleep for that joke,” Anya grumbled.

But she didn’t. No, when they got home, Raven took Anya by the hand and led her to her bedroom – by this point, Anya was barely functioning, her muscles were sore and her head was swimming in exhaustion, and so Raven had free reign to gently unzip her dress and take it off of her, to give her shoulder a little gentle kiss before finding her a t-shirt to sleep in and finally leading her to the bed.

“Here’s a little show for you,” she grinned, unzipping her own dress and shimmying out of it, definitely giving Anya a show to remember – what she wore underneath would’ve had Anya pinning her down within seconds were she not so tired, and Raven knew this.

“You’re teasing me,” Anya mumbled as Raven slowly undid her bra and found herself a pair of shorts and a tank top to wear to bed. “You know I’m way too tired.”

“I do,” Raven smiled as she climbed into bed and pushed Anya down to make it easier for her to settle in her arms. “But I’m giving your brain nice ideas for nice dreams.”

“That’s nice,” Anya yawned, turning them over so that she lay on top of Raven. “Now let me sleep. Do not wake me under any circumstance.”

“What if the aliens come?”

“They can wait.”

“The CIA?”

“You can tell them to fuck off,” Anya muttered. “Now shush.”

Raven chuckled and ran her hand up along Anya’s back. “Fine, fine, no need to be so grumpy.”

But Anya was already asleep. Her breaths tickled Raven’s neck, warm and steady, and Raven couldn’t help but smile as she felt Anya wrap her arm around her waist and draw her even nearer in her sleep – she was so oddly clingy in her sleep, in ways she never was when awake, and those moments when Anya slept and Raven didn’t were cherished most by Raven.

“My grumpy sleepy girlfriend,” Raven whispered, pressing a gentle kiss to Anya’s forehead. “Mine.”

What she didn’t know that Anya was briefly woken by that, and heard those words – with her face pressed into Raven’s neck, she was able to conceal the smile that spread onto her sleepy lips, and when she pressed a little kiss to Raven’s neck, Raven was already asleep.

“Mine,” she repeated, yawning as she settled a little upwards and held Raven close. Within minutes, she was asleep again, comfortably settled in Raven’s arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> anya is adorable and clingy in a grumpy way and i love her too much


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know it's been months but bear with me, writer's block can be a bitch
> 
> and besides, i'm back, with more ranya than you could imagine
> 
> i've got clexa things coming too but i had this chapter basically waiting already so here you go

Almost two months after the engagement party, Raven got together with Octavia to plan Clarke’s bachelorette party. She hoped she wouldn’t have to answer questions about her girlfriend, but, as she had already known, Octavia couldn’t be dissuaded.

“I need to know, Raven, it’s killing me. You’ve been together for like four months.”

“Three, a little over, probably,” Raven shrugged. “You’ll know, at some point. But let’s just stick to the task, okay?”

“Oh, please, you know we’re practically done. We drag her down to the Ark, make sure there’s a chick and dude stripper, and we make sure she doesn’t call Lexa while drunk. Oh, and we make sure there’s plenty of tequila. Simple. She’s easy to throw a party for.”

“True.”

“So, okay, if you’re not going to tell me who she is, at least tell me how it’s been going?”

Raven shrugged. “Good. She’s…it’s good.”

“Just good?”

“It’s easy. It’s been a few months and it’s…easy.”

“That’s good, right?”

“Very good.”

“Would you adopt a cat with her?”

“What?”

“Just answer the question.”

“I don’t think she’s a cat person,” Raven answered. “I don’t think I am one either.”

“Well how about a dog?”

“I don’t know. Probably, yeah. She likes the outdoors.”

Raven didn't tell Octavia, but she grinned just then at the sheer thought of Anya with a puppy.

“Does she like coffee or tea?”

“Both. She needs coffee in the mornings. Otherwise it’s tea. She likes to stay healthy.”

“Oh so it’s because of _her_ that you’ve started eating fruit?”

“I guess? She made me try them and my skin started looking better, so,” Raven shrugged. “I can admit defeat, sometimes.”

“Does she come over to your place?”

“Sometimes,” Raven smirked, even adding a wink, making Octavia groan. “What? You asked.”

“And how do you do it with Anya there?”

Raven almost stumbled then.

Almost.

“We don’t. She’s at work a lot, remember?”

“Oh, right.”

“Will she be your plus one?”

“What?”

“To the wedding.”

“I…I don’t know,” Raven shrugged. “I’ll have to ask.”

 

* * *

 

“Well?”

Anya glanced at Raven and shrugged. “I don’t know.”

“How come?”

“Aunt Indra will lose her shit.”

“In a good way or bad way?”

“Good, but in an annoying way. You don’t want to have to deal with it.”

“But-“ Raven sighed. “Okay, I don’t want to pressure you or anything, but Octavia’s getting very pestering. And Clarke’s clearly upset that I’m not telling her, even though she says she’s fine with it…”

Anya raised her eyebrows. “Raven, you’re stalling.”

“Can’t we tell people?”

“I…” Anya paused for a second. “Let me think about it.”

“So that’s a no.”

“No, I just…it’s a big step, you know?”

“Anya, we live together.”

“Okay, but what if we break up?”

“Wouldn’t it be better that people knew?”

“No,” Anya sighed. “It- they’d have to pick sides. And Clarke’s your best friend, but she’s marrying my sister – it could get messy. I…I don’t want to rush.”

Raven nodded slowly. “Got it…yeah, no, I get it.”

“And besides,” Anya began. “I had something I needed to talk to you about. Can you sit down?”

“Sure, yeah.”

Raven sat down by Anya on the couch and looked at her carefully. “You look worried. What’s wrong?”

“Nothing- well, I don’t know,” Anya sighed. “It’s just…I got offered a job.”

“That’s good, right?”

“It’s in DC.”

“What?”

Anya nodded and sighed. “I haven’t accepted it yet, I just…I needed to tell you.”

“Yeah, of course,” Raven stammered. “I- DC? That’s across the country.”

“I know.”

“How’d you even get offered the job?”

Anya sighed again and looked away. “I…Polis was supposed to be a pit stop for me. A year at most, and, well…”

“It’s almost been a year,” Raven finished for her.

She hadn’t known about this. Anya had never mentioned it, never even insinuated that she was thinking about leaving, not until this moment. There hadn’t even been a hint that she was ready to leave.

Raven knew in an instant that she hated it. She absolutely, completely hated the idea of Anya leaving.

“I haven’t made a decision yet,” Anya continued. “I forgot I was still on the applications list, but then they called me from DC, and…”

“And what?”

“It’s got good prospects, Raven. Better hours. Better pay. I can’t just discard it like that, I- I need good reasons.”

Anya didn’t know what she wanted Raven to say in that moment. She didn’t even know what she wanted. There were feelings involved now, and she knew she had to remain rational. But she also knew that she had to involve Raven. She knew she had no other choice than to tell her, even though she didn’t even know what she wanted herself.

“But, wait – Lexa’s here. Your aunt lives here. And I-“

“You live here,” Anya nodded. “I know.”

“Aren’t those good enough reasons?”

“They’re good reasons,” Anya admitted. “But I have to be rational-“

“Rational?”

“Raven, please don’t get upset.”

“I’m not upset,” Raven muttered. “You’re just being rational, I get it.”

“Raven, listen – I’m only just thinking about it. Maybe I shouldn't have said anything yet, since I'm only considering-”

“Which means it’s not an easy decision for you. I get it.”

Raven didn’t want to be upset. But she was.

“I don’t want to have any regrets,” Anya said quietly. “Whichever path I choose.”

“I get it, Anya – but you can probably also understand why I might be a little overwhelmed, right? I mean, everything’s good here, comfortable, easy, and then I find out you never meant to stay-“

“Just in the beginning, now I…I have to think about it.”

“I’ll leave you to it,” Raven muttered, standing up. “To thinking.”

“Where are you going?”

“Out, for a walk,” Raven replied, grabbing her coat and slipping on her shoes. “I have to cool down.”

Anya nodded and said nothing to stop her. She knew she’d be back.

Raven already had her hand on the handle when she turned around to look at Anya. “Why is it a hard choice for you?”

“I-“

“Anya, please, just tell me. We can talk it over later, but I just want to know.”

Anya sighed. “I just want to know if this…if staying, if it’s worth it.”

“And why wouldn’t it be?”

“I don’t want to tell people because I don’t want to rush. And I don’t want to rush because I-“

She faltered and fell silent, causing Raven to genuinely get worried.

“Anya, what?”

“I need to know whether this’ll work. Us.”

Raven sighed. “You can’t know something like that.”

“I know.”

“I’m going,” Raven muttered. “But I’ll be back, okay?”

Quickly as she could, before she had time to look at Anya, she got out of the apartment – and nearly ran into Lexa.

“Oh, hey,” Raven stammered. “Um- Anya’s inside. I gotta go.”

She rushed off, not bothering to even look back, leaving Lexa to stand in the doorway to Anya’s apartment in genuine surprise. She looked at Raven’s disappearing form for a while, and then looked at Anya with raised brows.

“What was that about?”

She got in and closed the door, and though Anya clearly tried to conceal it, Lexa saw her wipe away a tear.

“Nothing.”

“Anya, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Anya repeated, standing up and heading over to the kitchen. “Tea?”

“Anya-”

“I’m fine,” Anya snapped. “It’s fine.”

“Say ‘I’m fine’ one more time and I’m throwing a pillow at you. You’re not fine.”

“I can’t talk about it with you,” Anya sighed. “It’s…I can’t.”

“I’m your sister,” Lexa said quietly, coming over and taking the cup from Anya’s hands. “Now come on, let’s go sit down, and you tell me what’s going on. Okay?”

Anya let Lexa lead her to the couch and sit her down, but said nothing even after an uncomfortable silence had fallen over the two of them. Anya fiddled with her hands, unsure of what to say, but couldn’t quite form the right words. She wanted to tell Lexa what was wrong, she really did – but she also didn’t, she wasn’t sure she could, whether she even knew how to explain what she was feeling.

But, after a while, she realized that she had to tell her, or otherwise she would burst into tears.

“Look, Lexa,” Anya sighed. “You can’t tell anyone.”

Lexa didn’t even ask before nodding. “Of course.”

“Especially not Clarke.”

“Okay…”

“No, Lexa, promise.”

“I promise.”

Anya took a deep breath and thought the words over in her head.

_I’m dating your fiancee’s best friend._

“You know how Raven has that… girlfriend. Right?”

“Right…?”

“And no one knows who she is.”

“Where are you going with this?”

“I’ve been dating Raven. I’m the girlfriend.”

Lexa’s eyes widened. “What!? No-”

Anya just nodded. “Yeah.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

“Seriously? This has been going on under our noses for months?”

Anya shrugged and looked away. “Yeah.”

“Wait…”

Lexa recalled how tense Raven had looked when she’d left, and quickly realized why Anya was upset. Or, at least, part of the cause.

“What did Raven do?”

Anya sighed. “She didn’t do anything.”

“Then what’s wrong? You look like you’re about to cry and I haven’t seen you cry since-“

“I know, I know,” Anya muttered. “I just got offered a job in DC.”

“That’s…”

“No, let me explain. I never intended on staying in Polis. Not when I came, I mean. I think you knew-“

“Yeah, I did.”

“But Raven didn’t, and now with the job offer, I- I don’t know what to choose.”

“Is it a better job?”

“Yes.”

“Better pay?”

“Yes.”

“But your home is here.”

“Yes.”

“So what’s the problem?”

“The problem is that Raven got upset and I just- I need to be rational, Lexa.”

“Rational about what?”

“About Raven.”

“What about her? She’s cute and fun and I’m sure you two work in your own weird way-“

“But we’re so different.”

“Oh.”

“What do you mean ‘oh’?”

Lexa sighed and turned to face Anya. “Don’t you go ruining this.”

“What?”

“You’re trying to talk yourself out of this relationship because you’re getting out of your comfort zone.”

“Am not-“

“You are, Anya, I’ve seen you do this a million times and I’m sick of it. Your job here is good. Your family is here. You have friends here. You have a _girlfriend_ here. You’re staying, end of discussion.”

“But what if I stay and we break up?”

“Then you can crash on my couch until you find a new place. Anya, come on, be rational. For real.”

“I am being rational.”

Lexa shook her head. “No, you’re being stupid.”

“I’m not.”

“You’re worrying about a potential breakup so much you might move across the country just to avoid it.”

“Well if I move I’ll have to break up anyway-“

“You’re not moving, Anya. Please,” Lexa sighed. “I don’t want you to go.”

“I can’t just-“

“Anya. I know you could get a job a thousand times better if you wanted, whenever you wanted. You’re smart. You don’t _have_ to take this DC job. So please, don’t go.”

Anya remained silent for a while. “It’s just- it’s scary.”

“What is?”

“This…with Raven.”

“How come?”

“It’s so easy.”

Lexa let out a gentle laugh. “That’s wonderful, not scary.”

“But- I don’t want it to end.”

“Anya, I know you’re a pessimist, but get a grip – you’re happy with Raven right now. It won’t end today, I’m sure of it, so just…relax. Stay here. Work here. Be with Raven. And if you do break up, well – then that’ll be that. But I don’t think that’ll happen.”

“Why?”

“Because Raven’s practically been glowing for the past few months. And you – well, I didn’t guess you were in a relationship, but you seemed settled. Comfortable. Like you were happy – okay, no, like you _are_ happy.”

“I am comfortable. And happy.”

“Then don’t worry, okay? It’s not like you’re sacrificing your career. You’re just staying where your home is.”

Anya sighed and leaned back. “I upset Raven, though.”

“Don’t worry,” Lexa chuckled. “She’s probably with Clarke right now.”

“How do you know?”

“Because Clarke texted me five minutes ago telling me I’m not allowed to come home for a while.”

 

* * *

 

Lexa wasn’t wrong. Raven had gone straight to Clarke after leaving her apartment, hadn’t even thought about going elsewhere – she had to talk to someone, and the best someone to talk to that she knew was Clarke.

She felt like the ground had fallen from beneath her feet. The thought of Anya leaving was scary to her, terrifying even, and she didn’t want to even think about it – and yet, it was all she could think about.

She understood why Anya was considering it. She really did.

But she also hated the fact that there was a chance Anya would choose the job over her. It didn’t matter how slim the chance was – she hated it.

“I need to talk.”

That was all it took for Clarke to know that something was wrong.

“Come in, sit down,” she said, eyeing Raven carefully. “What’s wrong?”

Raven shrugged and sat down, sighing deeply as she did. “It’s complicated.”

“Okay...whiskey complicated or no?”

“No, not whiskey complicated. It’s…” Raven let out a sigh. “Don’t tell Octavia. Or anyone. Definitely not Lexa.”

“Done deal. My lips are sealed.”

“I- I’ve been dating Anya. She’s my – ‘ _the’_ girlfriend.”

“I knew it!” Clarke cried – and immediately regretted it. “Sorry, wrong reaction – but I knew it.”

“What do you mean you knew it?” Raven asked, suddenly worried. “Were we that obvious?”

“What? Oh, no- that’s what threw me off. I just guessed it, sort of. She’s totally your type, and it makes sense, not to mention you were so clearly jealous when she was going out with that nurse-“

“Okay, I get it,” Raven groaned. “Does anyone else know?”

“No.”

“Does Lexa know?”

“Listen, Anya’s not as easy to read as you are, and Lexa can’t read you like I can. So I’m going to say no, but I’m not sure.”

“Okay, good – Anya can’t know I told you. She doesn’t want people to know yet.”

“But you told me.”

“Yes,” Raven sighed. “I had to, because I just- we fought.”

“Oh?”

“It wasn’t really a fight but I got upset and I just- I just needed someone to talk to.”

“That’s what I’m here for.”

“I know.”

“So, tell me what happened.”

And Raven did. She told Clarke about Anya’s job offer, and their conversation, and about how shitty it had made her feel – she talked for a long while, just rambled, and Clarke let her, knowing she’d come to a stop at some point.

When she did, it was Clarke’s turn to talk.

“You can be upset, Raven,” she said. “It’s…well, I don’t know Anya very well. But I do know that she’s had a terrible history with dating. And it just sounds like she’s being extra careful not to mess up with you.”

“She’s considering _leaving_. I don’t- I don’t want her to go,” Raven muttered. “She’s- I-“

Clarke smiled gently and gave her arm a reassuring squeeze. “I know. You almost want to say it but you’re not quite there, are you?”

“Say what?”

“You know what I mean.”

“No, I don’t,” Raven frowned. “I’m just confused now.”

“The ‘I love you’, Raven,” Clarke smiled. “That’s what I mean.”

“Oh. _Oh._ ”

“But you’re not quite there yet?”

“Um, no- well, I haven’t thought of it. No. It’s too soon – right?”

“Lexa said I love you on our second date.”

“I know, but that was an accident, and besides, you two are like a match made in heaven, or something cheesy like that.”

“Still, she said it – and now we’re getting married.”

Raven sighed. “We’ve been together for a little over three months. Closer to four now, I think. But we’ve been roommates for almost over a year.”

“So maybe it isn’t too soon.”

“Maybe.”

“But don’t worry about that, Raven,” Clarke reminded her. “Just go to her and tell her you don’t want her to go. Tell her you want to stay with her. It’ll be fine.”

“But what if she leaves anyway?”

“She won’t. I’ll have Lexa talk some sense into her. There’s no way she could pick a job over family and friends and you, most of all – she’s not dumb.”

Raven just sighed and picked at the hem of her shirt. “I guess.”

Clarke wrapped an arm around her and hugged her carefully. “Listen, it’ll be fine. Do you want me to come over for moral support?”

“No-“

“Do you want me to drive you? Lexa’s over there anyway, she’ll give me a ride home.”

Raven wiped at her eye and let out a laugh. “You think you can get my car to work?”

“I can try.”

 

* * *

 

Raven did let Clarke come along for moral support after all. She didn’t mean to, but then, in the parking lot, everything felt too overwhelming, and she didn’t even have to ask for Clarke to offer. The blonde knew her too well - it was annoying at times, but at this instance, it was only a good thing.

“Come on, Raven. Just…go in.”

Raven sighed. “Is Lexa still there?”

“Probably.”

“Do you think she’s talked to Anya? ‘Cause when I left, Anya was a little upset, or a lot, I don’t know-“

She was interrupted by the door opening and revealing a confused Lexa, staring at them both. “What are you two muttering about?”

“Nothing,” they said in unison.

Raven cleared her throat and tried to peer over Lexa’s shoulder into the apartment. “Is Anya…is she here?”

“Yeah, she’s here, she’s been waiting for you.”

“Great, we’ll be going then,” Clarke interjected, grabbing Lexa’s arm and dragging her out. “Good luck, Raven.”

“What-?” Lexa stammered, but it was too late – Clarke had already shoved Raven inside and shut the door behind her, leaving Lexa and Clarke in the hall with no way of getting back in.

“Why’d you do that?”

Clarke shrugged. “Raven needs to talk to Anya.”

Lexa frowned. “And why would she need to talk to Anya?”

For a brief moment, Clarke studied Lexa’s face – and then gasped. “You _know_!”

“Know what?”

“Lexa, you’re a terrible liar,” Clarke chuckled. “You know what I’m talking about.”

“I do not,” Lexa huffed. “Not a clue.”

“Raven and Anya-“ Clarke began, but Lexa clamped her hand over her mouth to stop her.

“Shh-! Someone might hear.”

“So you _do_ know.”

“Yeah, yes, I know, Anya told me- Raven told you?”

“Yes.”

Lexa let out a breath. “Thank god, I was worried I’d have to keep a secret from you.”

“Lex, you can’t even lie to me. I would’ve found out so fast-“

“Shut up.”

“You think they’re alright in there?”

“We should go-“

“Yeah, we should definitely go. They'll figure it out.”

 

* * *

 

The moment Raven was shoved inside the apartment, she came face-to-face with Anya. She stood just a few feet from her, looking wary and confused, and for an agonizingly long minute, neither of them said anything. Anya played with the hairbands on her wrist, while Raven simply shuffled on her feet, chewing her lip, both of them trying their best to think of something to say.

It was Raven who finally broke the silence.

“Look, Anya, I’m so sorry, but I told Clarke about us, I had to, but we talked it through and I don’t want you to go. To DC. I…you have your job here, and your family, and your friends, and- and-“

“And you,” Anya finished quietly. “I know. And I told Lexa, so we’re even.”

Raven glanced at her carefully. “Are you going to go?”

“No.”

“No?”

“No,” Anya sighed. “I- I shouldn’t have even brought it up. I just…I always leave. Lexa more or less yelled me about it, told me I was being stupid, and, well…”

“Thank god it worked,” Raven muttered, taking a few steps and closing in the distance to engulf Anya in a hug. “Because otherwise I would’ve had to yell at you and that would’ve ended terribly.”

“It would’ve.”

“But why did you even consider it, in the first place?”

Anya shrugged. “I- I don’t know where this is going. Us. And if I left now, it’d be easy to just get away…before things started hurting. But I thought it wouldn’t hurt now, but I was wrong…so wrong. I knew it the moment I started saying it to you but it was too late- I’m sorry. About it. The whole thing.”

Raven just hugged her tighter. “You’re staying here. In this apartment. And I have all these great dates planned out so you have to stay with me, because otherwise you’ll miss out on everything-“

“I’m not going, Raven.”

“I know.”

“This was our first fight,” Anya stated after a while.

“Well-“

“Okay, maybe not, but our first proper fight as a couple.”

“Okay, that’s true,” Raven agreed.

“We handled it okay, right?”

“No, Clarke and Lexa handled it okay,” Raven chuckled. “Lexa gave you a reality check and Clarke basically told me to tell you what I thought and just be honest, and it worked.”

“And now they know.”

“Yeah.”

“Any chance they won’t tease us about this?”

“No. We’re in for a fuckton of puns and teasing and jokes.”

Anya sighed and ran her hand through Raven’s hair. “I’m sorry I made you get upset.”

“It’s alright," Raven mumbled. "Just don't give me any scares like that for a while, okay?" 


	14. Chapter 14

Just a few days later, it was Octavia’s birthday.

As per usual, Clarke dragged Raven to Octavia’s apartment at the asscrack of dawn to surprise her with cupcakes and booze, and flowers – it was basically tradition at this point, as was the fact that each year, Raven refused to get up. She knew exactly what was going to happen, and in her comfortable bed of warmth and coziness and sleep, the last thing she wanted was to go on a hike.

But Octavia was active, and always wanted to drag her friends out on hikes and trips involving tremendous amounts of physical exercise. With Clarke and Raven being not-too enthusiastic about such things, they had resolved the issue by promising to go on whatever hike or trip Octavia wanted on an annual basis, on her birthday.

Which was why Clarke stood outside Raven’s apartment in the outdoorsiest clothes she owned, her backpack waiting in the car with enough snacks to last through an apocalypse.

She knocked on the door three times before barging in with her own key.

“I’m coming for you, Reyes,” she warned, marching over to Raven’s bedroom.

But there was no one there.

“What the fuck-“

And then Clarke remembered, and turned on her heel to march over to Anya’s bedroom. Sure enough, there, in bed, lay Raven, completely tangled up in Anya, face hidden in her boobs and one hand hanging limply over the edge of the bed.

Clarke paused for a second to gather her courage before walking over to give Raven’s hand a nudge. “Raven. Hey, Raven.”

Raven just mumbled something in her sleep and burrowed even deeper into Anya’s arms. Anya, on the other hand, cracked an eye open, and upon seeing Clarke, frowned.

“Clarke?”

Clarke jumped at the angry look on Anya’s face. “Sorry to wake you, but I’m here to collect Raven.”

“For what?”

“Our annual hiking trip with Octavia.”

“Oh, right,” Anya yawned. “She packed last night, her bag’s somewhere over there. I redid her packing because she packed none of the right things, so if she wonders about it, tell her.”

“Can you wake her up? We gotta get going, Octavia wants to go to the mountains and it’s a two hour drive, and a four hour hike after that, and she wants to get to the site early so that we can set up the tent and all-“

Anya nodded and yawned again before leaning in to speak into Raven’s ear.

“Wake up, dummy,” she said, in a louder voice than what Clarke had expected. When Raven opened her eyes and frowned a moment later, Clarke thought she was done – but no, the moment Raven saw Clarke, she groaned and hid her face again.

“No, not this year, ple-ease-“

“Raven, you promised.”

“But I’m so tired-“

Anya sighed. “Raven, get off of me, I want to sleep.”

Raven did no such thing, and so Anya rolled over to leave Raven on her back before rolling back to lay where she’d been in the first place.

“There, take her,” Anya mumbled, turning to her side and pulling the covers to herself. “And shush.”

Raven, suddenly left outside the warmth of the covers, groaned as she realized there was no other choice for her but to get up.

Clarke was already on her way out of the bedroom when she paused to glance over her shoulder, just in time to catch Raven giving Anya a soft kiss and a murmured ‘see you in two days’. When Raven caught her watching, she frowned, but Clarke just smirked and snuck out before Raven had time to grab a pillow and chuck it at her.

“Not a word to Octavia,” Raven reminded her in the car. “I’ll tell her, but not now, today’s her birthday-“

“What if she asks you to tell her as a birthday present?”

Raven paused. “Then I guess- I guess I’ll tell her? I don’t know, she’ll flip, and today’s about her, right?”

“And suffering,” Clarke joked. “No, but the hike this year shouldn’t be too bad. Octavia said it would be four hours, which means six with out lack of experience and your whining-“

“I don’t whine that much-“

“Anyway, we’ll be there by sunset. And then there’ll be the campfire and smores and booze and fun-“

“And I’ll get to sleep with your elbow in my face.”

“Hey!”

“Clarke, I know the tent is cramped, but I honestly don’t know how Lexa can stand sleeping with you in the same bed when you’re so clingy.”

“And what about you, then? Your face was buried in Anya’s-“

“Okay, fine,” Raven interrupted. “Okay. I get your point.”

“It’s adorable, you and her.”

“Shut up.”

“What? You are cute. I’m just happy for you.”

“Just shut up and let me drink my coffee,” Raven grumbled. But behind the cup Clarke could see the hint of a smile so wide it made her eyes shine, and the smile was so contagious Clarke couldn’t help but smile herself.

 

* * *

 

“Happy birthday, O!”

Octavia stood in the doorway ready to receive the presents and flowers, all decked out in her hiking gear, ready for action.

“Do I have to rearrange you guys’s backpacks again?”

Clarke shook her head. “I’m pretty sure not.”

“Heavy things near your back, light things on top and on the outside-?”

“Yup, checked and done, Lexa did my packing, and Anya-“

Clarke bit her tongue when she realized she’d mentioned Anya’s name. She glanced at Raven, expecting to see her glaring at her, but Raven looked as smooth as ever as she continued where Clarke had left off.

“Anya packed mine, she said she had experience and I had to beg her to help, but…I think I’ll get away with minimal shoulder pains this time.”

Thankfully, Octavia missed the angry look Raven threw Clarke after she’d spoken.

Clarke didn’t, and mouthed a quick ‘sorry’ to her before following Octavia to the kitchen for a proper breakfast.

The fact that Raven opted for oatmeal with fresh fruits was missed by neither Octavia or Clarke. They both stared at Raven in equal amounts of astonishment as Raven prepared her breakfast, and when she glanced up with the intention of asking if anyone else wanted any fruit, she found her two friends staring at her with looks of almost concern.

“What?”

“You’re…you’re eating healthy,” Clarke stammered. “Fruit? Oatmeal? Green tea?”

“Who _are_ you?” Octavia exclaimed, coming over around the kitchen isle to knock at Raven’s temple. “And what have you done to our friend?”

Raven rolled her eyes. “Am I not allowed to eat healthy?”

“No, you’re supposed to be the one who makes it easy for us to justify eating that extra cupcake,” Clarke quipped. “But seriously, it’s good, but it’s weird.”

Raven just tossed a banana string at Clarke, and then at Octavia, and after a brief food war the three of them finished up their breakfast and piled into Clarke’s car to head up to the mountains.

Raven called dibs on driving in hopes that it would get her away from Octavia’s pestering questions.

It didn’t.

“When are you going to introduce me to your girlfriend?”

Raven sighed. “When it’s not your birthday,” she told her. “Today’s about you.”

“But I want to know, so badly-“

“I haven’t asked her if she wants people to know,” Raven sighed. “O, you get it, right?”

“I do,” Octavia muttered. “But I’m so curious. She’s got you eating healthy and looking healthy, and you’re clearly happy, so I just want to know who this goddess is so that I can ask if she has a sister that Bell could date.”

Both Clarke and Raven laughed at that.

“She doesn’t have an available sister,” Raven told Octavia. “Sorry.”

“Darn. He could use someone to drag him on morning runs.”

“Well, how about you?”

“What about me?”

“How’s your handsome boy?”

Octavia groaned. “Stop calling him that.”

“What? He’s male, and he’s handsome-“

“If you weren’t driving I’d smack you-”

“Do it anyway,” Clarke quipped from the back seat. “She’s the best driver of all of us, she won’t drive off the road.”

“How about no-one bothers the driver and the passengers calm the fuck down?” Raven suggested. “Sheesh, all I said is that your man is handsome-“

Octavia laughed. “Well, he is.”

“And? Any developments?”

“What do you mean?”

“Tying the knot?”

“Rae, shut up.”

“Well, those two are already doing it, you might as well-“

“Not yet. It’s not time.”

Raven nodded. “Got it.”

“But we _are_ thinking about getting a puppy.”

Clarke and Raven’s reaction came in unison.

“Oh my god!”

“Seriously?” Clarke asked. “Because if you’re getting a puppy, you’ll have to be prepared for Lexa to show up a lot, because she fuckin’ loves dogs-“

“And you’re not letting her get a puppy,” Raven reminded her.

“Not that, it’s just our apartment – we can’t keep a dog.”

“Then move.”

“But our apartment is so nice…”

“Clarke, you’re getting married. Get a proper house, I know there’ll be babies in no time anyway, so-“

“No, no way,” Clarke laughed. “Not yet. Maybe in five years, but not now. Right now I just want to travel and do art and not have baby puke on my shoulder.”

“Wow, you make motherhood seem so wonderful,” Octavia pointed out.

“It’ll happen some day,” Clarke sighed. “Just not now. I’m still a kid myself.”

“And that’s smart,” Raven agreed. Octavia, too, nodded. “Because,” Raven added, “If you had kids, you wouldn’t be able to go on a booze-infused hiking-fest with your two besties whenever you wanted.”

\--

The hike was beautiful. The path they followed winded through lush forests and over rushing rivers, through clear-watered creeks and up ridges full of meadows bursting with flowers almost at their full bloom – it was May, it was still a little cool, but the flowers were blooming, and the smell of life and fresh air and new leaves and rain surrounded them in a way that could only be described as invigorating.

The beauty of their surroundings, however, was significantly overshadowed by the increasing ache of their shoulders.

Octavia seemed fine, but she was accustomed to the pain. Clarke and Raven, however, despite having been on more than one hike on an annual basis for some years now, always suffered the same pains.

“I swear to god,” Raven panted at the top of a particularly high ridge, “That if I sit down now, I’ll never get back up.”

“Good. Then don’t sit down,” Octavia smiled.

“I have to, my legs are jelly. That was steep.”

Clarke was already laying on the ground groaning about her aching legs and sore back. “Just give us five minutes.”

“You can have ten, we only have four miles to go,” Octavia said, crouching down to let her bag down off of her shoulders. “Here, Rae, I’ll help you out.”

The freedom of having her shoulders all to herself forced a pleased groan from Raven’s throat. “God, I never want that on my back ever again.”

“Four more miles,” Octavia reminded her. “And it’s not that big of a climb, a slow steady rise, but then we’ll be at the camp site. We don’t even have to hike down for water, there’s a spring right at the site.”

Raven groaned in pain when Octavia helped the backpack back onto her shoulders. “Why does this weigh so much?”

“Because we’re going to be here for two nights,” Octavia told her. “And we need food. And clothes. And a tent-“

“Okay, okay, I get it,” Raven sighed. “Let’s go before Clarke falls asleep standing.

 

* * *

 

When they did finally reach the camp site, Raven did have to admit that it was worth it. There was a creek a short walk from the field where they began setting up their tent, a ready-made site for a fire, and a magnificent view. The mountain stood behind them, and in the west the sky was already turning a soft shade of peach in anticipation of the coming sunset, and the flowers in the field swayed gently in the slight wind that passed over the mountainside.

Once they’d set up their tent, Raven decided to walk a little further, just to explore where they’d come. Walking felt so free when there wasn’t twelve pounds of weight on her back, and she skipped a little while before coming to a stop in a patch of beautiful blue and pink flowers, lit golden by the setting sun.

The smell of the flowers in the cooling evening made Raven’s head feel clearer than it had in a long while, and, on a whim, she took a picture of herself and the view with her phone and sent it to Anya.

**Raven (05:47 p.m.)**

_Anya I miss you and I want you to give me a good long massage when I get home because I have endured a hellish marathon and I deserve it <3_

Just a few seconds later, Raven received a text message.

But it wasn’t from Anya.

**Octavia (05:48 p.m.)**

_RAVEN WHAT THE FUCK IT’S ANYA???_

Raven paled and looked at the name on top of the conversation she’d sent the picture to.

She could’ve sworn she’d sent the picture to Anya.

She’d been so sure.

“Oh fuck-“

She ran back to the campsite to find a fuming Octavia waiting for her, arms crossed and one foot tapping expectantly.

“O, I- that was an accident, I-“

Clarke was laughing so hard she had to hold her stomach.

“I can _not_ believe you didn’t tell me!” Octavia cried. “It was Anya? The whole fucking time- she was right there so many times when I asked you about your girlfriend!?”

“Octavia, I swear to god-“

“Raven Maria Eleonora Reyes,” Octavia snapped, “You lied right to my face! And you made me look like such an idiot, and you’re dating Anya, of all people- why didn’t you just tell me?”

“Octavia, calm down,” Raven laughed. “Seriously. I’m sorry I lied, but Anya didn’t want to come out so soon-“

“Clarke knew! I know she knew, she didn’t look nearly as shocked as I was when I showed her your text-“

“I had to tell her, but she’s only known a few days-“

“Why didn’t you tell me when you told her?”

“Because Anya and I had a fight and I just had to go to Clarke to talk it out, ok? It’s just-“

Octavia faltered. “Just what?”

“Listen, O, you know I love you, but Clarke’s dating Lexa. Clarke knows Anya better than you, so I went to her and not you, I’m sorry-“

“No, I’m not mad about that, I know that there’s two best friends and it’s not like you can pick both of us, I’m mad about the fact that you managed to keep a secret so well and also I’m in shock-“ Octavia shook her head. “Anya? Really?”

“No, really,” Clarke interjected. “They’re a thing. And it’s grossly adorable.”

“Will you please forgive me, Octavia my love?” Raven begged, exaggerating her expressions and words deliberately to make Octavia laugh. “Ple-ease, I can’t live with you mad at me-“

Octavia gave Raven a gentle punch on the shoulder and wrapped her in a hug. “Shut up, idiot, I’m not really mad at you. But I’ll forgive you if you tell me everything. Spare me no detail.”

“Even the-“

“Yes, even the sex. You owe me that,” Octavia said, pulling away and walking over to the fire. “We’ve got all night, and we’ve got booze.”

“I don’t know-“

“Oh, no, you’re doing this,” Clarke said, pushing Raven towards the seats. “I haven’t heard nearly enough, I want to know this too.”

Raven sighed and succumbed to her fate. “Fine. What do you want to know?”

 

* * *

 

An hour later, they were all sufficiently drunk, and Raven had let slip most of what she dared to tell her friends about Anya.

She didn’t tell everything. When the questions had turned to a more dirty nature, Raven had tastefully kept her answers ambiguous, resulting in a very annoyed Clarke and an amused Octavia.

“You were never like this with Finn,” Octavia sighed, wrapping an arm around Raven’s shoulders and leaning into her. “You’re so happy it oozes out of your pores.”

“That sounds gross.”

“Newsflash, love is gross, but it’s great,” Clarke laughed. “Also, stop necking, I feel left out.”

Raven just laughed and reached over for Clarke’s hand, dragging her into the sort-of hug that they were having.

“This is great,” she sighed a while later, when all three of them were laying on a blanket in the field, staring at the stars. “I never- I never thought it’d be like this.”

“Like what?”

“Me, gay. With a girlfriend. And you guys being so chill about it-“

“Oh, no, we’re not chill,” Octavia interrupted. “We’re freaking out. Your girlfriend is making you eat healthy, Raven. And you’re clearly in better shape, too.”

“Oh shut up.”

“No, we’re serious,” Clarke interjected. “We won’t be chill about this for a long while. Better just get used to it.”

“I might be,” Raven yawned. “But Anya isn’t. So just…don’t freak her out, okay?”

It was in that moment that Raven realized she hadn’t actually texted Anya once that day. “Shit, hold on, I have to text her to let her know I’m not dead-“

She pulled her phone out and turned to her side so that the two nosy girls by her didn’t see what she typed.

**Raven (10:37 p.m.)**

_Sorry, it’s been hectic today. I’m alive. Accidentally sent a text meant to you to O, so she knows. Didn’t kill me, so we’re all good. I love you._

Raven sent the text before realizing she’d said ‘I love you’ at the end.

When she did realize it, it was way too late for her to undo it.

“Oh, shit,” she cursed.

“What? What’d you do?”

Raven glanced at her friends and made a face. “I texted ‘love you’ without thinking-“

“Oh my god! Yes!”

“I didn’t mean to!” Raven cried. “She’s probably going to think it’s too soon-“

That was when she received a text message.

“I can’t open it. What if she ignores it? What if she tells me to slow down?”

Clarke glanced at Octavia, who shrugged. “I’ll read it and tell you.”

“I can’t-“

“Then read it, Raven.”

Raven’s thumb missed the button twice before she finally managed to open up the text.

**Anya (10:39 p.m.)**

_Glad you’re alive. Can I call you?_

Raven scrambled up to her feet and darted off to the side, leaving Clarke and Octavia to watch after her in equal amounts of confusion.

“Hey,” Raven sighed, once Anya picked up. “I’m sorry I said the- I didn’t mean it, I’m drunk, I wasn’t thinking-“

“Raven, shut up,” Anya laughed. “I love you too. There’s nothing to apologize for.”

“Jesus fucking Christ, Anya, don’t scare me like that,” Raven groaned. “I thought you were going to dump me-“

“I’d never do that,” Anya interjected. “I just missed your voice.”

Raven’s heart did about six somersaults before she gathered herself enough to reply. “You’re turning into a sappy sap.”

“And you’re drunk.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“I’m gonna go,” Raven said, glancing at Clarke and Octavia, “I’m being spied on.”

“Don’t die.”

“I won’t.”

“I’ll see you in a day.”

“Love you.”

“Love you.”

“Hang up.”

“No, you hang up.”

“I’ll hang up,” Raven sighed. “Bye.”

She hung up and immediately became incredibly aware of the fact that Clarke and Octavia looked like they were about to explode.

“What?”

“You just said I love you for the first time,” Clarke cried giddily. “Our little girl is growing up into a romantic,” she said, her words directed to Octavia. “It’s so cute.”

“And so so sweet!” Octavia agreed.

“Stop teasing me.”

“Never, you know it,” Clarke laughed. “Now come back here, we’re gonna play cards now.”

Raven went back and sat down, but the butterflies in her stomach did not die down. She felt so oddly warm, and comfortable, like everything was in place – the stars overhead were beautiful, the fire crackled behind them, and the blue of the night seemed so much deeper and brighter than just a few moments before.

Her heart felt right, too.

It felt at ease, knowing Anya felt the same way she did.

 


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm coming towards an end with this fic, a few chapters and then i'll be done
> 
> it's been a ride and i love the soft fluffiness of this one even though honestly i'm the biggest angst-lover there probably is
> 
> but fluff is good sometimes, and definitely in this fic

It was a particularly slow shift. They had been called out just once in the past day, to what had turned out to be a butt-dial – even though Anya hated it when they were rushing from one case to another, she hated it even more when all she had to do was to sit in the ambulance waiting for a call, hour after hour.

She hadn’t slept for a day, not counting the brief naps here and there, and was dozing off without even wanting to.

“Two more hours,” muttered her partner, Monty, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel. “And then it’s home, sweet home.”

Anya just sighed. For the past two hours, all that she had been able to think about was a certain smirking brunette.

She hoped Raven had done the dishes like she’d asked her to.

Not that she cared most about dishes. No, she mostly cared about the fact that her aunt Indra had invited her for lunch the day after the next, and that she had decided to finally tell her aunt that she had a girlfriend.

She really did have to tell her, if she wanted Raven to be her plus one at the wedding. Which she did, she really did – she’d tried to not think about it for a few weeks, figured it wasn’t so important, but the fact remained that she did want to bring Raven out and hold her hand and kiss her in public, and do all the gross cutesy things she had watched Lexa do for all those years.

She wasn’t going to dance, though. That was a strict no.

Raven had tried to argue with her about it, but Anya had been adamant. She was up for everything else, but she was definitely not going to dance.

“Hey, Woods,” Monty said, “I’m going to pop out for some coffee. You want a cup?”

Anya shrugged. “Sure. But hurry back, god knows they always call at the most inconvenient times.”

Monty just rolled his eyes and jogged off, leaving Anya alone in the car.

She stared at the clock for a long minute, wondering if she could go to her locker and get her phone to call Raven. It was a Saturday, so Raven was most likely hanging out with Octavia, as she’d said she would be – and so Anya decided against bothering her, and instead laid back, shut her eyes, and prayed the time would pass quicker.

 

* * *

 

“Raven, you’ve done this jump a thousand times. Why do you want me to film it?”

“Because,” Raven sighed, ushering Octavia to hurry to the base of the ramp, “I’m going to do something legendary. And I want it recorded so one day I can prove to my grandkids that their abuela was cool once.”

“You want to have grandkids?” Octavia asked, stopping dead in her tracks and whirling around. “Which means you’d have to have kids? Who have you become?”

Raven frowned. “Shut up, it was a figure of speech-“

“You want kids with Anya! Admit it-“

“Shut up, O."

"Admit you want kids with Anya."

"No. Just have the camera ready, ok?”

Octavia grumbled something and headed down the ramp, still not sure as to what Raven was planning on doing. All she knew that there was a ramp and a jump and that Raven had a skateboard. And a helmet.

Raven hadn’t ever used a helmet until she’d met Anya. Now, she never forgot it. Octavia thought she looked ridiculous in her helmet and two braids, but knew not to say anything – she was just glad that Raven had finally realized that she wasn’t exactly invincible. Not to mention the fact that Octavia _knew_ it was Anya’s influence; that only made it better, she would’ve never wanted Raven to date anyone who changed her but Anya wasn’t exactly doing that, Anya was just introducing healthy and safe aspects to Raven’s otherwise haphazardly put-together life.

Octavia was truly happy for her.

She had yet to properly meet Raven’s girlfriend, she’d only met Anya before she’d found out about the major secret, and was dying to see the two of them interact. She wanted to find out if Anya in person made Raven even softer than what texts and phone calls from Anya did.

“Ok, are you filming?”

Octavia gave Raven a thumbs-up, and watched as her friend hopped onto her board and kicked up a proper speed, heading towards a different ramp than what she’d anticipated. She watched as Raven’s speed just increased, watched her come to the jump, and watched her board twirl in just the intended way before meeting her feet again as she disappeared beyond what Octavia could see.

“Okay, that was fucking awesome!” she yelled. "Definitely legendary!"

There wasn’t any answer from Raven.

Silence was never good when it came to Raven, which was why Octavia ran over as fast as she could, only to find Raven laying on the ground, cursing quietly under her breath.

“Raven? Are you okay?”

Raven’s face and everything about her position told Octavia the answer was very unlikely to be a yes.

“No, fuck no,” Raven finally groaned, “Fucking shit, my leg- I think I broke my leg-“

Octavia paled. “Don’t move, ok, fuck- ok, I’m gonna call 911-“

“Fucking shit,” Raven muttered. “I think my helmet’s broken too.”

“What happened?- wait, no, hi-“ Octavia started asking Raven a question but midway her words her call was answered, and she crouched by Raven to look over her as she explained the situation to the lady on the other end.

“Yeah, she did a skateboarding jump and she fell, I don’t know, ten feet? Her leg hurts, and her helmet’s broken so she probably hit her head too- yes, she’s conscious, swearing like a sailor- yes, she’s not trying to move, she’s lying on the ground-“

Raven wasn’t very conscious of anything, really. She was conscious of the shooting infernal pain in her leg, and of the throbbing ache in her head, and of the dozens of scrapes along her skin where the gravel had pushed through – but most of all, she was very conscious of the fact that she’d done something extremely stupid.

“This isn’t fucking legendary,” she spat, groaning a little. “This is just pathetic.”

“No, Raven, it was awesome but also so fucking stupid, and I’m never letting you anywhere near a skateboard ever again,” Octavia snapped, though she was nowhere near angry at her friend – she was scared, shocked, trembling a little while she sat by Raven, waiting for the ambulance to get there. “Yes, I’m still on the line,” she said to the phone. “She’s still conscious – Raven, does your head hurt a lot?”

Raven tried to nod but instead just groaned in pain. “Yup. A fucking shit-ton.”

 

* * *

 

The clock struck four and Anya’s shift ended. She had only just gotten out of her uniform when the door to the changing room opened, and heard her name being called.

“Anya?”

Anya frowned when she heard it was Niylah, and turned around to find the nurse standing in the doorway, looking oddly worried. “Yes?”

“I- um, don’t get too worried, but…your roommate was just brought in a little over an hour ago, I thought you’d be in the break room but you were here, and I figured you’d want to know and I came as soon as I-”

“What!?”

Before Niylah could even say anything else, Anya was already at the door. “Where? What happened?”

Niylah started hurrying down the hall to show Anya the way, and tried her best to explain the situation as they walked. “A skateboarding accident, she fell from some height I think, and she’s got a broken leg- she’s in there-“

Anya muttered a thanks as she walked into the room, not even noticing that there was someone else there in addition to Raven. No, all that she saw was Raven, laying in the bed, currently throwing up and looking just about as miserable as a person could.

“Raven, what the hell-!“

“Don’t yell,” Raven winced, causing Anya to shut up immediately. “My head hurts.”

It was then that Anya realized that Octavia was there, sitting by Raven’s bedside, holding her hair up and watching her with equal amounts of amusement and understanding in her eyes. "Hey," she muttered, sighing sat in the other chair on the other side of the bed, and, after a moment of hesitation, reached out for Raven’s hand.

She didn’t miss the slight smile that passed over Octavia’s lips when she saw the gesture.

“What the hell happened?” Anya asked, keeping her voice calm despite the fact that she was feeling anything but calm. “How did you…are you okay?”

Raven looked like she’d been to hell and back, and yet, when she looked at Anya and offered her an exhausted smile, Anya’s heart forgot how to properly function. She was beautiful even when she had dirt on her face and smelled like vomit, Anya didn't understand how it was possible, and yet, it was.

“I’m fi-ine,” Raven told her, “I did a badass trick and I’m clearly not badass enough, because I got hurt.”

"Did you hit your head?"

"I broke my helmet," Raven muttered. "Sorry."

Anya looked at Octavia. "Does she have a concussion?"

Octavia nodded. “She’s been vomiting for the past ten minutes. The doctor says she'll be fine, though.”

“Did they check-“

“Yes, they checked her,” Octavia nodded. “The whole shebang. And now she’s going to stay here for observation.”

“I wanna go home,” Raven complained, tugging at Anya’s hand. “I don’t like how this place smells.”

“That’s you, dummy,” Octavia told her. “You’re the one who’s been puking.”

Raven just frowned. “Shut up. Can’t we go home?”

Her last words were directed at Anya, who just sighed. “No.”

“Why not?”

“Because you hit your head, Raven, and you need to stay here in case something changes-“

“I was wearing a helmet,” Raven argued. “Just like you told me I should, well, no, you threatened to not let me sleep in your bed until I started using the helmet you bought me so I wore it even though I looked dumb-“

“Raven, without the helmet your head could’ve cracked open,” Anya sighed. “You could’ve died.”

Raven’s eyes widened. “Oh.”

Octavia was sitting there in complete silence, staring at the scene in front of her. She had never seen so many emotions on Anya’s face, not at once – she was so worried, and looked so soft, and caring, and the fact that the love between the two women in front of her was so blatantly obvious had Octavia grinning.

She’d spent the past hour assuring Raven, over and over, that Anya was coming. She’d called Anya’s phone at least three times, left voicemails and text messages, but to no avail – and every five minutes, Raven would tug at her sleeve, and ask after her again.

When they’d been left alone in the room, Raven had started mumbling some nonsense. At first, she hadn’t made much sense, but then, she’d started talking about Anya. And of course, Octavia hadn’t had the heart to stop her. She’d sat there, listening to Raven describe how pretty Anya’s hair looked, how good she was at doing different fancy braids; she’d learned what coffee Anya liked in the morning, and what her favorite tea was, and that she liked pineapples on pizza and Raven didn't but still ordered them on the pizza because she didn't really care and liked surprising Anya, she’d learned that Raven loved the shy smile that Anya got whenever she called her pretty, she’d even learned some things that she maybe hadn’t wanted to learn – things that she knew Raven didn’t really want her bringing up again.

Things like details about sex. But she’d just sat there, quietly laughing to herself as Raven smiled while describing how soft Anya’s boobs were and how good she was in bed.

She wasn’t going to mention it, of course. But she did find it painfully adorable how Raven’s entire posture had changed the moment Anya had come in, how she didn’t even notice anyone other than Anya – Octavia wasn’t offended, she saw no reason to, she was just happy that Raven had found herself a person. She'd been seeming lonely for far too long.

Now, she didn't seem lonely at all.

“I’m gonna go,” Octavia finally said, drawing Anya and Raven out of their little bubble. “I’m sure your girlfriend is more than capable of taking care of you.”

She smirked at Anya as she leaned in to kiss Raven’s forehead, and murmured a strict “do as she says, ok, she’s a medical professional” before heading out and leaving the two alone.

“My leg hurts,” Raven sighed, laying her head back onto the pillows. “And I don’t feel good.”

“You hit your head and broke your leg,” Anya reminded her. “You should be thankful it isn’t worse.”

“At least O got it on tape.”

“She what?”

“She filmed it,” Raven smiled. “I wanted it to be an awesome memory, to show my grandkids one day. Now it’s just sad.”

“It’s not sad, it’s going to be proof that I’ll use to ban you from ever skateboarding ever again,” Anya muttered. She was drawing patterns along Raven’s arm, she was still nervous, and worried, and didn’t like the fact that Raven’s head hurt, she didn’t like the fact that she was hurt at all – she mostly hated the fact that she hadn’t known at once, she know it wasn’t possible, but the fact that she’d found out a few hours later simply hurt.

“I’m sorry.”

Anya frowned and stared at Raven. “What?”

“I’m sorry.”

“Why?”

“You’re worried,” Raven mumbled, watching her in concern. “I didn’t want you to get worried. I shouldn’t have done the trick, now I’m hurt and you’re worried.”

“It’s…Raven, it’s fine that I’m worried. You can’t go back and tell yourself not to do the trick, so…it’s fine.”

“But it’s not. My leg’s broken.”

“Bones heal.”

“But it takes fore-ever.”

“But they will heal,” Anya insisted, leaning in a little. “And your head won’t hurt so much tomorrow.”

She leaned in a little more for a kiss, but Raven drew away. “Don’t kiss me, I’m gross.”

“Shut up.”

“I just threw up.”

Anya sighed and drew Raven’s face towards her, trying to be as gentle as she possibly could. “Just shut up.”

She didn’t care that she did taste the vomit on Raven’s lips.

She didn’t go in for a second kiss, but she was proud that she managed to keep herself composed enough that Raven didn’t notice that she was maybe a little bit grossed out. There was no way Anya was going to let her girlfriend think that she was gross, not when she was confused and probably drugged and in pain.

“Anya?”

“Hm?”

“Are you going to be my hot nurse?”

Anya couldn’t help but laugh. “If you want me to.”

“Can you put on a cute outfit and all? I know you have one in your closet-“

“We’ll talk at home,” Anya said quickly when a doctor walked in. “Now shush.”

 

* * *

 

It was no surprise that Raven wasn’t the easiest of patients.

She’d been kept at the hospital overnight, and Anya had slept in a chair by her bed, insisting that she was fine – she was so sleep deprived that she could’ve slept on the floor, so she really did not care. The nurses had told her that she could sleep in the break room, but she'd refused to leave Raven's side, knowing Raven wasn't the biggest fan of hospitals. 

But Anya understood that Raven was having a hard time, and so, allowed her to be a little irritating. She understood that the cast was big and blocky and annoying, and that it itched, and that she had headaches and felt tired and bored – she understood, and found that she had more patience than she’d initially anticipated.

Perhaps it was due to the fact that Raven was adorable and vulnerable, and perhaps it was the fact that she never failed to say please, despite requesting something every five minutes, sometimes even more frequently. And perhaps a great amount of thanks came not in words but in the smiles and soft kisses that Raven gave Anya whenever she could.

“So she’s fine?”

Anya hadn’t been surprised when Clarke and Lexa had shown up at their door. Clarke was Raven’s best friend, and, well – Clarke and Lexa were a package deal.

“Yeah, she’s fine,” Anya sighed. “She’s in there, you can go see her if you want.”

Clarke smiled and went her way, leaving Lexa to stand by Anya.

“Tea?”

“Sure,” Lexa said. “Are you okay?”

Anya sighed. “I’m fine.”

“You look like hell.”

“I had a two-day shift and then spent the night sleeping at the hospital. I think I'm allowed to look like hell.”

Lexa nodded and went over to get mugs while Anya rummaged the cupboards for some tea bags. “And she’s going to be fine, right?”

“Yeah, she’s just got a broken leg, her concussion was mild, so now she’s just confined to the bed and in understandable pain.”

“Whiney?”

“Very,” Anya chuckled. “But it’s fine.”

“Really? Because I recall one time you threatened to smother me-“

“That was one time, and you were being very annoying.”

“I know, I’m sorry I was such an annoying five year old,” Lexa smirked. “Oh, I told Aunt Indra what happened, she said she’ll call you later about lunch.”

“Oh fuck,” Anya cursed. “I forgot about lunch.”

“Don't worry, she called me in the morning and I told her you probably wouldn't come. She gets it.”

“Wait, what did you tell her?”

“That your girlfriend got in an accident-“

“You told her I have a girlfriend?”

Lexa’s eyes widened. “You _hadn’t_ told her?”

“I was going to tell her today!”

“Oh,” Lexa stammered. “Well…I didn’t tell her that it was Raven.”

Anya just sighed. “It’s fine…I guess it’ll be easier now.”

“It won’t be hard, trust me. She already loves Raven. And she'll just be happy to see you happy.”

“Who loves me?”

Anya and Lexa turned around to find Raven standing in the doorway, leaning on her crutches, smiling brightly. “I got bored of laying in bed. Who are we talking about?”

 

* * *

 

The moment Clarke and Lexa were gone, Raven’s smile dropped, and she let out an exasperated sigh.

“I’m tired.”

“What I don’t understand is why you acted like you were fine,” Anya said, walking by her as she made her way back to the bedroom, making sure she didn't trip.

“Because Clarke will worry her little head to pieces if she saw me in pain,” Raven shrugged. "It's no big deal."

“But you are in pain.”

“Not that much pain.”

“You make it seem like a lot of pain,” Anya muttered, taking Raven’s crutches and helping her into bed.

“I’m sorry.”

“No, Raven, don’t apologize again-“

But then Anya looked up and saw Raven was smiling, and knew she was only teasing.

“I’m sorry I try to be brave for my friends and only let you see the real me,” Raven continued, tossing the covers off the other side of the bed and patting the mattress to invite Anya to come lay with her. “I’m so so sorry I was a dumbass and flew half a mile in the air and got my leg snapped in half-“

Anya rolled her eyes and tossed a pillow at her. “Shut up.”

“Come lay with me.”

“I have dishes to do.”

“They can wait.”

“You were supposed to do them three days ago.”

Raven pouted, and Anya felt the very last bits of her determination melt away. “Please? I love you-“

“Oh shut up,” Anya groaned, climbing over to lay by Raven on the bed. “Stop it with the guilt trip.”

“Never, it gets me kisses and a hot chick in my bed.”

“That’s all I am, huh? A hot chick?”

Raven didn’t answer for a while, chiefly because she was preoccupied with kissing Anya’s lips. “No, that’s not all you are. Sometimes you’re a cute mess, too.”

“A cute mess?”

“In the mornings, with your bun barely held together and all your wide yawns and your grumpy frowns.”

“That’s cute to you? I feel like death in mornings,” Anya frowned.

“But it is cute, you’re cute,” Raven insisted, kissing her again. “And I know you don’t believe it.”

“I don’t.”

“But you’re cute anyway. Your stubbornness is cute.”

“Your stubbornness is just annoying,” Anya sighed, running her hand up along Raven’s stomach to rest on her chest. “And maybe a little bit cute.”

“Can we just nap?”

Anya already felt like she was half asleep. “Sure, but I do have to do the dishes or they’ll turn into toxic waste…”

“Later.”

“Mhm.”

“And then you can put on that hot nurse outfit.”

“No, not today.”

“Why not?” Raven whined. “Why would you deprive me of that joy?”

“Because I know,” Anya began, looking at Raven sternly, “I just know that you’ll insist on having sex once you see me in it-“

“Wow, someone’s got high expectations-“

“Are you saying you wouldn’t want to-?”

“No, I will definitely beg you to fuck me if you wear that skimpy outfit,” Raven agreed.

“And you’re not well enough, not yet.”

“It’s just a bum leg, I’ll be fi-ine.”

“We’ll see. Maybe next week.”

“Next week? I’ll die by then-“

Anya chuckled and gave Raven’s shoulder a shove. “Just shush, I’m trying to sleep.”

“Yes, Nurse Anya,” Raven replied, smirking a little. “Whatever you say.”

“Shush.”

“You shush.”

“Raven-“

“Fine. Good night.”

“It’s the middle of the afternoon.”

“Well…good afternoon.”

“Shut up.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> raven is honestly the greatest character i've ever come across and i love her so much


End file.
